Two Reunions
by Deeca
Summary: Still grieving over her mother's death, Jessica Hawke gets solace helping Alistair reclaim his life as Anders senses the connection he shares with him is closer than he realizes. Hawke/Anders Alistair/Cousland
1. Chapter 1

Two Reunions

Still grieving over her mother's death, Jessica Hawke gets solace helping Alistair reclaim his life as Anders realizes the connection he shares with him is closer than he realizes.

…..

Jessica Hawke watched Alistair finish his fourth drink as she waited with Anders for Isabela and Varric.

Alistair had been a fixture at the Hanged Man for three years and she would watch him as he drank the evening and night away. A few months ago, when Varric revealed Alistair was about to be evicted from his room. Jessica paid up his room and used her connections to get him a job on the docks. He actually showed up for work on time everyday and was sober for the most part but at sunset it would always be the same. He'd sit at the same booth and drown his despair with cheap whiskey. Varric and Isabela thought she was wasting her time and coin but she couldn't help it. There was a man buried beneath all that misery. A couple of weeks after her mother's death and still numb from it, she came to the Hanged Man hoping some cheap whiskey and bad poetry would take her mind off it but she spent the better part of a couple of hours watching Alistair drink. Suddenly out of the blue she joined him at his booth and though protesting at her intrusion, he also grew quiet when she mentioned her mother's death. They talked and for a few moments she saw the man he used to be come to the surface. He was actually kind and sympathetic, and asked her about her mother and her family. It was when mentioning being from Lothering that made him push her away. His gentle expression changed and he suddenly looked at her if she was a leper.

There were times when Alistair unleashed a tirade onto Anders as well. If Anders showed any affection towards her it was as if something ignited in Alistair. He would go off and warn Anders on how she would betray him.

Jessica worried that this would always awaken Justice and she feared for Alistair but amazingly Justice never came out and Anders always seemed calm when the verbal attacks occurred.

Jessica was shocked when on one occasion, Alistair had completely depleted her of mana and she realized he had once been a templar. She was equally surprised when Anders did not appear did not seem fazed when hearing this. And that was he unveiled some revelations about Alistair and how he knew of him.

"I know he used to be a templar," Anders said solemnly. "Remember when I said Alistair was the heir to throne in Ferelden? He was also the other surviving Warden who traveled with the Hero of Ferelden."

"And how do you know this?" Jessica's eyes widened.

"She was the Commander of the Wardens and was the one who conscripted me."

"And she made you get rid of Ser Pounce A Lot?" Jessica's eye's glared.

"No," Anders chuckled. "Elissa was the one who gave him to me. It was the Commander who took her place that made me get rid of him. It was never the same once she left."

"Did you two have…?"

"Oh no," Anders laughed. "Maker knows I flirted with her constantly but it never got past that. Her heart always belonged to Alistair."

"What happened to them that made him so….broken?"

"She let Loghain live at the Landsmeet before the end of the Blight. His mentor was the Warden Commander before Elissa and he was killed at Ostagar because of Loghain's betrayal. Alistair felt so angry and betrayed that he left before the final battle. The poor fool doesn't even realize she saved his life. It takes a Warden to slay an archdemon and they have to die too."

"So Loghain slew the archdemon?"

"He gave the final blow," Anders said. "It was Elissa who brought the dragon down. I heard the tale from people who were on the roof. Loghain pushed her away, took the final blow and was killed."

"So this Duncan that he rambles about having failed him was the commander?"

"Yes and Elissa told me Alistair regarded him like a father," Anders explained. "Alistair's despair is not just about Elissa. He betrayed the Wardens and Duncan's memory and bears that burden everyday."

"So can you explain why he attacks me then?" Jessica asked. "Do I remind him of her? Was she a mage?"

"Elissa was a rogue but she was as close to a mage as one could possibly get," Anders said thoughtfully. "She actually saved the Circle in Ferelden when she was trapped in the Fade. We also were trapped in the Fade again when on a mission in Amaranthine. She is one of strongest non mage persons that I know. I think the reason Alistair gets bothered by your presence is because you're beautiful, have a kind heart, and possess a similar strength that Elissa had. Remember that day you insisted on sitting with him? That's something Elissa would do."

"Do the Wardens know about him?"

"The Wardens didn't care when I left," Anders chuckled. "I doubt they care what Alistair has done."

"I remember the one that took Carver away. Stroud," Jessica said. "He was polite but cold. Will my brother turn into that?"

"Not all of them are like that," Anders explained. "It's just that the single focus of the Wardens is the eradication of the darkspawn between, during, and after Blights. Elissa was not like them. She was actually…fun to work with. The older Wardens didn't like her because of it. Carver is part of a different generation so things should be different."  
>"How old was she when she became Warden Commander?"<p>

"Elissa was barely twenty one," Anders said.

"Maker!" Jessica exclaimed. "She's around my age now."

"Yes," Anders nodded. "There's… something else you two share in common."

"What?"

"Her mother…was murdered," Anders said in a solemn tone. "Actually her whole family was murdered except for her brother who ended up missing in the Wilds for nearly a year during the Blight."

Jessica briefly looked away when thoughts of her mother flooded her mind.

"How did she survive?"

"It was Duncan who saved her," Anders explained. "Rendon Howe was the man who had her family murdered."

"You mean to tell me she's a Cousland?" Jessica's eyes widened. "We killed those conspirators who were trying to kill the Warden Commander. I heard of the Couslands being massacred, I just had no idea the Hero of Ferelden was a Cousland. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Elissa is very uncomfortable with the accolades and the attention she gets regarding her status. She's a very private person and when she left Amaranthine she only told me and a few others. Elissa did so much for me; I felt I owed it to her not to mention her. She even killed templars for me in an attempt to get my phylactery."  
>"Elissa is pro mage then?"<p>

"Oh yes." Anders smiled. "Her grandfather believed mages deserved more freedom and she shared that belief."

"It sounds like I would like her."

"And she would like you," Anders said. "I hope you understand why I kept it quiet that I knew her."

"Yes," Jessica nodded. "I would be the same way."

Jessica turned and watched Alistair down another drink and felt her heart sank.

"Jess," Anders took her hand. "You know it makes me love you even more the way you are concerned for him and I know you wanting to help him is your way of dealing with what happened to your mother but sometimes people just don't want to be helped."

"I know," Jessica let out a sigh. "And you're right. If mother was alive and saw him, she would not stop bothering him until he let her help him."

"Elissa told me she was angry at him in the beginning but eventually it went away because she knew that Alistair would end up hating himself more."

"What would Elissa think of Justice?" Jessica asked.

Anders grew pale and the peaceful expression on his face slowly faded away, replaced with anxiety and a touch of regret.

"Jess, Elissa _knew_ Justice," Anders explained. "He initially inhabited the body of a dead Warden. She considered him a friend and he respected her. And I honestly don't know what she would think now."

"Are you telling me that Justice was in a body that was…already dead?" Jessica picked up her drink and set it down.

"Yes and we could smell him through the heavy armor he wore."

"So I guess that's one of the reasons he approves of the baths we share," Jessica teased.

"Yes," Anders blushed. "Justice reluctantly admits that as much of distraction you've been for me, you've been very good for me as well."

"Well that's good to know," Jessica laughed softly as she continued to watch Alistair.

"Justice thinks you are wasting time with him," Anders said. "And its not only drinking he has a problem with. The reason your mana got depleted so rapidly is because he is using lyrium. It would not have happened so fast if he wasn't using it. It's also why he shows up on the docks in a semi sober state."

"Where do you think he's getting it?" Jessica asked. "Has he ever been to Darktown, the sewers? I've seen him here, stumbling around Lowtown and the docks."

"I think he's probably getting it from another dock worker, or he's stealing it when the Circle ships lyrium potions."

"I think I might have to check that out," Jessica said.

"Alright," Anders sighed. "Since I can't convince you to leave it alone, you know you can count on me to help. I think Elissa would have wanted me to keep an eye on him. And it's not interfering with our other… activities so Justice won't be complaining too much."

"Thank you," Jessica reached over and kissed him. "I'll make it up to you tonight."

"I expect you to," Anders gave a knowing smile and watched Varric and Isabela enter the tavern.

"It's about time," Jessica stood up. "Are we still on to play? I want to win back that ten gold I lost the last time."

"Sorry about the Hawke," Varric said. "Isabela had to watch that huge ship as it docked."

"What ship?" Anders asked.

"There's a ship that came in from Ferelden. It's about three times the size of the other ships. Two ships had to move just so it could dock."

"Interesting," Jessica said. "I'd like to go see that but right now I am in the mood for some Wicked Grace. Fenris is upstairs waiting with Merill."

"Isabela," Anders said as he walked over to her. "Are you alright?"

Isabela let out a sigh and she looked dreamily at him, "What? Did you say something?"

"She's alright Anders," Jessica laughed. "Izzy just had an erotic daydream about walking naked on the deck of that ship."

"You know me too well Hawke," Izzy growled.

"Let's get upstairs and get the game started," Varric grinned. "Its good we're staying in tonight. They sent everyone home at the docks. There's a big storm coming. The Arishock was even spotted climbing up the latter to get to higher ground."

As they headed upstairs, Jessica took one last glance at Alistair before Anders grabbed her hand.

…

"Thank you for helping me Teagan," Elissa said as she paced around the cabin. "I hope we haven't wasted time coming here. He could be gone by now."

"You don't have to thank me Elissa," Teagan said. "I _want _to do this. I owe it to Alistair for how the mistakes Eamon made in caring for him and for what Isolde did."

"Your brother is not too happy with you for doing this."

"I don't care what Eamon thinks," Teagan said bitterly. "He's still bitter that Alistair walked away from the crown and that I married Bella. I just happy that Anora has allowed Alistair back in Ferelden and she won't go after him."

"Yes. That little information that came my way certainly helped Anora to…change her mind," Elissa smiled. "Sadly though, I think Ferelden will be in for a battle when the time comes for a new ruler,"

"I'll be too old to care by then," Teagan said. "The future generation of Ferelden can deal with it. Odds are your new baby nephew might be king."

"True," Elissa smiled when thinking of her nephew. Fergus remarried a widow a couple of years ago and even adopted her daughter as his own but six months ago Bryce Oren Cousland was born and holding him in his arms for the first time was one of her most cherished memories.

"So tell me again how you got this tip?" Teagan asked as he poured two drinks.

"A new Warden by the name of Carver mentioned it by accident when I was visiting the compound in Nevarra," Elissa said as she took a sip. "It has to be him."

"I'll do my best to look for him when I'm not conducting business." Teagan promised.

"Thank you Teagan," Elissa said gratefully. "Hopefully I'll muster the courage to face him."

"You know if he is drinking like that Warden said he was that will have to be dealt with."

"Carver said his sister is a mage," Elissa said. "He was her and a group in the Deep Roads when he became ill. Some Wardens were there and saved him. We can ask for her help if we need to."

"He had to become a Grey Warden in order to live?" Teagan asked.

"Yes," Elissa said. "He became a Warden while she became very wealthy from the treasure they found."

"I've heard some disturbing things about the Circle in Kirkwall," Teagan said. "I'm surprised she's even free."

"I know. There was a Warden Mage in Nevarra who escaped the Circle. He told me some things about Kirkwall and how the mages are treated. It really angered me that that Wardens refuse to get involved in these matters."

"Do the Wardens know what you are doing now?" Teagan asked.

"No," Elissa laughed. "Given my status…I can get away with a lot. All they know is I am here to check that entrance to the Deep Roads."

"You know you don't have to worry about me revealing your presence," Teagan said. "The ship Captain says there's a storm coming. I am just relieved we're docked."

"I guess I'll do some exploring tonight," Elissa said.

"Just be careful," Teagan said. "Kirkwall has never been known for being safe at night."

"Teagan," Elissa laughed, "With what I've experienced, I think I am more than capable of handling whatever comes my way and I'll have Rex with me. He will be happy to get out of the hold."

"You're right," Teagan chuckled. "I'll just tell the guards to ignore it when you come and go."

"Thanks," Elissa smiled. "Have I mentioned lately what a wonderful friend you've been?"

"About a dozen times," Teagan grinned.

"Well I am saying it again," Elissa grinned. "You stood by me when I made that decision. You, Zevran and my brother were the only ones and I will _never _forget that."

"You are alive Elissa," Teagan said. "And Alistair is alive. That's all that matters."

"I just hope its not too late for Alistair to understand that," Elissa sighed before heading to the hold to retrieve her dog.

….

**A/N: I swore to myself that I would not write anything for Dragon Age 2 but this came to me based on two things: The Alistair drunken cameo and Elissa's friendship with Anders and what her reaction will be when she finds out about him. This story will be shorter than my other stories and I promise it won't consume me and it will not interfere with my other will probably be the only story I write for DA:2 unless I get really inspired. Thanks for reading. :-)**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**The First Sighting**

Anders always thought the massive cliffs of Kirkwall would shield the city from any monster storm, but he was wrong. That storm unleashed a fury the city had not experienced in two centuries according to the history books. Heavy winds and rain tore through the city and while the docks and Darktown bore the brunt of it, Lowtown and even Hightown had suffered damage. Anders did not know whether to feel troubled or relieved that with the exception of some minor flooding, the Gallows had survived unscathed

Several of the windows of the estate had blown out. The other mansions had similar damage but of course their occupants balked when aid was focused on the docks and Darktown.

Anders smiled when seeing Jessica sleeping peacefully beside him. It had only been a week since the storm hit but everyone was still exhausted. His clinic was still drying out so he spent the week holed up with Jessica relaxing. And while it made Justice restless, he didn't mind one bit. Every free moment they shared was a revelation and just when he thought he could not love her any more, she would do something and it would be like falling in love with her again. Jessica was his strength and inspiration. She helped him keep control as they worked together to help those mages seeking freedom. She thought being wealthy from that expedition would solve everything but it confined her. Aside from having bought the mansion back and the three household staff she employed, Jessica lived rather simply and Anders preferred it that way. They had their privacy and her wealth enabled people to look…_away _when they did things. Putting an arm around her, Anders closed his eyes and went back to sleep.

…**..**

**The Night of the Storm**

…

As they were played cards and joked around, it became difficult to focus as the wind howled outside and crept through the cracks. When the roof started to leak Anders could no longer concentrate and set his cards down. It didn't matter anyway, he didn't play with money, his winnings were written promises to help the mages and refugees and he had won several including a couple from Fenris who always repaid his debts no matter _what_ they were. As for his losses, he would just have to whip up some of his special salves for Isabela.

"I can't take this," Jessica set her cards down and got up. "And Varric, I'll gladly contribute to help get the roof fixed and we can have the games at my place for the time being."

"But Sandal is always staring at my breasts when I am there," Isabela complained.

"Maybe he wants to _enchant_ them," Fenris said.

Everyone laughed while Isabela could only feign indignation.

Just then a loud crash sent them all running downstairs and they saw the door to the Hanged Men was nearly off its hinges. People had poured in from the streets, some suffering from cuts and scrapes from the flying debris.

It sounded like the world was ending outside as everyone huddled to the other side of the room.

Jessica and Anders looked at each other.

"Darktown!"

There were refugees needed to get underground to the sewers to wait out this storm and Anders hoped the Coterie would not be interfering.

"We're heading to Darktown," Jessica said as she followed Anders to the door.

"Are you insane?" Isabela asked. "It's not safe!"

"Since when have we let that stop us?" Anders asked.

"I'm going with you," Fenris said.

"For the love of Maker!" Isabela griped. "I'll go."

"Thank you," Jessica said. "Merrill, you and Varric stay here and help everybody."

"We will," Varric promised.

Jessica glanced at Alistair who seemed oblivious to what was going on and immediately went to him.

"Get up Alistair! Its time to stop wallowing in self pity."

"Leave me be," He growled and pushed her away, making her stumble.

"Don't you touch her!" Anders roared as he came to her defense. "You are going to do what the lady says. Get up!"

He shot a rejuvenation spell at Alistair and watched it glow around him.

"Jess, now is a good time to practice what I taught you."

Anders watched her as she performed the same spell then looked and saw Alistair had reclaim most of his clarity. Those weeks of teaching her simple healing and rejuvenation spells have finally paid off.

"What do you need me to do?" Alistair asked.

"You need to come with us," Jess said.

Anders watched as Isabela grabbed Alistair by the hand and they headed out the door.

…..

The storm was relentless as they made their way to darktown. The downpour and debris from the wind made navigating the street nearly impossible and they clung to each other and anything solid they could get their hands on.

Fortunately the streets were mostly deserted, but they did encounter a few people and managed to get them to safety.

Anders watched in admiration as Alistair helped carry two children to safety as Jessica helped their mother. He was finally seeing the man that Elissa told him about. Anders watched as Alistair soothed their fears as he knelt down and helped each of them get inside the house and in their mother's arms.

Darktown was a flooded mess as they hurriedly helped the people who were still scattered about. The Coterie were surprisingly agreeable as they helped people into the sewers.

Anders watched as Jess hurriedly heal a woman then hand her to Alistair who helped her down the sewer entrance. Jessica stood up and as she stepped back, tripped over the debris.

Anders rushed to her side when seeing she stumbled over a body.

He turned it over and saw it was one of the thugs who used to demand payment from him. From his the gaping wound on his neck, Anders could tell that someone had snuck up from behind and got him.

"Good riddance!"

Anders and Jessica saw Tomwise lugging a bag of what apparently the remains of his supplies.

"What happened?"

"That monster was preventing people from getting to the sewers."

"Who killed him?"

"I didn't see their face," Tomwise said. "That monster grabbed this woman and started to paw at her as people were running around. People were trying to help but he fought them off. All of the sudden this person came out of nowhere and just got him. Then they helped the woman to the sewer."

"That's good somebody dealt finally dealt with him," Anders said as inspected Tom for wounds.

"That's the person who killed him," Tomwise pointed.

Anders looked to see the hooded figure in the distance helping someone to the other sewer entrance. They then disappeared around the corner.

They continued to help people to the sewers but Anders could not shake the feeling there was something about that hooded figure.

"You are a Warden," Alistair said as he came up to him. "I can finally sense you."

"Yes Alistair," Anders said.

"Are there any other Wardens here?"

"No," Anders looked back to where he saw the hooded figure. "It's just us."

"The storm has subsided," Alistair said.

"We're probably in the eye," Anders brushed the dirt off Alistair's arm and healed the cut on his arm.

"You've done a good thing Alistair," Anders said. "Elissa would be proud."

Anders knew the second after he said her name that it was a mistake. Alistair recoiled from him.

"How do you know that name? Elissa is dead. She's dead and I abandoned her! And _nothing_ will change that." Alistair pushed him away and ran off.

"She's _not_ dead Alistair," Anders yelled. "Come back!"

"Alistair!" Jessica called.

"I'm sorry," Anders said.

"What happened?"

"I told him Elissa would be proud of him for helping and he just lost it. He thinks…she's dead."

"He was doing so well too."

"There is _nothing_ we can do about it now," Anders said as he looked in the distance where that hooded person was. "Let's find Izzy and Fenris then get underground."

"What are you looking at?" Jessica asked.

"It's nothing," He said. "Let's go."

….

Anders opened his eyes and sat up. There was no point in rehashing the events, it was time to move on and get past it.

Getting up, he slipped on his robe.

"You're awake."

Anders turned to see Jessica sitting up in bed.

"I didn't mean to wake you," He said. "I was going to head to the clinic and straighten up."

"Not until we've had our bath and breakfast," Jessica jumped out of bed and put her arms around him. "Some nice hot porridge, ham, and those biscuits you like."

"And to think, I was just going to grab an apple on the way out," Anders said as he kissed her. "And how can I say no to sharing a bath with you?"

"Good," Jessica kissed his nose, which made him chuckle.

"And what are your plans today?"

"Oh you know me. I'll probably go the Hanged Man and see if Varric has anything for us to do and maybe check on Alistair."

"Jess, just don't push him if you see him," Anders said. "He really thinks Elissa is dead."

"I won't," Jessica promised. "I just want to make sure he's alright. I wish there was something we can do. Why does he think she's dead?"

"I don't know," Anders said "Maybe he came across some Wardens during his travels and heard some things."

"You need to tell him that she's _alive_," Jessica said. "It could help him."

"Or make things _worse_," Anders said. "I need to get him in a room when I do that but my first real concern is to see whether he is using lyrium."

"I hope he isn't," Jessica sighed.

"Come on. Let's get that bath," Anders kissed her. "I'm sure Orana has it ready for us."

…

A few hours later Jessica was pacing around Varric's suite as he was polishing Bianca.

"Hawke I know you are bored," he said. "The storm changed everyone's priorities. People are still cleaning up from it and thanking their God or Gods that they survived. It could have been a lot worse you know."

"Incidentally, it's amazing how _quickly_ the Hanged Man got repaired," Jessica folded her arms and looked at Varric.

"Like I said Hawke, it's all about priorities."

"I'm just…bored," Jessica sighed and paced around the room.

"I told you being in Hightown would bore you," Varric laughed. "What did you do in Lothering?"

"Ran the farm," Jessica replied. "When my father was alive, we would help the occasional mercenaries that came our way and the occasional apostates."

"See?" Varric laughed. "What did I tell you? You just aren't the type to host tea parties."

"Maker knows I tried," Jessica sighed.

"Don't worry, when things get back to normal, there will be jobs for us," Varric promised.

"Have you seen Alistair?"

"I saw him leave for the docks this morning," Varric said disdainfully. "He was even sober."

"That's good to know," Jessica said. "I thought I would have to go to his room and drag him out."

"You know Hawke I'm surprised Blondie isn't jealous," Varric teased.

"Anders has _nothing_ to be jealous about Varric," Jessica said. "He happens to be concerned because Alistair is a Grey Warden too."

"Really?" Varric's eyes widened. "A drunken Warden! Now I _know _there has to be a story to that."

"There is," Jessica said. "And I promise to tell you once there is an ending."

….

Later that day, Jessica stood in the distance and watched Alistair stack crates and clean up debris. His expression was blank and when someone went over to speak to him, he would nod or shake his head in reply then continue with his work. The poor man barely existed and it made her sad to see it. She had seen Alistair briefly come alive at the tavern when sitting with him. And there was the night of the storm, when he held those two children in his arms, comforted them, and gave their mother a polite smile when she thanked him for helping her. She could see there was a kind soul buried beneath the misery and despair.

Jessica walked over as he ate two slices of bread that looked as if it had a slice of cheese between them.

"Oh for the love of the Maker!" He glared up at her. "What in the blazes do you want?"

"I just wanted to see if you were alright."

"Alright," Alistair laughed ruefully. "I'll _never_ be alright. I am just biding my time until my Calling."

"Calling?"

"It doesn't matter. You wouldn't understand."

"You loved her a great deal didn't you?"

"She was the love of my life," Alistair said. "And I abandoned her and everything we worked for."

"I'm sorry."

"Just leave me alone."

Jessica turned but took one last glance at Alistair before walking away.

…..

At the other side of the docks, Jessica found Isabela watching that huge ship as it was getting repairs. While some of the smaller ships ran aground or sank because of the storm. This massive ship stayed afloat but suffered serious damage to its mast and rigging.

"It's so beautiful," Isabela sighed. "Its unfortunate it took on damage, it looks like its going to be stuck here for awhile."

"Why?" Jessica asked. "Is there are other damage?"

"The hull on the other side needs repairs as well," Isabela said. "And I heard the hold took on water."

"Who owns the ship?"

"All I know is that it came from Ferelden."

"It certainly is big."

"I would give anything to just walk its deck," Isabela sighed.

"Why don't you ask then?"

"Look at those guardsmen patrolling the deck and the gate to the dock is guarded," Isabela said. "The only time I'll be able to walk that ship's deck is in my dreams."

"I'm bored," Jessica said. "Hear any rumors we can investigate?"

"No," Isabela. "Everyone is just drying out."

"Let's get back to the Hanged Man," Jessica said. "Anders said he would meet me there."

Jessica and Isabela turned and walked down the path, and didn't see the two people appear on the deck of the ship.

….

"Teagan, this place is like the surface version of Orzammar," Elissa said. "Except the people in Dust Town live in the lap of luxury compared to what the people have to endure in Darktown."

"Yes, the class division is far more noticeable here than most of Ferelden," Teagan agreed.

"And there are so many Ferelden refugees living in squalor."

"I know, I think I have an idea that might help some of them if I can manage to get an appointment with the viscount," Teagan said as he watched the workers. "I'm hearing he is not the strongest of leaders though."

"How long will the repairs take?"

"Several weeks, plus some supplies have to be brought in," Teagan sighed. "I'm afraid we're stuck here."

"It's alright," Elissa said. "That gives me time to check out that Deep Roads entrance for the expedition the Wardens are planning and we can find Alistair."

"I've already checked several of the taverns in Hightown," Teagan said. "There has been no sign of him."

"You know for awhile I actually thought he was in Darktown," Elissa said. "That night of the storm, I sensed another Warden when I was there. My mind was probably playing tricks on me."

"Elissa, If and when I find Alistair you are planning to talk to him aren't you? I mean we just can't sail back to Ferelden with the both of you in separate areas on the ship. What are you afraid of?"

"I know its silly Teagan but it has been a long time. What if he hates me?"

"I don't think he could ever hate you Elissa," Teagan said reassuringly.

"I guess we'll see about that," Elissa said.

"What are your plans for tonight?"

"I'll be having supper with you and then later on I'll get my gear and head out of town to find that Deep Roads entrance. According to the directions I got, it's just outside of town. It will give me chance to further explore the area."

"I think going to look for an inn tomorrow," Teagan said. "I don't think my back can handle another night in that cabin,"

"I can stay here and monitor the progress of the repairs once I get back."

"I'd appreciate that," Teagan smiled.

As they were about to head to the galley, they both saw the Qunari walking down dock and back to the compound.

"Those Qunari look different from the one you traveled with," Teagan remarked.

"Yes," Elissa agreed. "But they share the same stoic expression."  
>"That they do," Teagan chuckled as they headed to the galley.<p>

…

The streets of Lowtown were deserted as Anders made his way down the road. A few hours earlier he had been playing cards when a man came in the Hanged Man begging for help. His five year old son had fallen down the stairs, breaking his leg. Anders immediately got up and headed for the door but Jessica stopped him briefly to hand him some coin to give to the family.

The boy was now walking slowly around the rundown house and the gold he gave the family would help them eat for quite awhile. A Mabari suddenly ran past him towards the side gate which led out of town. A person emerged from the shadows and the dog happily greeted them. It was too dark to see the person but the cloud obscuring the moon soon moved away and they were bathed in its light. Anders suddenly sensed the feeling another Warden was near and looked around before watching the person. A guard carrying a torch approached them. Anders watched as the person lifted their hood down and he could immediately discern the person was a woman by the long flowing hair. The woman shook the man's hand and he walked away.

As the guard walked towards him, Anders immediately saw it was Donnic and went over to him. He rather liked Donnic because they shared a similar dislike for the templars.

"Good evening Anders," Donnic said politely. "What brings you out tonight?"

"I tended to a little boy who broke his leg," Anders said.

"Good to hear," Donnic smiled appreciatively. "You are putting your Maker given talent to use."

And it was that statement that made him not only like Donnic but often wish he was guard captain instead of Aveline. He accepted Anders for who he was. If more people were like Donnic, he wouldn't have to resort to things he's been doing.

"Thank you Donnic," Anders smiled. "Your words are appreciated."

"I had no idea there were other female Wardens besides the one who saved Ferelden."

"I beg your pardon?" Anders could feel his heart beat against his chest.

"I thought you knew," Donnic said. "The woman I just gave directions to is a Warden and quite pretty too."

"Oh," Anders watched as another guardsman opened the gate and the woman went out, her dog following faithfully beside her.

"Goodnight Anders," Donnic said before continuing on with his patrol.

"Night."

Thoughts raced through Anders mind and he wasn't sure if it was Justice that was propelling him towards the gate or if he was moving by his own free will.

The guardsmen opened the gate and he was standing on the road they followed when embarking on their expedition to the Deeproads.

It was beginning to make sense. The cloaked figure in Darktown during the storm and the way that thug was killed, not to mention the Mabari that ran past him. She would also keep her anonymity by only going out at night.

"Elissa."

She had been his best friend as well as his commander and the possibility that this Warden could be her overwhelmed him. He was surprised how his thoughts of Elissa did not cause any discontent with justice but was worried what her reaction would be when learning about their merging.

Ander's mind went back to Alistair and he realized that helping him would be another thing he could do that would _not _involve violence. She did so much for him, supported him, that even if that warden was not Elissa, he owed it to her to do this.

Turning around he headed back to town deciding not to tell Jess for the time being in case he was wrong.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Anders and Jessica watched as the boat carrying three mages drifted away.

"Isabela said her friend will be anchored about ten miles from here," Anders said. "They'll pick them up there."

"Best fifty sovereign I've ever spent." Jessica smiled. "Its too bad he doesn't come around that often."

"I know," Anders agreed. "It's the _perfect_ way to get them out of Kirkwall without any notice."

Jessica looked down at the two bodies of the blood mages and watched Isabela drag the body of the templar toward them.

"Let's get the other templar moved, sweep the trail, and get out of here," Jessica said. "We still have to meet Fenris."

"You don't have to tell me twice," Isabela said. "At least this one had five gold on him."

"You _need _to see this," Varric called.

Jessica and Anders navigated the rocky path and bush and found Varric standing by the remains of three darkspawn.

"You think those blood mages killed them?" Varric asked.

"No," Anders said. "It looks like they have been dead for at least three days."

"Look at the neck of that one," Jessica pointed the one in the middle that had its neck torn open. "Only a dog like Sam could do that type of damage."

"Do you sense anymore around Blondie?" Varric asked.

"I can't sense them when they are _dead _Varric," Anders said sarcastically. "And there aren't more lurking about. These were probably just some stragglers."

"Anders are you alright?" Jessica asked.

"I'm fine," Anders said as he continued to stare at the bodies. "We should go meet up with Fenris and see if he found out anymore on those slavers."

"Two jobs in one day," Jessica sighed.

"See?" Varric grinned. "What did I tell you Hawke? I said the boredom would end. Have I ever been wrong?"

"You were wrong about that rumor about that buried treasure." Isabela reminded him.

"Rivanni," Varric glared. "I can count on my hands and toes how many times your leads have been wrong."

"Point taken," Isabela hissed.

"Let's go meet Fenris," Jessica laughed. "If we're in luck, we could make it back to town by this evening."

…..

After a trek down the other road and a hike up a rocky path, they found Fenris sitting outside the slaver cave.

"They're dead," Fenris said in an annoyed tone before cussing in his native language.

"I take it they were already dead when you got here," Jessica said.

"You think I enjoy sitting here and doing _nothing_?" Fenris asked angrily.

"You're just mad because you couldn't do that fisting thing to those big bad slavers," Anders said _tauntingly._

_ "Shut up!" _

_ J_essica watched as Fenris's markings began to glow.

"You know, the Grey Wardens would love having someone like you," Anders said as he went into a defensive stance. "You certainly brood enough and they would _love_ that fisting thing."

"Come on," Jessica stifled a laugh and took Anders arm. "Let's go inside and have a look for ourselves."

"There's a locked chest in there," Fenris said. "Whoever killed them apparently had no interest in it."

"Locked chest you say?" Varric grinned as Isabela licked her lips greedily. "We'll meet you inside."

Jessica watched as they hurriedly went into the cave.

"How many were there?" Jessica asked

"Three," Fenris said as he furiously wiped his foot with some leaves.

"What's wrong with your foot?" Anders said.

"I stepped in dog shit in the blasted cave," Fenris glared. "You think I am doing this for fun?"

"I'm sorry Fenris," Jessica chuckled as she watched Anders smirk. "At least you can't blame Sam. He's with Aveline helping her with the recruits."

"Hawke, your dog is polite when he does his….business," Fenris said. "He always wanders off to the side or runs to an open area. He never does it right out on the path where we're walking."

"We'll be back in a few minutes," Jessica dragged a laughing Anders away just as he was about to say something.

…

Jessica and Anders looked down at the two bodies that were lying on the ground as Isabela and Varric worked to get the chest open.

The other slaver's body the encountered earlier was lying face down.

"She got them by surprise," Anders remarked.

"She?" Jessica looked him.

"I mean they were taken by surprise," Anders said hastily.

"By the Maker!"

Jessica turned to see Isabela look jubilant as she and Varric pulled out several sacks of gold.

"This was a probably a drop location," Varric remarked. "Along with the slaver documents, there's a bottle of wine, a small bag of gems, and I'd estimate at least three hundred gold."

"I promised Aveline I'd bring the slaver documents for her records," Jessica said.

"Please Hawke," Isabela begged. "Don't tell her about the gold, she'd want to put it back in city's coffers."

"Don't worry," Jessica grinned. "I'll just give her the bag of gems."  
>"We are going to divide the coin five ways," Anders said. "My share will be going to the refugees."<p>

"My share will be going to help feed the refugees as well," Jessica said. "I don't need the money. I have enough gold in the vault I don't spend."

"And that's why you should have stayed in Lowtown," Isabela said. "You don't fit in Hightown. You could have bought the Hanged Man with Varric and two of the rooms could have been converted into a suite for you and Anders."

"The estate wasn't for me," Jessica replied. "I bought it for my mother."

Jessica looked away as she felt her lower lip start to quiver.

"I'm heading back outside. Let's hurry and get back to town. I want to take a long hot bath and relax."

Jessica turned and hurried back towards the cave entrance. It had been nearly six months since her mother's death but there were still the occasional moments when she was brought back to that night under the bowels of the foundry. On her father's deathbed, Jessica vowed she would take care of the family. She had failed him. Bethany and her mother were dead and Carver was now a Grey Warden because of catching the Blight corruption during their expedition.

It was her mother's death that changed her. When confronting and dealing with blood mages, she used to feel killing them was giving them mercy from the demons that preyed on their minds. After the horrific things Quentin did to her mother, she realized that most of these mages acted on their own free will. Her father was once told her that blood magic was the scourge that would bring all mages down and he was right. She no longer felt pity for killing them and it was why she was so hard on Merrill.

"Are you alright?"

She turned to see Anders standing before her.

"I'm fine," Jessica put her arms around him. "I just want to head back to town."

"I have our share of the coin," Anders said as kissed her. "Where's Fenris?"

"I guess he already left."

"Isabela said she would give him his share and Varric said we could on ahead."

"Lets go then," Jessica took his hand and they went down the path.

….

Anders came down the stairs paced around room. They had made it back to Kirkwall just after sundown. Orana had prepared a light supper for them and Bodhan had the bath prepared. Jess fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow and he managed a few hours himself.

Sitting on the bench, his mind raced back to those dead darkspawn and the bodies of those slavers they found.

It would be like Elissa to explore any cave she came across. After killing those darkspawn, she probably decided to scout the whole area.

"Where are you?"

It had been a week since he saw the woman exit the city gate with her dog and the events of yesterday have made him come closer to the realization that it was indeed Elissa.

Justice actually had more certainty that it was her and kept pressuring him to find her.

Anders looked up to see Sandal coming towards him, holding a new staff.

"Enchantment!" Sandal handed him the staff. "Sparkly."

"Lightening then?" Anders said. "Thank you Sandal."

During their travels, he and Jessica would always bring back various staves they came across and Sandal would work his own unique magic on them. His ability with enchanting was unlike anything Anders had ever seen.

And then it dawned on him. Bodhan and Sandal had frequently traveled with Elissa, Alistair and their motley group.

"Sandal do you remember Alistair?" Anders asked.

"He liked cheese," Sandal laughed.

"Yes he did," Anders said. "Elissa told me about that."

"She was nice and pretty too," Sandal looked at him.

"Yes Sandal, she is," Anders said. "Alistair is in Kirkwall but he's very….sad." Anders said. "Would you like to help me…with him? I know Elissa would be happy to know that you helped me."

"Enchantment!" Sandal nodded his head and clapped his hands.

"I'm going to go to the clinic for a bit but I will be back later." "Enchantment!" Sandal continued to clap his hands happily as Anders got up and headed for the door.

…..

"Its virtually impossible to get an appointment with the viscount," Teagan growled as he paced around the room. "And that seneschal is a pompous blowhard."

"I could go there and try to talk to either of them if you like," Elissa offered.

"Thank you Elissa but I doubt it will help. Considering some of the idle banter I've heard when looking for Alistair, a lot of people here don't believe it was a woman who ended the Blight."

"I get that all the time," Elissa laughed. "And I did have help you know."

"I don't count Loghain," Teagan said. "My brother was there. He said you brought the dragon down."

"Yes," Elissa looked away. "But there were others as well."

She had brought the dragon down but what Teagan did not know was how Loghain foiled her plan to take the final blow.

"I think I have a lead on Alistair's whereabouts," Teagan said. "I heard from one of the locals here, that a person matching his description spends his nights at the Hanged Man Tavern in Lowtown just like you mentioned this Warden saying."

"That's wonderful! That's the strongest lead we've had since coming here. The fact that another person mentioned The Hanged Man, gives me hope."

"I know," Teagan said. "I just hope his condition isn't as bad as I think it is."

"I think we should talk to Hawke," Elissa said. "Carver told me his sister has some healing abilities and associates with another apostate who is a skilled healer. She also became quite wealthy from that expedition. Perhaps her status could help you get an appointment with the viscount."

"I've seen her estate, it's actually directly across from the keep," Teagan said. "Consider how the mages are treated here, I am curious to know how she's manages to remain free."

"Carver told me his sister is quite…resourceful," Elissa said. "And look at it this way; it will be nice to deal with another Fereldan for a change instead of all these Kirkwallers."

"True," Teagan glared. "Most of the nobles I've encountered at the taverns have asked if I am going to take some of our people home."

"They feel the same way about those Qunari," Jessica said. "They're not quite as repulsive as those slavers I encountered though."

"I'm glad you dealt with them," Teagan said.

"I had no choice in the matter," Elissa said. "I caught them by surprise. I was expecting darkspawn."

"So how was the Deep Roads here?" Teagan asked. "Are there anything differences?"

"It is different. I didn't venture far but the area seems much…. older," Elissa said. "There were so many passages that lead to further into the depths but most were blocked. I mapped the area out and will go to the drop point to deliver my message so it can be sent to the Wardens."

"I didn't know the Wardens had any contacts here."

"The Wardens have contacts in every country in Thedas. Considering the there is a Deep Roads entrance here, there should be an outpost with least a half dozen Wardens."

"Are you going to mention that in your letter?"

"Yes but they likely won't listen to me," Elissa laughed.

"That's too bad," Teagan said. "They _should _listen to you."

"It's alright. I reached a point where I don't care anymore. I just consult, do what I am told, and act as a figure head."

"But you don't always do what your told," Teagan said.

"True," Elissa grinned. "They just _don't_ have to know that."

"I just want to say thank you again for staying on the ship," Teagan gave her a relieved smile. "My back has greatly improved since staying at the inn."

"I'm glad. I actually find it quite peaceful at night. There is something comforting about the sound of the water and the creaking of the ship. It helps me to…think."

"We will find him Elissa," Teagan said reassuringly. "This lead has me optimistic."

"I've decided something Teagan," Elissa said. "If Alistair doesn't appreciate my presence when we find him. I'll simply find another ship."

"You know that is _not_ going to happen," Teagan said.

"You know before the battle, I woke up and saw Duncan's shield sitting on the chair next to my bed. I stopped being angry at him the minute I discovered he left it behind," Elissa said. "I knew at that moment he no longer thought himself worthy of carrying Duncan's shield, regretted what he had done and would hate himself."

"We'll get him back Elissa," Teagan promised. "I'll be going to the Hanged Man tonight."

"I'm going to that Warden Drop location this evening; maybe I'll take a peak inside the Hanged Man…if there is a side entrance."

"You don't have to do that," Teagan said. "I understand that you wish to remain anonymous."

"I've managed to get around so far without any problems and I'll be wearing my cloak," Elissa said. "It's the only lead we've had on him. I just need to see…for myself."

…

Bodhan looked up from his dusting as Anders came in the room.

"Master Anders," Bodhan greeted. "How was your day at the clinic?"

"It was rather quiet," Anders said thoughtfully. "Just a few people needing salves and I healed a broken wrist. Are you busy? I'd like to talk to you about Elissa."  
>"She was a lovely and brave woman," Bodhan said. "And she was so good to my Sandal. But I don't need to tell you that. She conscripted you after all."<p>

"And what about Alistair?"

"Alistair was a good lad as well," Bodhan said fondly. "He was wonderful to my boy and was an excellent second to Elissa."

"Elissa told me she never considered herself leader. She and Alistair were partners. "

"They had some really…special," Bodhan said. "They used to spend their nights at camp sitting by the fire. The last time I saw Elissa was at Redcliffe before the battle. Wynne told me Elissa and Alistair had parted ways and he was leading another group. You could see the pain of Elissa's face but she soldiered on."

Anders remembered the moment he first met Elissa. He had killed the remaining darkspawn who decimated the templars that were guarding him. She did not care that he was an apostate. Her sole purpose was getting to the roof of the keep to save Seneschal Varel and anybody else she could. Afterwards, Elissa saved his life by conscripting and for awhile he found purpose helping her. She did not even blink when she killed Rylock when searching for his phylactery. Elissa believed that mages _should_ be free. As he got to know her, she was direct and to the point, but as time wore on, her defenses weakened and it was easy to see the beautiful and caring person she was.

Then there was the night at the Keep. He had wandered out of his room and heard the sound of weeping coming from her quarters. The door was unlocked and he crept inside and saw her sitting by the fire crying. She didn't even care that he intruded upon her privacy. He sat by her and cautiously put an arm around her and she leaned against him, sobbing. It was that moment he realized that Elissa was _more_ than just his commander. Take that and the Warden out and she was a woman with the weight of the world on her shoulders. Most people twice her age would crumble at being burdened with so much. She was bound to have a breaking point. He spent that whole night just listening to her talk about her family, her travels, and Alistair.

Anders reveled at the memory for that night marked one of the few unselfish moments he had during his old life. It was all about savoring his freedom back then. Elissa was the first woman he viewed as a whole person and not just a conquest.

"What are you two talking about?"

Anders turned to see Jess standing in the doorway. Dressed in black velvet breeches and a white blouse, she had her dark brown hair tied back and the gaze her dazzling blue eyes gave him felt as if reached the depths of his soul. Even after all this time, there were moments he didn't feel worthy of her. She was his now; at least for time being and he was going to embrace every moment he had with her.

"We were talking about Alistair," Anders said. "And Elissa."

"That's right!" Jessica exclaimed. "You _knew_ them."  
>"Indeed we did," Bodhan said proudly.<p>

Alistair looked at Jessica then back at Bodhan.

"You should know that Alistair is in Kirkwall," Anders said.

"By the stone!" Bodhan exclaimed. "How is the lad?"

"Bodhan," Jessica began. "Alistair is…not well I'm afraid."

"Where is he? Is there anything I can do?" Bodhan asked.

"He's developed a serious…drinking problem," Anders said. "And possibly something worse."

"We've been trying to help him," Jessica explained. "There is one thing you can do at the moment for us. Will you please open up the other wing and prepare a room?"

"A room?" Anders looked at Jessica.

"Aveline left a note for me at the keep," Jessica handed it to him. "Her guards had Alistair put in the dungeons for hitting them and…. pissing in public when we were gone. He's out now."

"Oh no," Bodhan shook his sadly. "The poor boy sounds bad off. Alistair always took the liberty of building a makeshift place for our…business. Of course I will open the wing. And I will have a room ready for him."

"Thank you," Jessica said. "It might take a couple of days of… prodding but we're going to do it."

"We better get down to the Hanged Man then," Anders said as he took Jessica's hand. "I have a feeling this will _not _be easy."

…..

Anders and Jessica found Varric sitting at a table with Donnic drinking ale and watching Alistair.

"Hey Donnic," Jessica said as she sat down. "Is Aveline still on duty?"

"The meetings she had all day kept her behind in her paperwork," Donnic replied. "She told me to tell you thank you for slaver documents and the bag of gems you left for her."

"We got her note about Alistair," Anders said as he took the mug of water from the waitress. "What happened?"

"Riley and Milo were on patrol and saw Alistair stumble out of the tavern. As he was preparing to undo his pants, Riley tried stopping him and Alistair hit her in the face and then Milo tried to stop him and he was pushed out of the way and ended up getting… pissed on. The dungeons are overcrowded so Aveline let him go with a warning."

"Sounds like there really is a story here," Varric said.

"There is," Anders said. "He considers himself a traitor for walking away from the order."

"He also thinks the love of his life is dead," Jessica added. "And he blames himself."

"Varric given the storyteller you are; I presume you've read the book on the Hero of Ferelden," Anders said.

"I read Genitivi's book. Are you saying that drunk is the _same_ Alistair who traveled with the hero?" Varric coughed.

"Yes," Anders said. "And we would appreciate you keeping this quiet for now."

"You've been holding out on me Blondie," Varric folded his arms and glared at Anders. "The next thing you are going to tell me is that you knew the Hero of Ferelden."

"She _hates_ being called that," Anders replied. "She prefers being called Elissa or Elle."

"Elissa was the one who conscripted Anders," Jessica said.

"You have been holding out on me," Varric chuckled as he took the mug from the waitress.

"Why does he think she's dead?" Donnic asked.

"Because it takes a Warden to kill an archdemon," Anders explained. "I can't go into semantics but let's just say they do not survive the experience."

"I'm beginning to understand now the self pity rhetoric he spouts now," Varric said. "Can't someone tell him that she isn't dead?"

"We need to sober him up first," Anders said. "And even then I doubt he would believe us."

"Aveline will certainly appreciate that," Donnic said as he stood up. "I'm heading out. I'm going to drag her out of her office for a bite at one of the taverns."

"Take care Donnic," Jessica said as she watched Alistair.

….

"We need to do something," Jessica said.

"I agree," Anders said. "We need to remember he was once a templar and he's also stronger than us."

"Why can't you two just do a sleep spell on him?" Varric asked.

"It's not that easy Varric," Anders said. "We also would rather _not _showcase our abilities in a public setting unless is absolutely necessary."

"This is the Hanged Man Blondie," Varric laughed. "_Nobody _cares if you are an apostate or not.

Jessica watched an unfamiliar man come in and start looking around, Wearing nobleman's attire, he had light red hair and had the same sort of facial stubble Anders had. His blue green eyes met hers briefly and widened when finding what they were looking for.

"By the Maker! Alistair!"

Jessica watched as he rushed to Alistair who recoiled when being touched.

"It is _you_."

"Go away, Teagan," Alistair growled.

"Haven't you spent enough time wallowing self pity?"

Jessica and Anders watched as Alistair opened his mouth to say something but suddenly collapsed on the ground.

"Maker!"

Anders rushed to Alistair who was now shaking violently.

"I can help him," Anders said knelt beside Teagan. "I'm a mage."

"I'm a mage as well," Jessica said as a crowd formed around him. "Varric, can you deal with the crowd?"

"Alright, go back to your regularly scheduled drinking," Varric said. "This is not the first time somebody has passed out and it certainly won't be the last."

"Thank the Maker!" Teagan exclaimed. "What's wrong with him?"

Anders was beginning to feel drained as he worked to stabilize Alistair. Jessica started to assist him and the seizing stopped.

"Will he be alright?" Teagan asked.

"He's going through withdrawal…possibly from lyrium," Anders explained.

"I wish I had gotten here sooner," Teagan said.

"So your name is Teagan?" Jessica asked.

"I am Bann Teagan Guerrin of Rainesfere," Teagan held out his hand and Jessica shook it. "Are you by chance from Ferelden? You don't sound like a Kirkwaller."

"My name is Jessica Hawke. I'm originally from Lothering. And this is Anders, my suitor and partner… among other things. The dwarf walking towards us is Varric."

"Hawke….you are the one," Teagan paused. "I believe I've passed by your estate while going to the keep. You have greenery planted around it."

"That's the one," Jessica said.

"He's stable for now," Anders said. "We need to get him to bed."

"He's in _no_ condition to go to the ship," Teagan said. "I guess I can get another room at the inn."

"He certainly can't stay here," Jessica said. "Let's get him to the estate. I have plenty of room for the both of you."

"Are you sure its no trouble?" Teagan asked.

"Bann Teagan," Jessica said. "We've been trying to help Alistair when he…let us. Had we realized how extreme the situation was, we would have done a lot _more_."

"What Jess is trying to say is we have plenty of room," Anders said. "And if he is going through withdrawal, I need a quiet place for him."

"Thank you," Teagan said appreciatively. "I should have known that it would be two Fereldens who would be so gracious."

"I'll get a wagon to help you bring him up," Varric said.

"Thank you Varric," Jessica said.

"He's sleeping now," Anders said. "I need to go to his room after we get him in the wagon. I want to see what he's been taking because it's obvious his problem goes way past drinking."

"Thank you again," Teagan said gratefully. "One of my guards is outside waiting. He'll be able to help us."

"I'll go get him," Jessica turned towards the door as Anders and Teagan each grabbed one of Alistair's arms and lifted him up.

"Teagan," Alistair mumbled.

"I'm here Alistair," Teagan grimaced.

"I don't think he's bees very often," Anders said.

"Teagan, I need…to know," Alistair said as fought to stay awake.

"What is it Alistair?"

"Please," Alistair whispered. "Wherever she's buried, place some roses at her grave for me."

"She's not dead," Teagan tapped Alistair's face but he had drifted back to sleep.

…..

Elissa watched the man standing by entrance to the Hanged Man.

"Can't let you in," He growled. "Use the other entrance."

"Will this gold change your mind?" Elissa held out two sovereigns which the man eagerly took.

"Thank you Serah," He said. "Let me open the door for you."

"You are too kind," Elissa said sarcastically as she went inside.

She was not surprised by the smell of cheap ale, vomit, and sweat that lingered in the air. Making her way to the front of the tavern, she watched the crowd standing by the entrance and a dwarf chastising them.

"What is it with all you?" He chuckled. "You're acting like you've never seen someone carried out of here."

Elissa watched the dwarf as he sat back down at his table. He was the first clean shaven dwarf she had ever seen and his appearance fascinated her.

"Would you like something?"

She looked up to see a waitress staring at her.

"Give me a mug of one of your best ales," Elissa whispered and handed her a silver coin.

"It won't be the best," The waitress laughed. "But it won't be watered down either."

Elissa made sure the hood of her cloak was masking her face as the waitress handed her mug.

"Thank you."

Elissa began to worry about Teagan. She had expected to find him here but he was nowhere to be found unless there were tables set up upstairs she was not aware about.  
>Closing her eyes she took a sip and was surprised to find it drinkable.<p>

Suddenly sense the presence of another Warden, she blew the candle out and looked to entrance and saw the door open.

Elissa nearly dropped her mug and gasped when seeing Anders walk to where the dwarf was sitting.

It had been nearly five years since she last saw him. And he looked relatively the same except for the stubble on his face and his coat did look like it had seen better days.

"How's Alistair?" Varric asked?

"He's still asleep," Anders said. "Teagan and Jess are on their way to the estate. Help me search his room Varric. I need to know if he's taking something.

Varric got up and as Anders followed him to the room, he stopped and looked directly at her.

Elissa got up from her chair and fled to the back exit.

….

Anders ran down the hall and opened the door but only found the man standing by outside.

"Where did that woman go?" Anders asked.

Looking towards the direction the man pointed to, Anders shook his head and went inside.

There was no denying it, that woman was Elissa. As for her fleeing, he could only reason that she was in shock by encountering him.

Recalling Teagan's awkward pause when Jessica told him her name, Anders began to suspect a connection. His main focus was helping Alistair though but vowed to get to the bottom of it once he recovered.

"Hey Blondie," Varric called. "What are you waiting for?"

"I'm coming," Anders turned and headed up the stairs.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Anders found Varric holding his nose as he came in Alistair's room and immediately grimaced when the odor hit him.

"This room makes the rest of the Hanged Man smell like a flowering meadow," Varric choked.

The smells of old ale, piss, and vomit swirled around him as he stepped over the bottles and clothes that were strewn about.

"And is that cheese supposed to be green?" Varric pointed to the moldy cheese wheel that was sitting on the table. "What are we looking for exactly?"

"Lyrium vials," Anders said. "And anything that looks suspicious."

"Well, the man must have certainly lost his mind considering he left his coin purse here," Varric shook his head and pointed to it.

Anders picked up the purse and while it was heavy it felt as if it was filled with sand.

"Dear Maker," Anders let out a moan when opening the purse and pouring some of it in his hands. The sandy grittiness made him realize that Alistair was snorting Olyraum which was a combination of Lyrium and Orchalcum. It was developed for templar use when lyrium supplies were low but the combination brought dangerous mood swings and proved _more_ addictive than lyrium. The Chantry soon banned it but it was a well known to be easy to make and sell.

"I found some lyrium bottles!' Varric said as held up two bottles.

"Alistair has been snorting Olyrum," Anders put the purse in his pocket. "Is the Coterie making Olyrum Varric?"

"Blondie the Coterie is not in the business of manufacturing," Varric laughed.

"But they could be selling it and I need you to make some inquiries," Anders folded his arms. "If Alistair got it, it means some of the templars are likely using this and that's something the mages do _not_ need."

"I'll have my contacts on this," Varric promised. "And I'll have one of the waitress's pack what is salvageable and send it to Hawke's. Is he going to make it?"

"Yes, but given how much he's neglected himself its going to be a very painful withdrawal."

"You better hope Hawke has a lot of extra sheets," Varric cringed.

….

Jessica held the door open as Teagan and his guard dragged Alistair inside.

"Bhodan!"

Bhodan and Orana came running down the stairs and towards them.

"By the Stone!" Bhodan exclaimed. "Alistair!"

"Enchantment?" Sandal looked up from what he was working on and rushed to Alistair.

"I don't believe this," Teagan's eyes widened. "Bhodan?"

"It's good to see you Bann Teagan," Bhodan bowed. "Though I wish it were under better circumstances."

"Yes," Teagan agreed.

"Bhodan, did you make up that room?" Jessica asked. "I'm going to need you to make up another for Bann Teagan."

"Yes Messere. We'll immediately get the other one ready for the bann."

"Thank you," Jessica said between breaths. "I don't know what I would do without you and Orana. Expect a _big _bonus in your pay."

Jessica watched as Sandal touched Alistair and he opened his eyes looking at him.

"Sa…Sandal?"

"Enchantment!"

"Don't look at me," Alistair struggled with Teagan and his guard. "I am nothing… but… a worthless… traitor!"

A few moments later he drifted off.

"Lets get him to the room," Jessica went upstairs as Teagan and the guard followed.

…

Twenty minutes later, Jessica led Teagan and his guard downstairs.

"David, would you go to the inn to get my things? I'm paid through the week; just give the innkeeper my regards."

"Of course my lord," David bowed. "I shall be back shortly."

"I'm sure you can use a drink after that," Jessica said.

"Indeed," Teagan said as he sat down. "I could use _more_ than one actually."

"Port? Brandy? What would you like?"

"Brandy. Please."

Anders came in the room as Jessica handed Teagan the glass."

"How is Alistair?"

"He's asleep," Jessica said as Anders sat next to her. "He came to and got upset when seeing Sandal. His arms are restrained to the bedposts."

"Good, because I found out what he's been taking," Anders pulled out purse and dumped the contents on the table. "We found a few lyrium vials but he's been snorting Olyrum."

"Isn't that banned by the chantry?" Teagan asked. "Will he be alright?"

"It is banned," Anders poured a glass of water from the pitcher and took a sip. "And he will be alright…once he gets it out of his body. Considering how he has been drinking, it's _not_ going to be easy."

"What is Olyrum?" Jessica asked.

"Templars used to mix Orchalcum and lyrium together and let it crystallize. They used it when their lyrium supplies were short. It has a similar effect but causes severe mood swings. It was eventually banned."

"Dear Maker," Teagan shook his head. "We didn't get here in time."

Anders gave me Teagan a weird look before setting his glass down.

"The Wardens forbid Olyrum except for certain potions," Anders cast a brief glance at Teagan as Jessica leaned against him."

"Wardens?" Teagan looked at Anders.

"Anders was conscripted by the Hero of Ferelden," Jessica said.

"I think Teagan _knows_ Elissa," Anders looked at Teagan. "She traveled with Alistair to Redcliffe seeking his brother's aid and helped Teagan when there was this _pesky_ little situation involving a demon and the undead."

"Yes…I do… know her," Teagan stammered before recovering. "She…saved my family. If you are a Grey Warden, how come you are not with them?"

"Anders has abilities that are needed _here_," Jessica said. "He actually is responsible for aiding all the Ferelden refugees in Darktown at his clinic there."

"It's good to know that our people have you and Anders to help them," Teagan took a long sip of brandy before setting his glass down. "So what is Alistair's prognosis? Will he be alright?"

"He's going to have a very painful withdrawal and it's only going to be more difficult because of his drinking," Anders felt Jessica lean against him and he put his arm around her. "He'll be fine physically but…"

"He thinks she's dead," Jessica closed her eyes and sighed.

"What?" Teagan knocked the empty glass over.

"We've been trying to help Alistair," Jessica said. "When he let us near him."

"Elissa told me what happened when I was under her command back in Amaranthine," Anders said. "Jessica and I took it upon ourselves to look out for him as best we could. Apparently we didn't do a good enough job considering his addiction."

"It's _not_ your fault," Teagan said reassuringly. "Alistair has always had a lack of self worth that goes back to his upbringing. That blame goes to my brother who raised him until he was ten before shipping him off to the templars to placate his vapid shrew of a wife."

"He's no longer a templar at least," Anders tried to hide the bitterness in his voice. "How long are you planning to stay? Alistair is in no condition for a boat trip at the moment."

"My ship is undergoing repairs right now. The captain has not been able to estimate the time they will done because they're waiting for some materials."

"Are you referring to that big ship that needed three docking spaces?" Jessica brightened. "I have a friend who has been drooling at that ship."

"Yes," Teagan nodded. "That's the Rowan, named after my sister. Take all the time you need. We want him well."

"We?" Anders asked.

"Of course we want him well," Jessica smiled. "Make yourself at home. If I am not around, Bhodan and Orana will attend to your needs."

"Thank you," Teagan sighed. "I won't forget your graciousness."

"It's my pleasure," Jessica got up. "There were a few times I saw the real Alistair come out. He helped a lot of people during the night that big storm hit."

"He even comforted some children," Anders said as he got up.

"He's always had a good heart," Teagan said.

"Since he's sleeping at the moment, I am going to my clinic to pick up some things that I will need," Anders put his arms around Jessica and kissed her. "Tell Orana to cook that soup of hers and make sure there are extra linens in Alistair's room."

"I will," Jessica kissed him back.

"I need to go to my ship and let Captain Harris know where I will be," Teagan said. "I'll leave once David returns."

"You can set your belongings in the hall," Jessica said as picked up the empty glasses. "I'll have Bhodan bring them to your room."

"Thank you Jessica," Teagan got up from the chair. "I'll wait outside for David."

"I'll wait with you," Anders said.

….

"Alright Bann Teagan," Anders folded his arms. "I _know_ she traveled with you."

"I don't know what you are talking about." Teagan glared defiantly.

"I saw Elissa in the Hanged Man, just as you left. I saw her and she saw me. I think she overheard me talking about Alistair's condition because she ran back toward the back entrance and disappeared."

Teagan's silence made the realization more clear that Elissa was in Kirkwall.

"Bann Teagan," Anders began. "Elissa and I became close friends in Amaranthine. I _know _you are going to your ship to tell her about Alistair. _Please_ tell her to come to my clinic in Darktown."

"I was never good at lying," Teagan sighed. "You and Jessica have done so much and I believe Elissa could use a friend right now."

"Thank you," Anders smiled.

"I suppose since it was Jessica's brother who mentioned Alistair that it's only right she knows as well."

"I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that Elissa would know Carver. I will tell Jess tomorrow. She will keep Elissa's presence a secret," Anders promised.

"I best be off then."

Anders watched as Teagan met up with his guard who handed him his bag. He opened the door and set it inside then left with his guard to head to the ship.

As he made his way towards Darktown, so many thoughts raced through his mind that it became difficult to tell which one were his and Justice's. It didn't matter. He was going to see one of the few people that ever mattered to him.

….

Elissa paced back and forth on the deck. Her heart ached, knowing something had happened to Alistair but seeing Anders completely threw her.

From what little she gathered, he was helping Alistair and as overwhelmed as she felt, it was also a relief to know he was being cared for by someone she trusted.

Elissa whirled around when hearing the door open and practically pounced on Teagan.

"How is he? I came in the tavern just as you left."

"One of your… Warden friends are caring for him along with Jessica Hawke," Teagan sat down on one of the chairs.

"I know," Elissa tried to keep her composure as she saw the concern in Teagan's eyes. "I saw him after you left and he saw me. I overhead something mentioned about Alistair's condition. What happened?"

Elissa sat down in the chair next to Teagan who took her hand.

"What you heard about his drinking was true but there is something else. He is addicted to Olyrum."

"Oh Maker!" Elissa slumped in her chair. "The Wardens in Orlais had to deal with a recruit that had that addiction."

"Anders said he will recover but it's _not_ going to be easy. There's something else though," Teagan said. "Alistair apparently thinks…you're dead."

"No!"

Elissa got up and frantically paced around, "He must have encountered some Wardens during his travels and overheard what happens to the one who kills the archdemon. This is so much _worse_ than I thought."

"Alistair is a _grown man_ Elissa," Teagan said firmly. "You can't take _responsibility_ for his actions."

"I know. I just wish…"

"You have another chance now Elissa."

"But he's going to feel even worse after he recovers."

"Maybe he needs to."

"You certainly are a lot harder on him than me."

"My brother certainly did _not _do Alistair any favors." Teagan groused. "And I regret that I was not there _enough_ for him. He should have _never _been sent to the chantry. That's Eamon's way of not wanting to deal with things. As heartbreaking as it was to send Connor to the Circle, I know he's not only getting magical training there, he's getting educated. Connor is getting more direction there than he ever would by his parents. Alistair _needs _learn that his actions have consequences. He needs the direction a proper upbringing should have given him. You started him on that path and he needs to go back to it. "

"You sound bitter."

"Maybe I am," Teagan sighed. "All I know is Bella and I will _never _raise our children that way."

"Of course you won't," Elissa gave him a weary smile. "You are not your brother."

"There are some other things else you should know."

"What?"

"Remember Bhodan and Sandal?" Teagan asked. "They are _living _with Jessica and Anders. Bhodan is apparently her butler and Sandal is as…odd as ever."

"By the void!" Elissa stood up from her chair. "Carver didn't mention that. That must have happened after he left with the Wardens. He _never _mentioned Anders either."

"Your friend Anders and Jessica appear to be very…close."

"That's certainly _not_ the Anders I knew back in Amaranthine," Elissa laughed. "I guess I am going to have to talk to him."

"That's the other thing I needed to tell you," Teagan looked at Elissa. "Anders requested that you come to his clinic in Darktown tonight."

"Then I guess I better head there," Elissa sighed. "I'm sure one of the denizens there will show me the way."

"I'll be staying at the estate to help with Alistair," Teagan said.

"I'm glad. Jessica Hawke is very gracious to do this. As much as I enjoy my anonymity, I am looking forward to meeting her."  
>"I better get back to the estate."<p>

"I'll talk to you _soon _then," Elissa touched his shoulder. "Thank you."

…..

Anders took a deep breath and sat on the cot. There were three people waiting for him when he arrived. He gave one person a salve and sent him off but the others both had broken bones which drained most of his mana. The one with the broken rib was particularly draining, forcing him to sit as he packed a bag of potions that he would bring back to the estate.

It had been a couple of hours since he'd spoken to Teagan. Elissa _should_ be here. Justice stirred anxiously within him for he wanted to see her as well. Closing his eyes he silently implored Justice not to come out.

"I need to see her first. I need to find the _right_ moment."

Suddenly he sensed the same presence he felt that night of the storm and then heard the sound of footsteps.

Standing up, he slowly turned around and found Elissa standing a few feet from him. A weary smile formed on her lips as their eyes met.

"Hello Anders."

...


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Anders could feel his heart beating erratically as he looked at her. While Elissa was still as beautiful as he remembered, a permanent weariness seemed to be etched into her features and her once vibrant green eyes had dimmed somewhat.

"Aren't you going to say anything? Is Alistair alright? Please, tell me," Elissa pleaded.

"Shut up," Anders threw his arms around her and sighed when feeling her embrace him back. "Alistair is going to be fine. I've _never_ let you down in the past and I'm _not_ going to now. He's sleeping _now_ and when I get back to the estate, we'll begin treating him."

"I'm glad he's in good hands," Elissa let out a sigh and loosened her grip on him. "And it's good to see you too."

"I…never thought I would see you again."

"And Carver didn't tell me about you," Elissa sat down on the cot next to Anders.

"You know Carver?" Anders exclaimed. "Wait! Of course you would know Carver. He's a Warden now. It's beginning to be clear now. He mentioned Alistair and you put the pieces together. I'm _not_ surprised he didn't mention me. Carver and I were not exactly…pals."

"And I thought it was only his sister that was the reason he had problems getting along with the mage Wardens when I visited the compound in Nevarra," Elissa laughed softly. "That soon changed after his very first encounter with a broodmother though. He headed straight to the healer after that."

"It's amazing how seeing a broodmother for the first time can change one's perspective," Anders laughed.

"I had a few talks with him before I left," Elissa said as she played with the pendant she was wearing. "During one talk he casually mentioned The Hanged Man and talked about this drunk claiming to be the Prince of Ferelden and when he mentioned Alistair's name, I just _knew_ it was him."

"And so you decided to take that gamble and come here," Anders said.

"I learned about Alistair about six months ago," Elissa explained. "I wanted to go then but I had to fulfill some obligations to the Wardens and then I realized it was best to _not_ get them involved so I enlisted Teagan."

"You were the one I saw here during the storm," Anders realized. "I saw you leave the Kirkwall one night too. You also killed some slavers."

"I see _no _point in remaining neutral when it comes to slavers," Elissa shrugged. "I caught them by surprise."

"It's nice to see you _not_ follow the Warden line," Anders grinned.

"The Wardens let me do what I want for the most part," Elissa smiled. "They know I can't be controlled. I've spent the last few years visiting the various compounds and when I haven't been traveling, I've been in Ferelden helping my brother and such."

Anders closed his eyes and went back to the weekend Elissa took him to Highever Castle where they spent two glorious days forgetting they were Wardens. Fergus was a gracious host and Anders marveled at how close he was to Elissa. As a Warden, Elissa had given up her title but she _never_ gave up her family.

"How is Fergus?" Anders asked.

"Fergus has remarried," Elissa smiled. "Her name is Charlotte and she is a wonderful woman. Her first husband was killed in the Blight. Fergus adopted her little girl and she gave birth to a son recently."

"That's wonderful news Ellie," Anders smiled. "I always liked Fergus. It gladdens my heart to know he's found happiness again."

"I saw my nephew come into the world Anders," Elissa wiped the tears from her eyes, "And I got to bring him to Fergus. It's a memory I will always cherish."

Anders watched Elissa wiped her tears and regain her composure and decided then he would have to wait before telling her about Justice.

"I understand," Anders squeezed her hand. "I've delivered six babies since I have been here."

"So this is your clinic?"

"I know it's _not _the prettiest place, but it's clean and this is the only refuge Ferelden refugees can go to when they need help."

"Then you are doing a _wonderful_ thing," Elissa said. "By the way, I visited Felsi before coming here and I saw Ser Pounce-a-lot. I am so sorry they made you get rid of him and I am sorry for leaving."

"It's _not_ your fault Ellie," Anders said reassuringly. "It was _not _the same when you left. It got too rigid."

"I just was _not _cut out to be Warden Commander and arlessa at the same time," Elissa sighed. "And I was _not_ going to give up seeing my brother."

"I miss Ser Pounce –a-lot," Anders sighed

"He sired some kittens with another stray that wandered on the farm. I got to pick one out for my niece."

"I'm glad he's doing well. How is Felsi?"

"Felsi's doing great," Elissa said. "She married another surfacer recently."

"I bet Oghren loved that," Anders laughed.

"He's pretty much accepted it," Elissa said. "He's been on the surface for nearly five years. He's not like how you remember him. Felsi lets him visit his daughter whenever he wants and he is happy with that."

"It's good to know he's making an effort."

"I heard about Kristoff from Aura," Elissa said. "I put flowers on his grave. I hope Justice is at peace wherever he is."

Anders felt Justice stirring inside him and he struggled to remain in control.

"Are you alright?" Elissa looked at him worriedly. "You look very pale."

"I'm just tired," Anders gave her a weary smile. "I could say the same about you."

"Another effect of the taint," Elissa laughed.

"How much sleep have you been getting?"

"I manage a good three to five hours on the ship," Elissa covered her mouth as she yawned. "In Ferelden, I get about six. The nightmares haven't been that bad until coming here and most of the time I can block them out."

"Being with Jess has helped with the nightmares," Anders smiled.

"Teagan mentioned the two you were…close. I have to admit I was surprised by that."

"I'm _not_ the same person I was in Amaranthine," Anders looked up at her. "And I owe you for that."

"And what did I do to promote this…change?" Elissa looked surprised by his revelation.

"It was all those talks we had," Anders proclaimed. "The things you shared with me about your time traveling and how you fell in love with Alistair. You told me he gave you the strength to go on. You said he completed you. I _never_ understood that until I met Jess. You were right. Having someone to love, and who loves and supports you back…there is no feeling to describe it."

"Wow! You have changed. I'm looking forward to meeting Jess."

"I'm looking forward to you meeting her," Anders smiled.

"Where was her mother when Alistair was brought in? Carver told me she lived with his sister."

Anders let out a heavy sigh and looked away, "Their mother was murdered six months ago."

"Oh Maker!" Elissa stood up and paced around then looked at Anders. "What happened?"

"She was killed by a blood mage who was trying to recreate his dead wife. We… didn't get there in time. Jess's mother died in her arms and she still hasn't gotten over it. We've always tried to look out for Alistair but after her mother's death she took it upon herself to really try to help him when he…let her."

"And I thought knowing you, Bhodan and Sandal would be the only things we had in common," Elissa sighed and looked away. "My heart goes out to her."

"I know you of all people would understand what she's going through."

"I do," Elissa said softly.

"Then maybe when you two finally meet, you can talk to her," Anders said hopefully.

"Considering how kind and generous she's been, of course I will," Elissa promised. "Carver didn't have the best relationship with his sister did he?"

"Why?" Anders could feel his anger stir. "What did he say?"

"Carver talked about growing up surrounded by magic and how he felt like he _never _belonged," Elissa said. "And he's still harbors some bitterness on how he was forced to become a Warden because of the corruption sickness."

"Carver is a sanctimonious prig," Anders declared. "He was an excellent warrior when he wasn't whining about always being in Jess's shadow. He insisted on going to the Deep Roads with us. After what happened, Jessica found an application to join the templars when she packed his things. He would have become a templar just to _spite_ her."

"Well he's an excellent Warden and I definitely see him becoming commander in the future," Elissa said.

"I knew he would be a good Warden."

"Shouldn't you be heading back to the estate?"

"I am and you are coming with me," Anders said firmly. "I don't expect you to come in but you should at least know where it is."

"I know it's across from the Keep," Elissa said.

"Yes it is but you are still going with me."

"Alright," Elissa sighed. "Even after all this time I still can't say no to you."

"But you have said no to me in the past," Anders's eyes glinted mischievously.

"Does Jessica Hawke know how incorrigible you are?" Elissa chuckled.

"Yes," Anders laughed. "Now let's go."

…..

"You love him," Anders broke the silence as they walked through Hightown. "And you want him back."

"I'm tired of being alone Anders," Elissa said. "And there has never been anyone else. Alistair will always have my heart even if never wants to see me again."

"Ellie he thinks you're dead," Anders said gently. "This goes beyond leaving before the Blight."

"Its so much _worse_ than I thought," Elissa agonized. "You remember how I told you how I woke up before the battle and found his shield on the chair by my bed? I knew then he regretted what he did but would be too proud to admit it. I also knew his actions would destroy him."

"You are _not_ to blame for what he did or for everything that's happened to him," Anders stopped and grabbed her shoulders. "You saved his life by that decision as well as your own. He needs to take _responsibility_ for his actions after he recovers."

"Teagan said basically the same thing," Elissa sighed.

"You need to _listen_ to us then," Anders said.

They continued to walk in silence until Anders slowed down.

"This is it," Anders stopped by an estate that was covered in ivy and was surrounded by other shrubbery and other plants.

"I have to say I was shocked to hear that Bodhan and Sandal were living at the estate. It's such an odd coincidence."

"They were part of the expedition," Anders explained. "We actually had to look for Sandal when he got lost and found him near all these darkspawn corpses. And there was this ogre that had been literally made frozen."

"That sounds similar to how I found him at Fort Drakon. He was all bloodied and surrounded by corpses."

Suddenly the door flew open and Sandal rushed out.

"Enchantment!"

He threw his arms around Elissa who smiled and knelt down before embracing him back.

"Hello Sandal, it's so good to see you."

"Sandal we have to be quiet," Anders said gently.

"They went to bed," Sandal said.

"Maker!" Elissa's eyes widened. "You can talk."

"Yes," Anders laughed. "A lot of what he says is mostly…nonsensical but he can speak."

"You look sad," Sandal looked up at her.

"I'm just tired Sandal," Elissa kissed him on the cheek before standing up.

"Sandal is going to help me with Alistair," Anders said.

"Enchantment!" Sandal clapped his hands and nodded.

"We better go in." Anders said. "Please. Come by _tomorrow._ I can't keep this from Jess."

"I _know_." Elissa sighed. "I'll come, but it will be in the evening when I do."

"Don't go," Sandal tugged at her hand.

"She'll be back tomorrow Sandal," Anders said.

"I'll be back tomorrow Sandal and I will bring you something to enchant."

"Take care of Alistair," Elissa said as she hugged Anders.

"I will," Anders promised. "And you better take of yourself. Go get some sleep."

Anders and Sandal watched as she turned around and slowly walked away.

"Sandal, would go down to the basement and fetch me two containers, pails, whatever you can find."

Sandal nodded eagerly and headed back inside.

Anders sighed and shook his head wondering how long Sandal's enthusiasm would last when seeing what would be happening to Alistair as he begins to recover.

…

Jessica came out of the room as Anders was about to enter Alistair's rooms.

"You're back."

"How is he?"

"He's asleep," Jessica sighed. "He's starting to sweat though. I used a spell on him to keep him cool."

"His withdrawal is starting."

"Teagan settled in for the night, do you need me to stay up with you?"

"Get a couple of hours a sleep," Anders kissed her.

"Alright. I set extra sheets and towels in his room."

"Thank you love," Anders said as he gave her a final kiss and watched her head to their bedroom.

…

Alistair was snoring loudly as Anders entered the room. He was covered in sweat and stirred when feeling the hand on his forehead.

"Wake up Alistair."

Alistair opened his eyes and looked up at Anders and started to struggle.

"You can go ahead and try," Anders laughed. "Teagan and Jess did a wonderful job with those restraints."

"Release me!" Alistair roared as Anders temporarily paralyzed his legs.

"You won't be able run, but you'll be able to sit up and bend over when you need to," Alistair pulled a vial from his pack.

Anders watched with fascination as a vein bulged in Alistair's neck and a bead of sweat rolled down his cheek.

"You are _not _going to break me mage," Alistair spat.

It was at that moment Anders's body shook and Justice took control.

"I should kill you _now_," Justice lunged for Alistair. "You are _not_ worthy of her but I owe a debt to the Warden and I shall aid Anders in his quest to cure you."

Anders stumbled back as Justice went dormant and saw that Alistair had fainted from the encounter.

He opened Alistair's mouth and poured the vial down his throat, rubbing his throat to force a swallow.

Alistair opened his eyes and coughed and looked at Anders.

"What was that?"

"A hallucination," Anders lied.

"Enchantment."

Anders turned to see Sandal holding an old cooking pot in one hand and a pail in the other.

"Just in time! Thank you Sandal," Anders took the cooking pot and set it on the bed as Sandal set the pail down and plopped himself on the bed.

"What did you give me?" Alistair shook violently as Anders undid the restraints.

"You've poisoned yourself Alistair, its needs to be purged from you."

"You bastard! You….," Anders grimaced and pulled Sandal away as Alistair's stomach made a horrible gurgling sound and an inhuman groan came out of him.

Anders watched as Alistair hurriedly sat up and embraced the pot before vomiting into it. He collapsed back on the bed as Anders took the pot.

"I can't heal you until you get it all out Alistair."

"Just…let me die."

"No!"

"Why are you doing this? You don't know me."

"I know you _more_ than you think," Anders pulled the chair close to the bed and sat down. "And your time of wallowing in _self__-__loathing has come to an end. She __needs__ you. And you need to man up!"_

_ "Pot!"_

_ Anders handed him the pot and turned his head as Alistair heaved into it._

_ "Sandal, will you get me a pitcher of water?" _

_ "Enchantment!" Sandal nodded and ran out of the room._

_ Alistair was breathing heavily against the pillows, and the sweat was pouring out of him._

_ "It hurts."_

_ "That's what you get for snorting _Olyrum and when you get better you are going to tell me where you got it."

"It makes me forget what I've done. It makes me see her."

"You bloody idiot!" Anders jumped on the bed and grabbed Alistair by his shirt. "She's alive! And for the love of the Maker, I don't know why but she's forgiven you."

He looked at Alistair and saw his eyes were closed. He didn't even hear him.

Sitting back down, he closed his eyes and enjoyed the brief respite.

…..

Jessica found Teagan sitting in the dining room drinking tea.

"Good morning," Jessica sat down. "I trust you slept well."

"I did thank you," Teagan smiled. "It was much more comfortable than the inn.

"I'm glad."

"How's Alistair?"

"I sat with him earlier while Anders was cleaning up. He's sleeping now. He did a lot of….purging last night and is exhausted."

"And he still has a bit more to go."

Jessica turned and saw Anders standing in the doorway.

"Good morning," Anders sat down next to Jessica giving her a kiss before glancing at Teagan who gave him a quick nod.

"How is he doing?" Elissa filled Anders cup and set it down.

"He's asleep," Anders said as he filled his plate. "Sandal is asleep on the chair beside him."

"He's been so kind to him," Jessica smiled. "Such a sweet boy."

"I saw Elissa last night Jess," Anders looked at her.

"She's _here_?" Jessica dropped her fork.

"I'm sorry for not telling you sooner," Teagan said apologetically. "Elissa is a very private person and given what she's done for me, I owe it to her to keep her anonymity."

"I understand," Jessica said. "I've had people come out of the woodwork wanting to be my friend since I've gotten wealthy and there are times I wish I could sink back into the shadows."

"Elissa said she would come by to the estate tonight," Anders said.

"That's wonderful news!" Jessica exclaimed.

"Indeed," Teagan sighed. "You've certainly did a better job convincing her than I would have."

"Elissa found out about Alistair when meeting your brother," Anders reached for her hand. "Carver mentioned him when talking about his life in Kirkwall.

"She met him? Does he know about Mother?"

"I'm sorry Jess," Anders looked at her sadly. "It was about six months ago."

"Will you excuse me for a moment," Jessica got out of her chair and hurriedly left the room.

"Jessica's mother was murdered six months ago. It's still very painful for her."

"I'm sorry," Teagan said. "And with her brother being a Grey Warden, it's obvious it hasn't been easy for her."

"She hides it well," Anders said. "But it hasn't been easy for her. Fortunately she has many friends who love and support her."

"And you," Teagan added.

"Yes," Anders admitted with an embarrassed smile.

"I'm really curious to know how you two have avoided the Gallows," Teagan set down his cup. "I've only been there twice and each time its chilled me to the bone. I have a nephew in the Circle at Ferelden and would _never_ want to see him here."

"Believe me Teagan, since coming here its made me take back every horrible thing I said about Ferelden's Circle."

"I'm not really a religious person. The Chantry's stance on mages is outdated in my opinion. You, Jessica and my nephew have been blessed with extraordinary abilities. You help people. I see _no_ reason to fear mages."

"Teagan, you are obviously a man _ahead_ of your time, if more people shared your opinion….the situation here would not be as… precarious. As for Jessica and I; her wealth and our reputation for helping people with various…matters have kept us safe."

"I see," Teagan smiled knowingly.

Anders gave Teagan a weary grin as he ate. He was pleasantly surprised at how easy going Teagan was. There was no jealously or disdain. Teagan looked beyond the fact he was a mage and treated him like a man.

Anders could honestly say he liked Teagan and wished there were _more _like him.

"So give it to me straight Anders," Teagan set his fork down. "Will he recover from this?"

"He will recover physically but the emotional scars will take longer."

"For _both_ of them," Teagan sighed.

Anders nodded at Teagan and continued to eat.

…

Elissa stood patiently as the leathersmith took her measurements as his assistant inspected the torn armor she brought for repair.

"Its an honor to be repairing this for you Warden," the dwarf's hand shook slightly as he wrote down her measurements.

"There will be extra gold if you repair it quickly," Elissa said as she watched the various mages wander about as the templars looked on. "I'd appreciate it being delivered to the ship I'm staying on. The Rowan. If I'm not there just give to Captain Harris."

"You can expect it by tomorrow evening. I'll get to work on it immediately."

"Thank you."

Elissa hated the new Warden armor she was wearing. The First Warden said the Wardens needed something to make them standout so sanctioned armor was created for every class. While she could not deny the attractiveness of the armor, wearing it diminished her anonymity. She loved wearing the armor her brother had made for her and enjoyed breaking the rules when she wore it. On the leather pauldrons where her family's crest was emblazoned, there was a griffon directly under it. The Wardens wanted her to forget where she came from and didn't seem to understand that she would not be who she was if it had not been for her family.

"Andraste's grace! Its _you_."

Elissa turned to see the templar staring at her with the same sort of awe that always makes her want to flee.

And then it came to her, this was the templar they encountered at Ferelden's circle.

"I'm not surprised that you don't remember me," The templar laughed nervously.

"You were at the Circle in Ferelden. I'm sorry I don't remember your name."

"Cullen. Knight-Captain Cullen," He held his hand and Elissa shook it. "What brings you to Kirkwall, Warden?"

"I was sent to map the Deep Roads here and I am awaiting further…orders."

"It's a shame our Knight Commander is out of town inspecting our outposts. I know she would definitely take time out of her schedule and have a meeting with you. I think you could better explain why you refused to annul the Circle "

"I'm going to be here for awhile Captain," Elissa smiled. "I'm staying on the Rowan in case she has time for a meeting but I really have no desire to answer for a decision I made years ago. The mages I commanded in the final battle served _valiantly_ and that's _all that matters_."

"Of course," Cullen said nervously.

As Elissa was about to say something, a templar that had walked by them suddenly shook violently as the mage he was escorting cowered. Suddenly he unsheathed his sword and aimed at the crying woman.

"I can sense the demon in you," He growled at the woman. "I can save your soul."

"Please," the woman crawled back towards Elissa and hid behind her.

"Stand down Jason," Cullen commanded.

"No!"

Elissa watched as the templar removed his helmet and saw his face was bathed in sweat.

"Stand _down_," Cullen repeated as the man forgot the woman and lunged for Elissa. "Wardens consort with evil."

Elissa unsheathed her weapons and managed to block his blow. The templar utilized his smite ability and which flung her back several feet.

As she regained her senses and ran back to the man, he collapsed to the ground and convulsed violently as a crowd formed around him.

Blood spewed from his nose as he continued to shake but suddenly he was still and Cullen closed his eyes.

"I want everyone to disperse _now_!" Cullen ordered before turning to Elissa.

"What in the Maker!"

"I'm so sorry Warden," Cullen said apologetically. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine Knight-Captain Cullen, what in the Maker is going on?"

"I don't know but I promise I will get to the bottom of it," Cullen said. "Will you please excuse me?"

"Of course."

Elissa watched as Cullen directed the templars to pick up the body as the others lead the mages away.

Turning towards the cowering mage, she held out her hand and helped the woman up and was horrified to see her appearance close up. The woman's cheeks were gaunt and her hair prematurely gray and stringy. Her sunken eyes were cloudy and haunted and only showed a spark of surprise that she was being helped.

"Are you alright?"

The mage blinked away a few tears and brushed the dirt off her robes.

"I'm sorry, but if I speak to you I will get whipped."

Elissa turned and watched the woman walk away then turned to head back to the ship to relax a bit before going to the estate. As much as she wanted to focus on Alistair, she knew that Anders would have to know about this.

….

"Will Elissa mind Sandal waiting outside for her?" Jessica asked as she paced around the entry.

"No," Anders laughed. "They apparently had a special friendship."

"I didn't know Bodhan was a merchant," Teagan said. "I thought he was your butler."

"He has a hireling that sells his wares," Anders explained.

"Bodhan is at a Merchant Guild's meeting, helping one of our friends," Jessica explained.

"I'm surprised Varric has gotten away with this for as long as he had," Anders yawned.

It had been a tiring day dealing with Alistair. He had thrown up and off throughout the day and endured a bad bout of the shakes. He was asleep now; his exhaustion at being sick and fighting with them had taken their toll.

"Sandal!"

Anders watched the door fly open as he breezed through the room, holding Elissa's hand.

"Enchantment!" He exclaimed.

"You're here," Anders stood up and walked towards her as Jessica and Teagan followed.

"You know I always keep my word Anders," Elissa smiled and looked at Jessica. "And you must Jessica, the woman who stole this incorrigible man's heart."  
>"Yes," Jessica said nervously as she held out her hand. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Elissa. Anders told me a great deal about you."<p>

"It's wonderful to meet you too Jessica," Elissa shook her hand. "I must say you are a far cry from what your brother described."

"My brother and I did not have the best relationship," Jessica said embarrassingly.

"Well, let me just say that I for one appreciate you getting into my business," Elissa smiled. "Words cannot convey my gratitude for you helping Alistair."

"I'm happy to help," Jessica said as she took Ander's hand.

"Teagan, Captain Harris wanted me to tell you that he needs to see you," Elissa said.

"Thank you, I will head over there first thing in the morning," Teagan said.

"How is Alistair?" Elissa looked at Anders.

"He's had a rough day but he's doing better now."

"Would you like to see him?" Jessica asked.

"I don't…know if that's a good thing."

"He's asleep now Ellie," Anders said gently. "He's not going to wake up."

"It could help him," Teagan added.

Elissa willed her lip to stop quivering and nervously wrong her hands.

Anders why don't you take Elissa up there," Jessica said.

"Come on Ellie," Anders held out his hand and after a few minutes she took it and let him lead her out of the room.

…

Anders stopped by the door and looked at Elissa. He smiled when hearing Orana start to play the lute.

"Orana is playing the lute for him," Anders smiled.

"She plays beautifully," Elissa said. "Who is she?"

"She is Jessica's other servant," Anders explained as he opened the door.

….

Elissa let out a small gasp as walked towards Alistair's bedside. His reddish blonde hair was longer than she had imagined and it looked and it looked as if he had not shaved in weeks.

His breathing was raspy and he stirred as she approached him.

"I…failed you. Duncan. Forgive me."

Elissa stumbled back when hearing that and Anders steadied her.

"He says a lot of things like that Elle," Anders said. "Don't be scared."

Orana stopped playing the lute but Anders motioned for her to continue.

Elissa touched his hand as she valiantly lost the fight and started to cry softly.

"Alistair," She said as reached over and kissed his cheek. "Come back to me."

Anders's eyes widened in surprise as Alistair breathing grew calm.

"I'm sorry," Elissa cried as she hurried out of the room. Anders watched as she nearly crashed into Jessica.

"I'm sorry," Elissa said again.

"Its alright," Jessica said soothingly. "Let me take you to one of the spare rooms where you can calm yourself."

"Thank you."

Anders watched as Jessica put an arm around Elissa and take her to the room across from him.

A few minutes later Jessica came out then shut the door.

"Elissa said she'll be out in a few minutes."

"I love you." Anders put his arms around Jessica and kissed her. "Thank you for helping her."

"I just feel for her…for both of them," Jessica said. "Lets get back to Teagan."

Anders shut the door and went down the stairs with Jessica. His heart ached to see his best friend in such pain and he silently vowed to do everything in his power to reunite them.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Elissa went back to Alistair's room and slowly crept towards his bed.

Taking his hand, she kissed it and watched as he stirred.

"I forgave you a long time ago Alistair. Now you need to forgive yourself."

She reached down and caressed his face, blinking away the tears.

"I love you."

Turning, she left the room and headed back down the stairs.

…..

Jessica leaned against Anders as Teagan poured himself a drink.

"My heart just aches for them both," Jessica let out a sigh when feeling Anders arm around her.

"And this is only the first step for them," Teagan sat down.

"I'm sorry." Elissa said as she came in the room. "I knew it was going to be difficult. I just didn't figure how much."

"You look like you could use a drink," Anders said.

"What would you like?" Jessica got up.

"A brandy would be nice thank you," Elissa sat down.

"You don't have to apologize." Jessica handed her the drink. "I know this is _not_ easy for you."

"Alistair will recover from this Ellie," Anders said. "And once he sees you, he'll never want to let you go."

"Anders is right," Teagan agreed.

"I'm just relieved that he is safe and you two are caring for him." Elissa said after taking a sip.

"His addiction was in the early stages," Anders said. "The longer people use Olyrum the worse it is for them. It usually kills them or they end up going insane."

"Something happened at the Gallows today," Elissa set her goblet down. "I was attacked by a templar."  
>"Did you kill him?" Anders coughed. "What happened?"<p>

"I was at the leather smith arranging to get my other armor repaired. I ended up meeting Knight- Captain Cullen. He was at Ferelden's Circle and was imprisoned by Uldred."

"I thought he looked familiar," Anders said. "I think he arrived around the time of one of my last escapes."

"We were talking when this templar walked by with this mage and suddenly he just unsheathed his sword," Elissa said. "That poor female mage cowered back to me. She literally _crawled_ to me. Cullen tried to get him to stop but he lunged for me. I blocked the hit but he smited me to the ground. I was going to kill him but he dropped to the ground and went into convulsions before dying."

"Did he say anything?" Jessica refreshed her drink.

"He told the mage he was saving her life and told me Wardens consort with evil."

"Olyrum," Anders glared. "Its beginning to make sense."

"But the Chantry banned it," Teagan set his goblet down.

"I don't think the Chantry is aware what goes on with templars here," Jessica said.

"The mages I saw at the Gallows were _broken_," Elissa got up and paced around the room. "There is _no_ life to them. The Tranquil I saw wandering around appeared more alive. This mage Warden who escaped Kirkwall a few years ago warned me about how bad it was. I just didn't realize the extent of it."

"Believe me Ellie, being in Kirkwall has made me take back every horrible thing I said about the Circle in Ferelden," Anders poured himself a glass of water but set it down. "The mages here are treated like they are cursed."

"Cullen mentioned the Knight Commander would likely take time out of her schedule just to see me so we could discuss _why_ I did not annul the Circle."

"She wasn't present when this incident with the templar occurred?" Jessica asked.

"Cullen said she was out of the city inspecting outposts or something."

"We really need to get to the bottom of this Olyrum problem. Alistair and that templar you saw are likely _not_ the only ones afflicted by it," Jessica said. "Will you help us Elissa?"

"The Wardens are supposed to remain neutral but that's _never_ stopped me from doing what I think is right," Elissa smiled. "I wish I could help the mages that are suffering too."

"Yes, I would like to offer my assistance as well," Teagan offered. "I also have interest in helping the refugees here but that seneschal wouldn't even let me in to see the Viscount."

"Seneschal Bran is a pompous ass," Jessica spat. "I can get you in to see Viscount Dumar."

"Thank you," Teagan said gratefully.

"It will be like old times," Elissa said." "I am actually looking forward to helping you two."

"And to think I presumed you were the Warden Commander who made Anders give away Ser Pounce A-lot," Jessica smiled.

"No but I did manage to have words with the one who did."

"Those Wardens from Weisshaupt are not the most pleasant bunch," Anders said bitterly.

"No, they live like its still the first Blight," Elissa shook her head in disgust. "I've heard some rumors about dissention among the ranks though."

"So how is my brother?" Jessica asked.

"Teagan lets leave these two to talk," Anders suggested. "We can head to the dining room."

"Thank you," Jessica kissed Anders and poured another drink as he left the room with Teagan.

"I've been waiting for you to ask me about him," Elissa smiled.

"I didn't want you to think I was prying," Jessica said nervously. "When you mentioned Carver being the one who told you about Alistair, I couldn't believe it. He rarely wrote to our mother and since she…died I haven't heard from him."

"Anders told me about your mother," Elissa reached out and took Jessica's hand. "I'm sorry."

"Anders told me about your family. I'm sorry too. It must have been terrible leaving them like that."

"Its _never_ left me," Elissa briefly looked away. "That horrible night became woven into my being. They wanted me to live and the memories and the loves, its still with me and keeps me going."  
>"How is your brother?"<p>

"It was very difficult for him for awhile and there was a period where we didn't speak. He had to deal with his grief in his own way because it was different for him. My brother was wounded in the Wilds and basically lost in there for nearly a year. The Chasind cared for him until he was well enough to get out of there. It didn't take long for us to get close again. He's remarried to a wonderful woman and I have niece and a nephew."

"Anders mentioned you took him to spend the weekend in Highever once."

"I still remember that," Elissa smiled. "My grandfather supported more freedom for the mages and I wanted to show him some of his writing that survived the takeover of the castle and the rest of the time we drank, ate, and played cards."

"Anders mentioned the Cousland's were…mage friendly."

"My grandfather taught us mages were people who were blessed by the Maker with extraordinary abilities. There are times Fergus and I wondered if things would have been different had there been mages living in the castle the night Howe's men took over."

"I certainly wish there were _more_ people like you."

"Thank you," Elissa gave her a weary smile. "I can see by talking to you how your brother's anger affected his attitude about you."

"So how much does Carver hate me?" Jessica looked away.

"Hate was _never _mentioned in our conversations but the resentment was there and he didn't have the best attitude toward the Warden Mages in the beginning. And when I first met him, he wasn't too thrilled with me because I apparently reminded him of you. Speaking of which, where is your Mabari? I have one too."

"Sam is with our friend Aveline," Elissa explained. "She's Captain of the Guard and uses him for training."

"Its good that you find ways to give him exercise. This city does not seem…. very dog friendly. Rex is back at the ship but I'll probably take him out of the city in a couple of days."

"I'm sure that both of us having a war dog isn't the only thing that aggravated my brother," Jessica laughed.

"No," Elissa chuckled. "He told me my directness out on the field reminded him of you."

"I'm sorry about the bitterness he had. I'm sure he told you he did not become a Warden by choice and likely blames me for it."

"You _saved_ his life Jess," Elissa said gently. "Deep down he _knows _that. He's an excellent Warden and I can honestly see him becoming commander down the road. The ones with the most self doubt in the beginning tend to make the best commanders."

"You know from your own experience."

"Yes," Elissa admitted. "The Warden Commander of Ferelden _before_ me, the man who saved my life also had a great deal of self doubt in his early days. I just couldn't take the pressure of being Warden Commander and Arlessa of Amaranthine so I resigned."

"What do you do now?"

"The Wardens now have pretty much accepted that they can't regulate me into one role. I travel to the various compounds. I've been on some…missions. Sometimes I am a diplomat at which for the most part I am required to remain neutral. The rest of the time I've been in Ferelden."

"Anders mentioned you weren't one to follow the rules."

"No." Elissa laughed. "And there are many in the Order who resent me for it but my status gives them more clout than they had in the past so they put up with me."

"I'm not one for following the rules myself," Jessica smiled. "I guess I owe that trait to my father."

"I can see that. Just by the fact you and Anders are not at the Gallows tells me how you've used your talents and ingenuity well."

"Yes. But it also helps to have a circle of equally talented friends who also have their own…contacts."

"I look forward to meeting them."

"They will look forward to meeting you as well. Varric, our resident storyteller will really be excited to meet you."  
>"That's the dwarf I saw Anders with when you were taking Alistair back to the estate right?"<p>

"Yes. He's really been a great friend and his contacts will aid us in finding out where this Olyrum is coming from."

"Good to know," Elissa looked away.

"Elissa, I hate to ask this but is there anyway for you to find out whether my brother knows about what happened to our mother? Our uncle said he would send a message to the Wardens with the aid of his contacts but doubt has _always _lingered in my mind about that."

"Jess, I honestly don't know but I promise I _will find out_ for you," Elissa touched her shoulder.

"Thank you Elissa," Jessica let out a sigh. "Its been weighing on me for such a long time."

"I owe you so much for helping Alistair, it's the least I could do. And please call me Ellie. That's what my friends call me."

"Ellie it is then," Jessica smiled. "How about we head to the dining room for a bite? I'm sure they are waiting for us."

"I'd like that very much. The food on the ship leaves a lot to be desired. I've mostly been surviving on fruit and bread."

"Well how does Roast Chicken sound?"

"Sounds wonderful."

Jessica watched Elissa as she stood up. It seemed unreal that she was leading the Hero of Ferelden to the dining room. This woman was around her age, had saved the world but it was just like conversing with a regular person.

She did notice that Elissa exhibited the same weariness Anders had which was probably some residual trait for Wardens. Anders had told her about their shortened life span and it didn't matter to her. Her father had died when he was forty seven years old. That loss and fleeing Lothering taught her to embrace every moment like it was the last. It did haunt her that she sentenced Carver to that life. As with all of her failings, it would stay with her.

Jessica could honestly say that she liked her and wished she had found a friend like Elissa back in Lothering. And the few jealous thoughts she harbored before meeting her quickly disappeared when seeing the way she looked at Alistair. It was almost as if she could feel the love emanate from her. Seeing the pain and longing in Elissa's face made her want to help reunite them even more.

Anders and Teagan immediately stood up as they entered dining room.

"You have to excuse us," Teagan blushed. "We started without you."

"Teagan has a Warden's appetite," Anders joked.

"Actually, we have a lousy cook on the ship," Teagan sighed. "It's been a wonderful respite not being on board. We'll have stock up on fruit and other staples when we eventually depart."

"Lissa."

Jessica heard Elissa gasp and turned her head to see Alistair in the doorway. Wearing only his smalls, he braced himself against the doorway, staring at everyone in disbelief as a wide eyed Elissa covered her mouth in shock.

Alistair fell to his knees as Elissa rushed to him.

"Alistair," Elissa knelt down and took one of his hands as he looked at her with amazement. "I'm here."

"You…_can't_…be real!" Alistair reached out and touched her face before collapsing.

Anders and Jessica were already by Alistair's side as he started to shake uncontrollably.

"Alistair!" Elissa cried out as Teagan pulled her away.

"It's alright," Anders said. "Its part of his recovery. I just wasn't expecting him to get out of bed."

"But he's shaking the way that templar did!"

Anders put a hand on Alistair's forehead as his fingertips began to glow while Jessica guided a glowing white orb back and forth across his chest.

Alistair stopped shaking and his breathing had returned to normal.

"Strange," Anders remarked. "He should not have had the energy to get out of bed."

"Lets get him back upstairs," Jessica got up as Teagan helped Anders and Elissa carry Alistair.

"Mistress! What happened?" Orana exclaimed as she came out of the kitchen. "Alistair was asleep when I left his room."

"It's alright Orana," Jessica said reassuringly as she held the door open.

…

Jessica opened the door and was startled to find Sandal sitting on the chair by Alistair's bed.

"Sandal what are you doing in here?"

"Enchantment!" Sandal clapped his hands as Alistair was brought in.

"If only if it were that simple Sandal," Jessica took Sandal's hand and led him out of the room. "I'll take you Orana for a slice of pie."

A few minutes later Jessica returned and saw Elissa kneeling by Alistair's bed as Anders talked with Teagan.

"How is he?"

"Its odd," Anders scratched his head. "But its like most of his system has been purged of the Olyrum. I was expecting another three days at least."

"But that's a good thing right?" Elissa looked at him hopefully.

"It is but there is just _no_ way he could have had enough strength to get out of bed."

"Maybe he felt your presence Ellie," Jessica offered.

"I'm just glad he's alright," Elissa sighed.

"Alistair has _always_ been strong," Teagan said as he took Elissa's hand. "Let's go downstairs and let these two do what they have to do."

"We'll be down shortly," Jessica said.

As soon as Teagan and Elissa were down the stairs, Anders pulled Jessica back in Alistair's room.

"Did you feel it? The room felt…charged."

"It could have been left from when we were last in there," Jessica reasoned.

"Sandal was in here."

"Are you saying Sandal may have….done something?"

"Look how we found him in the Deep Roads Jess. Doesn't it seem strange that a man getting recovering from an Olyrum and drinking addiction suddenly has enough strength to make it downstairs?"

"Its like I said to Ellie, maybe he felt her presence," Jess put her arms around Anders. "It also could be that he recovers differently since he's a Warden."

"You could be right," Anders glanced at the sleeping Alistair.

"We should make sure he never gets out of bed like that again. He could hurt himself going down the stairs."

"I agree and the more clarity comes back to him, the more he will try to fight us."

"I really like Ellie. She's so nice. From looking at her, its just so difficult to believe all the things she's done."

"I know. I thought the same thing when she came upon me at the Vigil but then I saw her in action."

"Is she that strong?"

"I've seen her take on four darkspawn at once," Anders said. "But unlike other rogues she wields a sword and a dagger. She also has this uncanny way of getting out of situations. Ellie just has a good heart. She could have sent me back to the templars but saw things in me that I didn't see in myself."

"I'm just glad we're helping her and Alistair," Jessica said as she kissed Anders. "They deserve to be happy like we are."

"I agree," Anders said as he pulled her close. "Life is short. She and Alistair deserve to enjoy the years they have left…_together_."

"I'm going to head downstairs to the dining room."  
>"I'll be down shortly after I deal with Alistair," Anders brushed the hair out her face. "I'll probably walk her back to the ship later too. I need to talk to her some more."<p>

"I'll sit with Alistair for a bit then."  
>Anders gave her a kiss and watched her leave the room before making sure Alistair was restrained.<p>

"It was…. a dream wasn't it?"

Anders turned to see Alistair looking at him. His once gray complexion was now slightly pinkish in color.

"What did Sandal do to you?"

"Nothing. He kept… tapping… my face."

Anders watched Orana walking with Sandal down the hall before looking back at Alistair.

"Odd."

"She seemed… so real."

"Alistair where did you get the Olyrum?"

"Docks."

Anders watch Alistair closed his eyes and drift off.

"I guess that's a start," Anders sighed as he left the room.

…

"I like Jessica," Elissa broke the silence as they made walked to the docks. "She's a very gracious and easy to talk to. I wish I had a friend like her when I was growing up."

"I'm happy you like her," Anders smiled. "She likes you as well. Did you tell her about Carver?"

"I told her what I could and I promised her I would look into making sure her brother knows about their mother. She mentioned something about her uncle sending a message to the Wardens which left me a bit confused. He would not even know where to send a message unless he has contacts that know our drop here."

"I'm glad you're doing this for her. Its been wearing on her mind but what things are you not telling her about Carver?"

"Its nothing serious. He's fine physically but remember that broodmother I told you about? We saw it…giving birth and it wasn't eggs with those blasted children. It was live darkspawn," Elissa stopped and looked at Anders. "I've seen a lot of terrible things but that was by far one of the worst things I have ever witnessed and that was _not _even the end of it."

"What else did you see?" Anders's eyes glowed with concern.

"We witnessed two captured women in various stages of… transformation. Let's just say Carver really _grew up_ during that mission and if by chance he ever saw his sister again, he would _not_ be the same person she knew."

"Carver and I were _never_ friends but I feel for him. To see something like that when you're starting out as a Warden. I'm glad you didn't tell her."

"What I did tell Jess was the truth though. Carver is an excellent Warden."

"Alistair spoke to me before I came back downstairs Jess. He thinks you were a dream."

"I think that's for the best for now. I don't want to hamper his recovery. When he gets better he's going to be so mortified over his actions."

"He mumbled the word docks when I asked him about the Olyrum."

"You think there's a connection to what I witnessed at the Gallows?"

"There has to be Jess. The templars and chantry exist in their own world here and it would not surprise me that laws would be broken. You've seen how the mages are subjugated here. In all your travels have you ever seen mages treated this badly?"

"I've never seen mages so broken," Elissa admitted. "This place…something doesn't feel right."

"You don't know how much it means to me that you are willing to help us get to the bottom of this."

"I told Cullen that I am awaiting orders even though I've already done what I needed to do for the Wardens."

"I'm glad you said that because I'm afraid we might have to invoke your…name at one point."

"Of course," Elissa groaned. "The great Hero of Ferelden strikes again."

"It will be fun," Anders winked.

"As long as your main priority is caring for Alistair, I am game."

They slowed down as a group of Qunari walked passed them obviously heading back to the compound.

"Of course he will be," Anders promised. "I'm still shocked he had the strength to come down the stairs. I was actually thinking Sandal may have done something but I think his recovery will be quicker because he's a Warden."

"You're probably right."

"You should come by the Hanged Man tomorrow," Anders suggested. "If we're going to be investigating this, you're going to have to meet our friends."

"Did you tell them about me?" Elissa's eyes widened.

"Don't worry," Anders laughed. "They don't bite. Isabela might want to hump your leg though and Fenris will sneer at you. Varric and Aveline are your best bet if you want to have an intelligent conversation. And as for Merrill…I'll let Jess tell you about her."

"Sounds charming."

"They're not so bad," Anders laughed. "Well Fenris is but he has his moments where he does come in handy in a battle. I'll tell Jess to meet you at the docks tomorrow afternoon and I'll come by later."

"Why is it that I can never say no to you?"

"Because deep down you could never resist me," Anders teased.

"You know I am very proud of you Anders. I remember having to drag you out of that bed when we had to go out on the field. And then there was those two hour baths you took! Your devotion to the refugees and your dedication to the mages here is truly wonderful."

"Thank you," Anders said nervously. "And I'll have you know I still enjoy those baths."

"I'm sure you do," Elissa laughed. "I can walk the rest of the way now; you need to get back to the estate."

"Get some sleep," Anders kissed her on the forehead.

"I'll try," Elissa promised. "I'll come to the Hanged Man tomorrow."

Anders watched her for a few minutes before turning around.

Feeling Justice stirring inside him, he knew that he would eventually have to tell her and dreaded that look she would give him when hearing his revelation.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"So what is this big thing you have to tell us Hawke?" Varric said as he took a sip of ale as Isabela painted her nails.

"Well you know Anders is tending to Alistair at my place, right?" Jess wrung her hands nervously.

"Yes," Varric scoffed. "Your charity case."

"Should I start calling you Sister Hawke?" Isabela teased. "And Brother Anders?"

"Joke all you want," Jessica sighed. "Just get it out of your system before Elissa Cousland arrives."

"Wait," Varric set his mug down and looked at Jess. "You're not saying what I think you are saying? The Hero of Ferelden is _here_? In _Kirkwall_?"

"She doesn't like to be called that," Jess grabbed Isabela's bottle and stole a sip.

"You _met_ her?" Varric's eyes widened. "Does Blondie know she's here?"

"He met her first and she came to my place yesterday. She arrived on that big ship with Bann Teagan Guerrin of Rainesfere."

"She came on the Rowan?" Isabela licked her lips. "Is she as beautiful from what I heard?"

"Isabela! Jess raised a brow. "Please try _not _to embarrass me…too much… when you meet her. Elissa is very pretty but she's also very gracious and friendly. She's not like that Warden who took Carver away."

"You are no fun," Isabela pouted. "What is she doing here?"

"Isn't it obvious Rivaini? She's here to reunite with her lost love, that charming Warden that's been entertaining us the last three years."

"Alistair is also in the early stages of an olyrum addiction and Elissa witnessed a Templar die from those symptoms before she came to my estate."

"Speaking of Olyrum," Varric motioned for the waitress. "I talked to my Coterie contacts. They are not involved. It isn't even used as an aphrodisiac at the Blooming Rose. A couple of years ago, they used to sell it but then a lot of their members became addicted. A few customers killed some of their…workers at so it was immediately banned."

"Then the only possible explanation is that it's being produced for the templars by an outside source who sold it to Alistair," Jessica surmised.

"Why would the templars resort to this?" Varric scratched his head.

"They're doing this because they want to stockpile their lyrium supplies," Isabela chuckled. "So they violate the chantry's order and produce a lyrium substitute but somebody got greedy."

"And all we have to do is find that person who can lead us to where the stuff is being made," Varric said as he began polishing Bianca.

"And we get a female warden who is going to play with us," Isabela clapped her hands.

"There is just one thing you _cannot_ do when meeting her," Jessica warned. "Please do _not _mention Justice. Anders plans to tell her on his own. And please tell Fenris when he gets back from that mercenary job."

"Justice? I don't know what you are talking about my lady," Varric said as he continued to work on Bianca.

"Don't worry," Isabela laughed. "I won't say anything about Justice and I can handle Fenris."

"I don't think he will be a problem once he learns she killed those slavers we came across," Jessica said as she watched Varric rub the base of Bianca in a circular motion.

"She killed those slavers?" Isabela's eyes widened. "I think I like her already."

"I thought Wardens had to remain neutral," Varric put the cloth down and grabbed his mug.

"Elissa told me because of her status the Wardens basically leave her alone for the most part and she's currently not working on any official capacity for them. "

"Looks like I'm going to like her too," Varric laughed.

"She…met Carver. Its how she found out about Alistair," Jessica briefly looked away.

"How is your brother?" Varric asked gently.

"She says he's an excellent Warden," Jessica looked down at the floor and stomped on a spider that had scurried towards her.

"It's good to know he's doing well Hawke," Varric said as he exchanged glances with Isabela.

"I'd love to see what he looks like in his Warden armor," Isabela said before taking a gulp from the bottle. "So tell me. Did Anders sleep with Elissa?"

"Isabela!" Jessica glared.

"Come on Hawke," Isabela laughed. "You forget that I saw him at the Pearl before he had that voice in his head."

"If you must know, Anders told me he tried to but she declined his advances. They ended up being close friends though."

"Are you telling me that woman has not been with anyone since that drunk?" Isabela slammed the bottle down. "I get cranky if I go a week without sex."

"Isabela, there is _more_ to life than sex," Jessica said exasperatedly.

"Says the woman who was deflowered by Anders," Isabela retorted.

"Anders did not deflower me," Jessica started to raise her voice but calmed down. "You assume wrong that just because I lived the last ten years in Lothering that I was some delicate flower when I arrived in Kirkwall."

"Says the woman who had tumbles in the hayloft with inexperienced farm boys then," Isabela laughed.

"Hawke is right Rivaini there's more to life than a romp in the sack," Varric laughed. "Although that can be fun too."

"Says the dwarf who fondles a crossbow," Isabela scoffed.

"Isabela, whether you believe this or not but sometimes two people can love each other so much and share something so profound with one another that it goes beyond sex. And that's _all _I'm going to say on the subject. I also suggest you not make any remarks because Anders and I have the ability to make you _not miss_ sex," Jessica folded her arms.

"You were much more fun before you got together with Anders," Isabela grumbled. "I promise I'll _try_ to be good."

"What about Aveline?"

"Aveline won't say anything," Jessica laughed. "She's Captain of the Guard and would never dare to jeopardize her status by talking about something like that."

"That's true," Isabela agreed. "Miss Prim and Proper always goes by the book."

"Elissa will be here in a little while and Anders will be here later after he tends to Alistair," Jessica said as she stood up to pace around the room.

…..

Anders sat by Alistair's bed and watched as the man reluctantly finished his soup and then throw the bowl against the wall.

"I've finished my soup," Alistair folded his arms and leaned against the pillows. "Are you going to un paralyze my legs?"

"No," Anders picked up the bowl. "And you can't deplete my mana so I would suggest saving your energy."

"What will it take for you to let me go?" Alistair slammed an arm against the headboard. "Point me to the nearest Deeproads entrance so I can serve my penance for failing everyone that mattered to me."

"Alistair the only person you failed is yourself," Anders sat on the foot of his bed. "The Wardens don't even know about you and if they did, they wouldn't care. If they don't care about me they certainly don't care about you."

"I abandoned everyone at the end. I failed Elissa. I failed Duncan."

"Duncan is gone Alistair," Anders sighed. "You need to move forward and be the man he saw in you.

"I don't know how to be that person anymore," Alistair reached for the goblet of water but set it down.

"Yes you do," Anders insisted. "I saw that man the night of the storm when you helped those children. I finally witnessed the man Elissa described."

"Elissa is dead!" Alistair knocked the goblet down.

"She's _not_ dead!" Anders grabbed Alistair by the neck. "She survived Alistair."

"And how in the Maker's name do you know that?"

"Because I served in the Wardens with her after the Blight," Anders said as he picked up the goblet.

"Ellie is alive?"

Anders watched as the tears welled up in Alistair's eyes.

"Elissa became Warden Commander after the Blight. She conscripted me but we eventually became friends and I proudly served under her."

"What happened to Loghain?"

Anders was amazed by the venom in Alistair's voice. Elissa mentioned his hatred toward Loghain but never expected him to still have it after all this time.

"He's dead Alistair and _don't you dare_ say anything about him not deserving the glory or some other nonsense. You of all people know the Wardens do _not_ do this for glory."

"I knew I was wrong as soon as I left the Landsmeet," Alistair looked away. "It was too late… to go back. I was already exiled and on a ship waiting to depart. I can still hear her voice…pleading for me to not leave her."

Anders sighed as he looked at Alistair. Relief and regret emanated from him and it was obvious that he never stopped loving Elissa.

"Did she mention me?" Alistair looked up at Anders. "Did she tell you how I turned my back on our group and everything we had fought for?"

"Elissa said you disagreed with the choice she made and left."

"Oh come on," Alistair laughed. "You forget I traveled with her. I've seen her angry."

"Alistair," Anders folded his arms. "Elissa was so focused on the rebuilding the Wardens, ruling Amaranthine and dealing with the remnants of the Blight that she didn't mention you until a couple of months after she conscripted me."

"What are you talking about? Ruling Amaranthine? And as for these so called remnants of the Blight, I always assumed the darkspawn go back underground after the archdemon is slain."

"Oh that's right you don't know…you ran away," Anders laughed. "Queen Anora along granted the Amaranthine to the Wardens and Elissa's brother approved. It was assumed with Fergus being alive; Amaranthine would be absorbed into his teyrnir."

"Elissa's brother is alive?" Alistair gasped and struggled to sit up.

"He never made the battle at Ostagar," Anders explained. "His scouting group was attacked by darkspawn and his men were killed. He was severely wounded but some Chasind took him in."

"Ellie must have been overjoyed to be reunited with him."

"She was and they had a few months to mourn and rebuild Highever until she was made Commander of the Wardens and given the task to rebuild the order and rule the arling."

"But what was going on with the darkspawn?"

"I was just getting to that. The darkspawn did not retreat after the Blight. They fled Ferelden but there were still bands of them along the coast and close to Amaranthine and it was our job to get to the bottom of it."

"And what was going on?"

Anders shuddered at the memory as he got up from where he was sitting and started to pace around the room.

"There are darkspawn that have the ability… to communicate. And they had broken off into two warring factions. The ones who communicated controlled the ones who didn't."

"Talking darkspawn?"

"Yes Alistair and each side were ruled over by a monstrosity of epic proportions."

"Oh Maker," Alistair laid against the pillows. "Everything is alright now though?"

"Yes Alistair, its over with, Elissa made the decision to save Amaranthine but Vigil's Keep, where the Wardens were stationed was nearly destroyed."

"Is Ellie alright?" Alistair winced as he tried to sit up but laid back against the pillows.

"Elissa is fine. She left Amaranthine six months later and a Warden from Weisshaupt Fortress took command."

Alistair closed his eyes and remained silent for the longest time. It was obvious he was realizing how much of the last few years he had wasted.

"Elissa saved my life when she conscripted me," Anders continued. "She looked beyond the apostate that I was and saw things in me that I didn't see…until recently."

"And what exactly did she say about me?"

"Your abandonment hurt her deeply but Elissa forgave you because she knew you would _never _be able to forgive yourself."

Alistair sighed and covered his eyes with his arm.

"Please. Leave me alone."

Anders took one last look at Alistair before leaving the room and locking the door.

While he was glad to see Alistair was recovering, it was painful to see the man come to terms with his past. He barely covered some of the horrors Elissa experienced and to see the guilt on Alistair's face was too much for him.

Hopefully Jessica would be able to talk to him as well as get the name of the person who sold him the olyrum.

…..

"You know Elissa," Varric said as he poured her a drink that came from his private reserve. "The Merchant's Guild would drop on their knees if they knew you were here. When you made Bhelen king, you gave surfacers the legitimacy they didn't have before."

"Varric, the Dwarven nobility are so mired in tradition they fail to see that they are destroying themselves. Surfacers are slowly beginning to outnumber them and if they want to survive they need to completely destroy that wretched caste system."

"So what does dwarven ale taste like?" Jessica asked as she shuffled some cards.

"I wouldn't know," Elissa chuckled. "I couldn't get past the smell."

"I've heard it described as green piss," Varric chuckled. "Which makes me glad I was born a surfacer."

Elissa turned and looked at the woman getting a bottle at the bar and glanced back at Varric and Jessica.

"Does Isabela realize she's not wearing any pants?" Elissa took a sip of her drink.

Varric and Jessica looked at each other and laughed.

"She's looked this way since we've met her," Varric set his mug down.

"Even after all things I've experienced in my life, I don't think I have it in me to prance around like that. More power to her."

"That's because you still have your nobility in you sweet thing," Isabela laughed as she sat down. "And I must say I am impressed as well. I always assumed that Ferelden Battlemaidens were warriors."

"I always found that boring, so my father got some of the best retired rogues from to train me when I was growing up."

"That's a beautiful sword and dagger," Isabela said as she set her mug down.

"Thank you," Elissa smiled. "The sword is a replica of the Cousland family sword. My brother had it made for me. And the dagger once belonged to Duncan, the Warden Commander who saved my life."

"Well it will certainly nice…playing with a fellow rogue for a change," Isabela smiled. "And especially one that has the most extraordinary green eyes I have ever seen."

"Isabela," Jessica folded her arms and glared. "You _promised_ me."

"I'm sorry Hawke it's just like Varric's chest; I'm just drawn to certain things."

"It's alright," Elissa laughed. "Thank you Isabela. Green eyes are a Cousland family trait.

Jessica sighed and turned in time to see Anders enter the tavern.

"Anders," Jessica got up from her chair and threw her arms around him. "You're here."

"You know if you two want to have a quick tumble, my room is available," Isabela offered.

"I see Izzy is her typical charming self," Anders said as he kissed Jessica.

Anders looked at Elissa and saw her smiling at them.

"You two are just so….sweet," Elissa said before taking a sip of her drink. "How's Alistair?"

"He ate some soup," Anders sighed. "And then threw the empty bowl against the wall."

"Well that's definitely progress," Jessica laughed.

"I am so sorry about this," Elissa said apologetically. "He's always been stubborn."

"It's alright," Jessica patted her hand. "As long as he's getting better that's all that matters."

"Jess is right Ellie," Anders squeezed her hand. "I've talked to him a great deal and clarity is slowly returning to him. He's still very weak though but he's definitely on the road to recovery."

"That's good to know," Elissa looked at Anders. "But what do you mean about his clarity returning?"

"Rivaini lets leave these three to talk," Varric got up. "Let's go over the contacts we have not talked with yet up in my suite."

"Thank you Varric," Jessica watched as they got up from their chairs.

Anders glanced at Elissa who was looking at him anxiously, "He's reached the point where he wants to find the nearest Deep Roads entrance and just spend his remaining time killing darkspawn. You weren't exaggerating when you told me about the amount of self loathing he has."

"I suppose I shouldn't be surprised," Elissa sighed.

"Jess, I need you to go back…to talk to him," Anders looked at Jessica. "You are much better at reaching people than I am."

"Of course I'll talk with him," Jessica stood up. "I tried to last night but he shut me out."

"I think he will be more open to it now. We talked for a bit but he closed up again."

"I'll see what I can do," Jessica smiled.

"I know you can do it," Anders kissed her. "Look at all you've done for me."

"Thank you Jess," Elissa took her hand and squeezed it.

"I'm happy to be helping you Ellie," Jessica said. "You and Alistair deserve to be happy."

The minute she left the tavern Elissa looked back at Anders, "What else happened with Alistair?"

Anders took Elissa's hand and flashed back to a moment at the Keep years ago when he came upon her crying in the study.

"You were right Ellie. Alistair told me he regretted leaving the Landsmeet. He said you were right but it was too late for him to go back."

Anders watched as Elissa wiped her eyes and leaned against her.

"All that these years wasted," She sighed. "A part of me wants to scream at him."

"You should scream at him," Anders agreed. "But life is too short Elissa, especially for us."

"I know. Even if he doesn't want...to come back to Ferelden. I need to make sure he's alright."

Anders watched as Elissa got up and walked to the fireplace to warm himself.

….

Jessica found Alistair staring into space as she came in the room.

"Hello Alistair, I heard you ate some soup earlier so I thought you might like this," Jessica held out the plate of cheese to him.

"Orlesian Cheddar," Alistair said as he managed to pull himself up.

"Yes it is," Jessica laughed as she handed him a wedge. "You really know your cheese."

"Its one of the few things I haven't failed at," Alistair said between bites.

"We've all made mistakes Alistair. The best thing you can do is learn from them and move forward."

"Easy to say if your mistakes are not with you every second of the day."

"Alistair, _everything_ I have done is always with me. Remember when I told you my mother was murdered?"

"I do…. have a recollection of that."

"My mother's death is _always_ with me," Jessica set the plate down. "I made a promise to my father on his deathbed that I would look after the family. My sister was killed when we fled Lothering and my brother was forced to become a Grey Warden when he came down with the Blight sickness when we were at the Deeproads. I failed them _all_."

"How did your sister die?" Alistair reached for the goblet and took a sip.

"Bethany was trying to save our mother from an ogre and it killed her."

"She sounds like she was very brave."

"Bethany was a mage too but she viewed her gifts as a curse. There are times I wonder if she would still be alive had she embraced magic the way I did."

"How…did you avoid the templars?"

"My father taught us to hide our abilities."

"And your brother was a warrior?"

"My brother survived Ostagar," Jessica looked away. "He managed to get back to our farm and we fled within hours."

"We actually stopped by Lothering," Alistair closed his eyes and looked as if he was savoring the memory. "We did a few chantry board jobs; spoke to some people, got supplies and left. I always wished we could have done _more_ there."

"A great many people in Lothering were in denial about the Blight," Jessica sighed. "So don't blame yourself. We were a couple of miles out and my brother took out his spyglass and he was able to see the flames as it horde amassed into the village."

"You were lucky to get out when you did."

"We…had help but never mind that," Jessica shuddered slightly. As you can see, you are not the only who has failed."

"What in the name of the Maker were you doing in the Deep Roads?" Alistair folded his arms and looked at Jessica.

"You obviously didn't notice in your drunken stupor, but Fereldens were not exactly welcomed with open arms here. My brother and I had to work for a mercenary group that paid for our entry to the city the first year we were here. We were living a hovel. When I heard about a Deep Roads Expedition, I knew it would be a way out of Lowtown. The treasure we got paid for this estate."

"But it came at a price…your brother. You were lucky there were Wardens there."

"I know and from what I heard, he's an excellent Warden."

"You've heard?" Alistair asked. "Wardens usually cut ties with their families or has that changed?"

"I received a few letters from Carver," Jessica let out a nervous cough.

"Being a Warden isn't easy," Alistair sat against the pillows.

"I have a friend who had a husband that got the Blight sickness. I watched her…end her husband's suffering. I thank the Maker everyday that Wardens were there."

"You remind me of her," Alistair sighed.

"Is that a bad thing or good thing?"

"Both," Alistair admitted. "And seeing Bhodan and Sandal here brought everything back. You have a good heart…just as she did and you have her stubbornness. I also expect a Mabari to come bounding in here at any moment."

"I…actually have a Mabari," Jessica let out a nervous chuckle. "He's being borrowed by a friend at the moment."

"I knew it," Alistair shook his head.

"Sorry," Jessica laughed.

"So when are you going to let me go?" Alistair looked at her. "Look, I appreciate what you've done for me and I promise to stay sober. I just want to find the nearest Deep Roads entrance and do what I'm meant to do."

"You're still very weak from all that drinking and your dependence on olyrum," Jessica reached over and cast a glowing orb over his body. "You need rest and you need to put on a few pounds."

"I should have never taken that stuff," Alistair groaned. "That man at the docks selling it said it would help me get sober when I worked. It made me numb and gave me dreams at night."

"A templar nearly killed someone while under the influence of olyrum."

"What happened?" Alistair grimaced as he tried to move.

"The person is alright but the templar collapsed and died. Were you even aware that it was once used as a substitute before being banned?"

"I never heard of it until the man at the docks mentioned it to me."

"You were in the early stages of addiction Alistair," Jessica arranged his pillows. "It's known to kill people or render them insane once they reach the late stages."

"Since I don't enjoy puking my innards out, I promise I will never take it again," Alistair looked at her. "And that goes for drinking too."

"Alistair, do you remember who sold you the Olyrum?" Jessica said as she in the chair next to the bed. "We need to put this person out of business before he hurts more people."

"Maker's Breath! Do you think I can actually remember that?"

"You have to try. Anything you can recall would be a great help."

"I don't even think he said his name. He once gave me the job roster to sign one morning, the rest of the time my dealings with him were at night."

"Roster?" Jessica looked at Alistair. "I got you that job through Aden, the harbor master's assistant. I know he handles the work schedule as well as the hiring."

"That's the one who pulled me aside and said my work would improve if I took it."  
>"Thank you Alistair. You saved a great many lives now all we have to do is find out where he's getting it from."<p>

"I'm glad to have done something right for a change."

Jessica looked at Alistair. He was slowly becoming the man he used to be but the despair on his face showed he still had a long way to go.

"If you had the chance to see her again, what would you say?"

Alistair brushed the hair out his face and looked up at her, "I would tell Elissa that I was a fool for leaving her when I did and whether she wanted me back or not, she would always be the love of my life."

Sensing that Alistair needed time to himself, Jessica got up to find Bhodan so he could deliver a message.

…

Anders and Varric looked at each other and laughed at the sight of Isabela on the floor as Elissa stood over her.

"That was an excellent challenge," Elissa said as she helped Isabela up. "And it was a pleasure dueling with a woman for a change."

"Your welcome…I guess." Isabela huffed as she sat down.

"So tell me Ellie," Varric replenished Isabela's goblet and handed it to her. "Just how many female Wardens are there?"

"During all my travels, I've only met three," Elissa took a sip from goblet and set it down. "A mage and two warriors."

"Women tend to be…catty with one another," Isabela set her drink down and looked at Elissa. "Is it the same with Wardens?"

"Yes," Elissa laughed. "I got along wonderfully with the mage but let's just say the two warriors did not care for me but I think one of the reasons is that they forgot how to laugh after they became Wardens."

"Most of the ones I dealt with after you left Amaranthine seemed to lack of sense of humor," Anders remembered bitterly."

"There you are."

"Bhodan!" Elissa exclaimed.

"What is it Bhodan?" Anders stood up. "Is it Alistair?"

"Alistair is fine Master Anders," Bhodan panted as he handed a piece of folded parchment. "Mistress Hawke wanted me to give you this."

"Jess did it," Anders smiled as he read the note. "Alistair told her who sold him the olyrum."

"So who is the lucky bastard that Bianca will be meeting?" Varric got up from his chair.

"It was Aden," Anders handed the note to Varric who read it and gave it to Isabela.

"Liam's assistant at the docks," Isabela laughed. "I should have known."

"The last I heard he lives in a room in Liam's warehouse," Varric got out of his chair. "Let's pay him a visit."

"This will be fun," Isabela grinned as she followed Varric towards the entrance.

"Who is Aden and are we going to be meeting Bianca on the way?" Elissa asked as she walked with Anders."

"Aden is an arrogant blowhard," Anders explained. "And Bianca is Varric's crossbow."

"What?"

"I'll explain it on the way," Anders said hastily as they left the tavern.

...


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"The guard says he's at the Blooming Rose," Varric said as he stood by Anders, Isabela and Elissa. "He was happy to get those two sovereign."

"That's because Aden is likely paying him coppers," Isabela scoffed. "But Madame Lusine will charge us _more _just to get the information."

"Oh peachy," Elissa groaned. "I take it this is a brothel. The name sounds…_brothely_."

"Yes it is," Anders laughed. "They will see you are a Warden so you'll likely get the special discount they offer officials."

"If you weren't wearing your Warden gear, Madame Lusine would want to hire you," Isabela winked.

"It wouldn't be the first time," Elissa sighed. "I've been offered employment with the uniform too."

"Just tell Madame Lusine you are on Warden business and it has to do with Aden selling Olyrum," Varric suggested. "She'll be happy to help and will likely appreciate it if we get rid of him. The Coterie wants nothing to do with that stuff so we'll be doing them a favor."

"Let's get this over with," Anders groused. "The brothel is _not_ my kind of place.

"This from the man who wanted me to build a brothel on the old Turnoble Estate," Elissa laughed.

"I was… a different man then," Anders looked away.

"You know Ellie; I actually met Anders at the Pearl briefly. I actually didn't realize it until I got to know him," Isabella laughed.

"Really now?" Elissa laughed. "I presume you know about the electricity thing he does."

"He did it on you?" Isabela's eyes widened.

"No," Elissa laughed. "Back when I was Commander, my rules regarding fraternization were rather loose so I overhead a lot of Anders's guests."

"Ellie!" Anders groaned and shook his head. "Can we change the subject?"

"Alright," Elisa looked at Anders. "Would Jessica be upset if I told her that I once found Carver in a brothel, in bed with two….workers? I had to drag him out because I needed him."

"My sweet pup has finally gotten his fangs," Isabela said proudly.

"I never thought he had it in him," Varric laughed.

"She'll find that hilarious," Anders chuckled. "And its good he gets time away from the Wardens. He has enough broodiness as it is."

"And it's funny how you seem to have gotten a tad more broody since leaving the Wardens," Elissa folded her arms and winked.

"Kirkwall tends to make everyone moody Ellie," Varric glanced at Anders.

"We better get to the Blooming Rose if we're going to deal with Aden" Anders said hastily.

"You're right," Elissa agreed. "Let's get this done."

…

"It's an honor having you here Warden," Madame Lusine bowed. "What can I do for you?"

"Thank you," Elissa slipped a coin purse in Lusine's hand. "I'm sure you will find this amount _more_ than generous. We're looking for Aden. He's been dealing Olyrum."

"He's in the room to the right upstairs," Lusine counted out the sovereigns. "And thank you. You've given me enough to redecorate in case it gets messy for you."  
>"We'll try to not to get blood splattered on the walls," Elissa promised.<p>

"He has a friend with him," Lusine warned.

"That's alright," Isabela said as she followed Elissa upstairs. "The more the merrier."

"We'll be downstairs," Anders called out. "Try not to hurt them too much. I'm not planning on doing any healing tonight."

"We won't," Elissa laughed.

"This shouldn't take long," Anders looked at Varric.

…..

"Well look at what we have here," Aden grinned and set a bottle down as Isabela and Elissa entered the room. "We get to break in the new whores."

"You obviously don't remember me," Isabela laughed.

"Of course I remember you," Aden laughed. "You were with that bitch who wouldn't give me the finder's fee for the information on her crates. I didn't know you worked here."

Aden's friend got up from his chair and walked over to the table and grabbed the bottle.

"So who is your friend here?" Aden studied Elissa.

"This is the Hero of Ferelden," Isabela grinned.

"So she's dressed up as a Warden," Aden licked his lips. "I want to play the darkspawn that gets to taint her."

Aden suddenly found himself against the wall with a blade pressed against his groin.

"I bet you've _never_ seen a darkspawn," Elissa hissed.

"Feel his hands Ellie," Isabela said as she pointed her blade at the other man.

"What….what do you want?" Aden's voice shook and Elissa grabbed his hand.

"A few calluses but not much else," Elissa set his hand down.

"I was right," Isabela laughed. "I've never seen him at the Hanged Man."

The man Isabela was watching lunged for her when she briefly glanced away but her reflexes made her duck in time. In seconds he was on the floor and unconscious.

"You've been selling Olyrum," Elissa stuck the dagger against his leg. "The Chantry forbade production of it years ago. Even the Wardens don't sanction it unless the situation is dire. It can be as deadly as the Qunari made poison with prolonged use."

"I'm selling it for the Templars!" Aden declared. "One of them pulled me aside one night and asked me if I wanted to make some gold. I swear…it's the truth!"

"Who is your contact?" Elissa demanded.

"I don't know," Aden cried out. "They all wear those helmets and they have tranquil making the stuff at this abandoned entrance to the Deeproads."

"Which entrance? I saw no templars at the ones where I visited," Elissa glared.

"The map is on the table," Aden pointed.

Isabela grabbed the map off the table and looked at it before handing it to Elissa.

"And of course that's the entrance I haven't visited yet," Elissa sighed and looked at Aden. "I think it's safe to say we're done with you. I suggest you pack up what belongings you have and get out of Kirkwall."

Elissa and Isabela watched as Aden scurried out the room.

"Madame Lusine will have the bouncer take care of his friend," Isabela chuckled. "Let's go."

Anders and Varric looked up as Isabela and Elissa came down the stairs.

"The way Aden ran out of here, it's obvious you got the information you needed," Anders chuckled.

"Let's get out of here," Elissa said as she walked toward the door.

"Ellie, what is it you're not telling me?" Anders tried to hide his anxiety.

"I'll tell you outside," Elissa promised as she opened the door.

…..

"We're outside now," Anders said as he touched her arm.

"Aden verified he was hired by…templars," Elissa began. "He never saw their faces because of their helmets. They've been producing it with some tranquil."

"And just where are they producing it?" Anders folded his arms.

"We're right at the best part," Isabela remarked to Varric.

"I think I'm getting the idea Rivaini," Varric took two steps back then folded his arms.

"They've been producing it at one of the entrances to the Deep Roads, I haven't explored yet. We'll need to go there and deal with them."

"That's fine," Anders nodded. "When do we leave?

"I figure the day after tomorrow, I want to bring Fenris and we'll need another mage but I don't to leave Alistair left alone."

"We'll get Merrill," Anders said. "She was cast out by her clan and lives in the Alienage."

"And she's a mage?" Elissa asked.

"You could call it that," Anders shook his head. "She knows some primal spells and a few others that will help. She's also…. a blood mage."

"I don't think it will come to that," Elissa sighed and looked at Varric and Isabela. "We could use another rogue and to sweeten the deal, any treasure we find there is yours."

"Count me in sweet thing," Isabela grinned. "I love shiny things."

"Dammit Ellie," Varric groaned. "You had to make that offer."

"Come on Varric," Isabela said encouragingly. "I didn't go the last time, you can show me around."

"It's just piles of nug shit, darkspawn, giant spiders, and some occasional assorted chests Rivaini," Varric shrugged. "And deep mushrooms. Lots of mushrooms."

"You forgot Rock Wraiths. You know those things that were supposed to be Dwarven legends," Anders reminded him.

"Some of the other Wardens told me about them," Elissa said as she gazed upward at the moon. "I figure these templars are not venturing that far so we probably won't see any. My guess is they're likely set up fairly close to the entrance in case they have to make a quick escape."

"I'm holding you to that promise about those chests," Isabela grinned. "I'm heading back to the Hanged Man."

"I'm right behind you Rivaini," Varric turned and looked at Elissa. "I have some connections that will be able to provide us with some gear for camping. Is there anything else you'd like for our expedition?"

"Yes as a matter of fact, if you can possibly get your hands on some lyrium sand I'd appreciate it," Elissa smiled.

"I take it you're planning to blow something up?" Varric coughed.

"The plan is we deal with what we find over there and then I blow up the entrance," Elissa explained.

"And what about the templars we find?" Isabela folded her arms

"Ellie has dealt with templars before," Anders broke his silence.

"I was sworn to protect the land and that means occasionally taking extreme measures," Elissa looked at Isabela. "If those templars resist, it's not my problem.

"Well we'll see you in the morning, the day after tomorrow then," Isabela grinned. "I do hope we find something pretty down there."

"I'll be able to get that lyrium sand for you Ellie," Varric winked.

"Thanks Varric," Ellie smiled.

"Goodnight," Anders nodded. "Shall we head back to the estate?"

"Yes but walk slow," Elissa said. "I wish to talk some more."

"What's the matter?" Anders looked at Elissa. "Want to sit down over there?"

"I'm just thinking how I came here for Alistair as well as for unofficial Warden business and now I have stumbled on a possible criminal ring run by corrupt templars. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised."

"And I bet you didn't expect me," Anders smiled.

"No," Elissa chuckled. "But I'm glad you're here and I like Jessica as well as all of your friends."

"You haven't met all of them yet," Anders laughed.

"There's Merrill," Elissa remembered. "And Aveline. Is there anyone else?"

"Hopefully you won't have to meet Sebastian Vael," Anders groaned.

"I know that name," Elissa rubbed her brow. "The Vaels of Starkhaven!"

"He's actually the last of his line." Anders explained. "His parents and siblings were…murdered in a similar fashion as to what happened to your family."

"Maker," Elissa looked away. "How…how did he survive?"

"Seb is a chantry brother. He… heard about it and hired us to kill the mercenaries who slaughtered his family," Anders tried to mask the disdain in his voice. "We also dealt with the rival noble family who orchestrated the massacre."

"While I'm sorry for his loss, I'm getting the impression that you don't care for him."

"He's a pompous blowhard," Anders griped. "You'll see when if you meet him."

"I heard the Vaels were quite…religious," Elissa remarked.

"That's putting it mildly," Anders chuckled and looked at her. "But what else is bothering you? Is it Alistair?"

"I'm just tired Anders," Elissa sighed. "I'm tired of being the hero, I'm tired of being a Warden and I am especially tired of dealing with them. There is going to come a time when a bigger threat will overshadow what we have been sworn to protect and when that happens there will come a moment when we will have to decide whether to stay the course or to follow a new path."

"I agree," Anders looked away. "There neutrality stance is going to bite them in the ass."

"My brother built me a house deep in the Highever woods. It's close to a stream and it's very peaceful. It is about a six hour trek back to the castle but I don't mind."

"It sounds wonderful," Anders smiled. "It's where you want to be with Alistair isn't it?"

"I'm going to head back to the ship," Elissa got up. "And yes, I would like to share it with him."

"You know you're going to have to see him eventually Ellie," Anders looked at her.

"I know," Elissa sighed. "I'll see him _after_ we get back from our trip."

"I'm going to hold you to that," Anders pointed at her. "Jess and I will trap the both of you in a room if we have to."

"I have no doubt you two would do that," Elissa laughed. "Goodnight."

"Night," Anders watched as headed back to the docks before heading back to the estate.

…

Alistair looked up as Jessica entered the room and sat on the foot of the bed, holding a book.

"I think I'm a little too old for a bedtime story," Alistair scoffed.

"This is a book about Elissa and there's a section about you," Jessica opened the book.

"Oh this should be good," Alistair laughed.

"So you want me to read it?" Jessica asked.

"Go ahead. There is no use in delaying the inevitable," Alistair shook his head.

"Alright," Jessica chuckled as she began to read.

_My reasons for letting Loghain live were simple. There were only three of us in Ferelden and from a strategic standpoint; I felt it was necessary to increase the odds of our success. The man was pretty much broken and defeated by the Landsmeet and as much I wanted him dead, memories of kneeling in my father's blood still haunted me. I just could not do to the Queen what was done to me. So it was decided that Loghain become a Warden. Alistair was very much against my decision and walked out of the Landsmeet. Later on, he agreed to command a ground unit near the docks while the rest of us would deal with the archdemon. I later learned that area he was commanding was overrun. Darkspawn outnumbered the soldiers four to one there and Alistair's body was never recovered so he is presumed dead. Despite our difference at the end, I would have never made it without him. He will always be in my heart."_

"Oh come on," Alistair laughed.

"You think I'm lying?" Jessica shoved the book closer to his face. "Read it! _Now!_"

Alistair grimaced as he sat up in bed and read the paragraph Jessica pointed too.

Jessica watched as his eyes widened and he let out a small gasp.

"Maker," Alistair closed his eyes. "She… lied."

"Ellie did it because she loves you," Anders broke his silence and walked toward the bed. "She has _always_ loved you."

"Please…just go," Alistair turned away from them as he lay against the pillows.

Anders took Jessica's hand and led her out of the room

….

"How long were you standing there," Jessica wrapped her arms around Anders and let out a contented sigh as he pulled her close to him.

"I was there long enough to see you get angry at him," Anders chuckled softly and brushed the hair out of her face.

"I was more annoyed than angry," Jessica laughed softly. "Did you and Elissa get the information you needed?"

"Yes," Anders sighed as they headed to the bathing room. "I see you have a bath waiting for us."

"Yes, I figured we could have some quiet time," Jessica began to unbutton Anders's robe. "So what did Aden say?"

"The templars have been producing it," Anders removed Jessica's robe. "And what's even worse is they're producing it at one of the Deep Roads entrances we didn't use."

"When do we leave?" Elissa stepped in the tub as Anders undid his boots.

"I'm sorry love but we need you to stay with Alistair," Anders got in the tub and Jessica scooted closer to him. "I had a thought about leaving Merrill with him but he'd be able to con her into letting him go. We're bringing her along with Fenris. Isabela and Varric are tagging along too."

"But what happens if you lose…control?"

"If something happens…I'll just have to tell her and hope she understands," Anders sighed. "This entrance is a two day trek and I'm sort of hoping their luck ran out but they may have tranquil with them and it kills me at how they will be victims no matter the outcome."

"You think Meredith is behind this don't you?"

"I think she probably angered the Dwarven Merchant guild and created a shortage. Olyrum is a good lyrium substitute until it makes you crazy."

"So do you think Elissa will be ready to finally see Alistair when you get back?"

"She made a promise to me that she would see him once we get back," Anders kissed Jessica's cheek. "I told her if we she didn't keep it, we'd lock her in a room with him."

"I think the moment they look at each other will mark a new beginning for them," Jessica smiled.

"I hope so love," Anders sighed. "She deserves it. They both do ."

Putting his arms around Jessica, Anders closed his eyes and let the peace envelope him.

….

"You know Ellie, I met a Warden once. He came through our camp a little while after we lost Tamlen in some ruins. His name was Duncan."

Anders watched as Elissa stopped and turned around. Her eyes conveyed a sad wistfulness for he knew one of her greatest regrets was never thanking Duncan for all that he did for her.

"You met Duncan?" Elissa looked Merrill. "He had a beard and always had his hair tied back."

"He was the first bearded human I had ever seen," Merrill marveled. "He was very nice to all of us…but he seemed very stoic and determined to deal with those ruins. How did you meet him?"

"Duncan came to Castle Highever looking for a new recruit and he saved my life when my family was betrayed and murdered by Rendon Howe.

"I'm sorry," Merrill looked at her sadly. "Many clans have said they loved the Highever Woodlands because if it was one of the few places where they were not harassed by humans."

"My family and the people of Highever never had any problems with the Dalish," Elissa pointed to her bow. "And this ironbark bow was given to me by some scouts after I retrieved some relics for them. I'm glad you met Duncan. He took care of me after we escaped Highever and saw things in me that I've only now begun to see."

"I'm curious Elissa," Fenris took a sip from his flask. "Was Anders a good Warden?"

"You don't have to answer that Ellie," Anders glared at Fenris.

"He was an _excellent_ Warden," Elissa looked at Fenris. "Oh sure he whined about the Deeproads, but when I needed him he was _always_ there for me."

"I just _never_ understood why he left," Fenris glanced at Anders.

"How did you survive Ostagar?" Isabela asked as she slipped a canteen back from her pack.

"Flemeth saved her life and Alistair's life she saved Jessica, Carver and everyone else when they fled Lothering," Anders shook his head. "And Ellie, I have to say your description didn't do her justice."

"You…met _Asha__'__bellanar__?" Merrill exclaimed. _

Anders turned to Elissa, and saw her standing still and the color draining from her face.

"When I met Carver, he never told me how he was rescued," Elissa said as she tried to process what she heard. "He told me I'd never believe it which I thought was funny considering everything that I have seen."

"We're getting close to the entrance," Anders turned back to look at the group. "Ellie and I will scout ahead."

"We'll call if we need you," Elissa said as she followed Anders down

a rocky side path.

…

"Ok they can't hear us," Anders stopped and looked at Elissa. "The minute I mentioned Flemeth you suddenly changed. What is the matter?"

"It's not a coincidence that Flemeth rescued Jessica," Elissa paced around Anders. "Finding you here, Jessica and Carver being from Lothering, Flemeth rescuing Alistair and me, and let's not forget Bhodan and Sandal living at the estate. Something has been set in motion."

"What do you mean?"

"I _saw_ Morrigan again Anders," Elissa leaned against a tree. "I received reports that she was back in the Wilds and I tracked her all the way to the Dragonbone Wastes…where we killed the architect and that broodmother."

"But I thought the Wardens were going to guard that place," Anders shook his head.

"The Wardens got what they wanted," Elissa said after taking a sip from her canteen. "They have the bodies back in Weisshaupt. There was no more Darkspawn so it means nothing to them."

"What was Morrigan doing there?"

"Morrigan was standing in from of this mirror. And this was no ordinary mirror Anders. There was this glowing mist swirling around it."

"Would this be…. an Eluvian mirror?" Anders looked at Elissa.

"How did you know that?" Elissa's eyes widened.

"Your Duncan apparently broke the mirror in some old ruins where Merrill's clan was staying at the time. She was cast out of her clan because of her desire of wanting to repair it. The keeper of the clan gave us this tool to help her after we killed a Varterral but begged us not to give it to Merrill. Jessica refused to give it to her and later returned it Keeper Marethari. Merrill has not given up on her goal though."

"Anders I saw Morrigan step in a mirror and _disappear_," Elissa said in a tone that scared him.

"Did she say anything?"

"Morrigan rambled on about her mother being something more than an abomination. She told me not to fear the change that was coming and before disappearing….pointed to a book on the ground and said it was a gift."

"What was in the book?"

"The book was old but it…described a possible cure from the taint."

"Did you by chance bring this book?"

"It's back in my quarters on the ship. I promise I'll show it to you when we get back."

"Good because I want to see it. What happen to the mirror?"

"It's locked up in a vault at Warden's Keep and if I ever get back there it's going to get shattered."

"Good," Anders sighed. "I will tell Jessica what you told me and hopefully we can convince Merrill to _give up_ this quest of hers."

"Did you see Flemeth too Anders?" Elissa folded her arms.

"Yes," Anders looked away. "Jessica, her mother, Aveline, and Carver were saved by Flemeth on the condition they take this amulet to a Dalish keeper named Marethari. It's how we met Merrill."

"And what happened? Did she fly down from sky?"

"Merrill did this ritual on the amulet and she appeared on this stone altar that was on top of the mountain. Flemeth said it was a _piece of her_ that was in amulet and that it was just a precaution in case Morrigan did anything.

"Maker," Elissa sat down on the ground and stared straight ahead. "Flemeth _knew_ what Morrigan was planning."

"She is very powerful Ellie. Her magic is unlike anything I have ever seen."

"Did she say anything?"

Anders looked away and closed his eyes. The memories of that time

on the mountain came back to him. He remembered Flemeth speaking as her yellow eyes piercing through him. While denying it back then, it was obvious she knew what he had become.

_ "We stand upon the precipice of change. The world fears the inevitable plummet into the abyss. Watch for that moment...and when it comes, do not hesitate to leap. It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly."_

"She mentioned something about the world… about to change," He admitted.

"So even if I had killed Flemeth she wouldn't have been dead," Elissa shook her head and laughed. "I guess I should not be surprised. And did you know that the Couslands are part of her legend? Sarim Cousland was the captain of Conobar's Guard. It is said that Bann Conobar Elstan has a connection to the Howe family as well."

"Elissa if that's true then it's just a coincidence," Anders chuckled nervously.

"I'm also beginning to believe that my brother was deliberately trapped in the Wilds. Awhile back Fergus confessed that he knew what happened. He saw our family in a dream and ever so often when he tried to regain consciousness he'd hear voices. I think Flemeth put him under some spell, had the Chasind care for him and when it was time for him to come back, they set him free."

"So you've come to believe every action has a reason," Anders looked at Elissa. "Do you believe that for Justice as well?"

"I believe Justice becoming trapped in our world was an accident but I will _never_ regret getting to know him and I count him as one of the best friends I will ever have."

"I'm glad you said that because there is something I need to tell you," Anders sighed and looked away.

"You know you can tell me _anything_ Anders," Elissa smiled.

As Anders turned back face her, the whispering in his mind started which was the followed by a shriek. He watched as Elissa rubbed her head and stood up.

"Did you feel that?" Elissa unsheathed her sword and dagger just as a Genlock Alpha barreling down the path.

...

**To Be Continued**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Elissa and Anders looked down at the corpse of the genlock as they cleaned themselves off.

"So tell me Ellie, in your travels have all the darkspawn appeared different than what they look like in Ferelden?"

"There have been some variances," Elissa wiped her blades. "But they certainly didn't look like what they are here. The Wardens in Ansburg say something has _corrupted_ them."

"Corrupted darkspawn!" Anders shook his head. "Now I've heard it all."

"I know," Elissa laughed wearily. "Come on. We're close to the entrance."

Making their way through the brush, they found the entrance along with the bodies of the Templers scattered around it.

"Get their signet rings," Elissa said as she bent down to examine one of the corpses. "I will bring these back to Cullen and maybe this will get me a meeting with this Meredith."

Anders knelt by one of the bodies and was startled to see the mutilated man stir.

"Please…kill me," the man begged.

"Who was in charge of this operation?" Anders eyes began to glow.

"It was….Meredith. She's been… rationing… the… lyrium and wanted a substitute for the ones who have not… been knighted yet."

"Why is she rationing lyrium?"

"She…is stockpiling…it."

Anders looked away and took a deep breath. He could feel Justice surging upward and fought desperately to remain in control.

"Please…kill me."

The Justice part of him wanted to keep the templar alive. He wanted that man to feel the full effects of the corruption but he gave the man mercy.

Anders handed her the rings he acquired. "He said it was Knight Commander Meredith who orchestrated this."

"What is she like?"

"Jessica and I have never met her but we know of her deeds. Remember Rylock? Meredith makes her appear tame. The Circle here is not like how it is Ferelden. It's a prison and she has given her Templars open reign to do what they wish."

"Cullen doesn't seem like the type that would let mages be abused."

"Perhaps not, but he could be the type that _looks_ away," Anders leaned against the rock. "You told me about him when you saved the Circle. He could be harboring repressed anger over his experience when Uldred took over."

"You could be right," Elissa sighed.

Just then, they both stumbled back after hearing a scream and Elissa touched her forehead.

"Do you feel that?"

"Yes," Anders grabbed Elissa's arm and braced himself. "There's a broodmother in there and I am relieved Jess is not here.

"We need to go in and deal with it. Varric and Fenris can come with us. Isabela and Merrill can trail behind and provide backup if needed. I don't want them hurt."

"What's this about backup?"

Elissa turned to Isabela and the others coming towards them.

"There's a broodmother somewhere in there," Elissa pointed to the entrance. "It's not safe for the two of you."

"What's a broodmother?" Merrill asked.

"I believe that's where darkspawn babies come from Daisy," Varric let out an anxious chuckle.

"Will the broodfather be here too?" Merrill's eyes widened.

Elissa and Anders looked at each other as Varric shook his head.

"Kitten I don't think darkspawn are conceived in the same fun way," Isabela sheathed her dagger.

"There is no time to explain," Elissa took a sip from her canteen and slipped it back in her pack. "Broodmother's make Darkspawn but they are also…created."

"For the love of the Maker just tell them Ellie!" Anders snapped. "Broodmothers are created from human, elven, dwarven, and Qunari women captured by darkspawn and…. changed. They will sense the both of you immediately which is why the two of you have to trail behind us."

"Are you alright Anders?" Elissa gave him that annoyed looked he remembered too well."

"I'm sorry. I just want to get this over with," Anders looked away.

"I didn't trek all the way here just to get told to stay at the back in the line. I can handle myself and so can kitten," Isabela insisted.

"Alright," Elissa relented. "But when I say run, you better run!"

"We will," Merrill promised.

"Merrill knows a lot of primal magic which will come in handy," Anders said as he made sure the lyrium vials were within reach in his pack. "Isabela is quick on her feet and adept using poisons. Varric has…Bianca. I've seen her in action and Fenris is well…"

"And what am I _Mage_?" Fenris folded his arms and glared at him.

"Broody has some of his own…unique talents," Varric stepped between them. "Bianca is equipped and ready. Do you have any idea what type of broodmother we'll be facing?"

"An ear piercing scream roared out of the cave causing the group to wince and block their ears.

"That sounds like a shriek broodmother which means it won't be as big since they don't give birth to as many as Hurlock and Genlock broodmothers," Elissa tightened up

"What is a shriek derived from?" Merrill asked.

"Where do you think they come from? Fenris turned to her. "They're us."

"Then I _need_ to see it," Merrill declared.

After lighting two torches, they ventured inside the entrance, stepping over the bodies of two more Templars and several tranquil. Elissa took their signet rings and placed them in the pack with the others before continuing.

They stepped through the rubble of the side passage finding a broken a table and shattered apothecary tools strewn about.

"This was where they made the olyrum," Anders kicked the pail of lyrium over as Elissa examine the kettle.

"Look," Isabela ran over to the battered chest that was sitting by some crates. "Varric can you do this? My hands are shaking."

"They must have been planning to take it back to the Chantry," Anders remarked as he watched Varric pick the lock.

"And they would have sold the relics and pocketed the coin," Fenris broke his silence. "I used to overhear conversations with my Master. That is what the Imperial Chantry would do. I suspect it's no different here."

"Rivaini would you stop trying to lift the chest," Varric griped as he fumbled with the lock.

"Here," Fenris stepped in front of the chest as Varric and Isabela hurriedly stepped aside. Elissa let out a gasp when she saw his markings begin to glow and with one hit from his sword, the chest was open revealing a huge stash of gems and other trinkets."

"By the Creators!" Merrill exclaimed.

"Isn't it beautiful Kitten," Isabela knelt down. "I mean just look at it all! I wonder why the Templars didn't immediately bring this back to the Chantry."

"Because they are arrogant fools," Anders scoffed. "They assumed they would be safe and would be able to handle anything that comes their way."

"Anders can you do that light as a feather spell?" Elissa looked. "Let's take this outside and hide it in the bushes until we're finished."

"Aren't there special Warden Rules about this?" Varric chuckled.

"I've _never _been a by the book Warden Varric," Elissa bent down and picked up a runestone that was on top of the pile. "I'll probably take a few of those jewels when we're done with this. Fergus and Teagan can have some jewelry made out of them for their wives."

"Don't you get paid?" Isabela looked at Elissa. "I mean you can't be doing this for free."

"We get a stipend but my brother always makes sure I have extra coin," Elissa slipped the runestone in her pocket. "The First Warden also lets the expeditions keep half of the salvage now to pay for the Keep's maintenance and such. And I tend to pocket things that catch my eye."

"Good," Isabela grinned. "It's nice to know Wardens enjoy the occasional shiny."

"I bet I know _who_ is going to get that runestone," Anders whispered in Elissa's ear remembering all the times he watched her put similar things in her pack when they were in the Deep Roads.

"Look at this heart shaped ruby," Elissa picked up the gem. "I think you should take this Anders and have something made for Jessica. And I expect you take some to sell for your clinic."

"You don't have to worry about that Ellie," Varric grinned. "I'll be handling it.

"Jess really doesn't wear that much jewelry but that would be perfect for her," Anders admitted.

"I know someone who can get that set into a pendant for you Blondie," Varric closed the chest. "Now let's get this outside."

"You won't be able to lift it until I do this," Anders shook his head as he placed a spell on the chest. "You have two minutes before it wears off."

"I'll do it," Fenris lifted the chest and walked toward the entrance. "I'll place it in those bushes."

The sound of a scream made them draw their weapons and a band of darkspawn descended upon them just as Fenris returned.

"They know what we're after!" Elissa yelled as they fought their way through the darkspawn down a rubble-filled corridor.

…..

"How is he?" Jessica looked up at Teagan as he came into the sitting room.

"Quiet," Teagan sighed as he sat down. "He did ask for one thing though…a haircut."

"The fact that he wants to clean himself up is a good thing," Jessica smiled. "I used to cut my brother's hair so I can do it whenever he wants."

"When I came in the room he was holding that book you gave him and staring into the fire. That book and your words obviously made an impact on him."

"He was quite shocked that Elissa lied about what happened."

"And he'll be equally surprised to learn he won't be arrested by Anora upon his return to Ferelden."

"He did call himself a traitor the first time I encountered him."

"Elissa made sure that would be rectified before we left," Teagan chuckled. "Anora will leave him alone."

"The queen sounds like she's difficult to deal with."

"With my brother being chancellor, it keeps her at bay," Teagan took a sip from the goblet Elissa handed him. "Don't get me wrong, Anora is a fair ruler and is loved by most of the people but tends to think she doesn't need help."

"I can say something else about her but I won't."

"Alistair!"

They turned to see him hugging the doorway and immediately rushed over to him.

"The spell must have worn off;" Jessica put an arm around him and helped Teagan get him in a chair."

"I want to go back to Ferelden," Alistair looked at Teagan. "When are we leaving?"

Teagan glanced at Jessica then looked back at Alistair, "The ship is still getting repairs because of the storm and I have some business to attend to."

"And you are not fully well yet," Jessica added.

"I need to see Ellie," Alistair sighed. "Do you know where she is?"

"Well…the Wardens now control Amaranthine and reside in Vigils Keep."

"Isn't that Rendon Howe's old place?" Alistair took a sip of the tea Jessica handed to him and set the cup down.

"It was given to the Wardens after the Blight," Teagan explained. "Elissa ending up conscripting his oldest son as well."

"I bet he loved that," Alistair snorted.

"Actually Nathaniel and Elissa made peace with each other after he discovered some more disturbing revelations about his father," Teagan explained. "I met him a couple of times. He was very cordial and seems determined to redeem the Howe name."

"What do you plan to do when you return to Ferelden?" Jessica asked.

"I honestly don't know," Alistair looked away. "I'm still working it out in my mind."

"When the time comes just speak with your heart Alistair," Jessica said softly.

"Easier said than done," Alistair laughed wearily. "One part of me is terrified, another part wants to beg forgiveness, and another part wants to yell at Ellie for lying about me."

"Why don't we help you back upstairs," Jessica watched Alistair sink back to his chair. "I can have some soup brought up if you're hungry."

"I think that would be good," Alistair sighed. "I feel like I climbed down a mountain."

"You haven't regained your strength yet," Teagan got out of his chair and helped Alistair up and Jessica took his other arm.

"I'll have Bhodan bring you a tray when he gets back," Jessica said as they helped Alistair out of the room.

…

"No!" Merrill cried as Isabela cleaned her up after she vomited from seeing the broodmother. "That…monster could _not_ have been an elf."

"Merrill," Elissa said gently. "I felt the same way when I saw my first broodmother. I am sorry you are seeing this but you have to know that thing in there is no longer an elf. Her memories and identity were destroyed when she…changed. Her spirit is gone."

"Ellie is right Daisy," Varric said gently.

"We should get on with this," Fenris folded his arms. "They could be amassing in one of the corridors."

"We would have felt them by now," Anders looked around. "We got most of them."

"There are a few behind her," Elissa slipped the spyglass in her pack. "Do you have the lyrium sand Varric?"

"I was able to get two vials," Varric said as he handed them to her.

"See that old cart across from her?" Elissa pointed. "Anders…can you…"

Before Elissa could finish Anders had set the cart on fire and crouched behind the wall while the broodmother thrashed around.

"You haven't lost your touch I see," She grinned while fastening a vial to an arrow.

"Ellie you're not going to do what I think you are going to do?" Merrill's eyes widened.

"She is," Anders rubbed his head. "And you better hurry because I'm feeling them again.

"Get ready to fight," Elissa brushed past them and down the bridge cutting down several darkspawn. As Isabela and Fenris plowed through them, He rained down electricity, Merrill unleashed a firestorm and Varric let out a hail or arrows. Looking back, he watched Elissa launched one the arrows with Lyrium sand toward the fire and the explosion knocked her back as the ground started to shake.

"Run," Anders yelled as he followed the others toward the entrance looking back to see Elissa slowly making her way towards them. She stopped and aimed her bow and fired the other arrow with the vial. Engulfed in flames the broodmother was still shrieking and flailing its tentacles but the impact of the arrow swallowed it in a massive explosion.

Anders cast a haste spell on Elissa as the caves ceiling starting falling. They made it outside only to be standing before half a dozen templars.

"Stand down," A woman in her forties stepped towards her and Anders recognized her from the time at Sundermount when she was trying to take Fenyriel.

"I am on Warden Business," Elissa glared back. "We just destroyed a broodmother and several dozen darkspawn.

"This is the Hero of Ferelden," Varric chimed in.

"Is it true you had had a heathen ox man in your group as well as an apostate?" The woman folded her arms."

"Wardens accept help from _anybody_," Elissa put a hand on each hip.

"And your Order recruits the dregs of society," the female templar retorted. "And look what you have for your help now. A pirate whore, a dwarven thug, a surly elf a Dalish refugee and a freak with feather pauldrons."

"That's broody elf," Fenris broke his silence.

"You think you wounded me by calling me a whore?" Isabela laughed.

"Where the templars who were stationed here?" One of the male templars spoke out.

"They were killed by darkspawn," Merrill pointed to the dead genlock on the ground.

His heart beating rapidly, Anders squeezed his hands and looked away.

_"She can't know this way,"_ he silently pleaded.

"I presume the templars were looking for apostates," Elissa said. "I am here on behalf of the Wardens. And these people are assisting me."

"Shouldn't there be more Wardens with you?" Another templar laughed. "And isn't the Blight is over with. Why are darkspawn still about?"

"You obviously don't know much about the Wardens do you?" Varric chuckled.

"I am sorry I didn't arrive sooner. Your…brothers were over taken." Elissa said diplomatically. "You should take comfort in knowing they fought valiantly and as for the darkspawn…there will always be stragglers."

"What is with your friend's tattoos?" The female templar looked at Fenris. "It looked like they…almost glowed for a minute."

"What sort of trickery is this?" One of the male Templars started to draw his weapon as they slowly backed away.

Fenris looked over at Anders, "I hate to admit this but I see now why they can be irritating to you.'

"The markings are lyrium," He glared back at the Templars. I was a slave in Tevinter and my old master had lyrium seared into my skin."

"You want to see what he can do with those markings," Isabela goaded.

"Shut up Rivaini," Varric said as he grinned nervously.

"Look as I said, we arrived too late to save your brothers…group…Order whatever you call yourselves when you are in a group," Elissa sighed. "I was intending to go to the Gallows to speak with Knight Commander about this unfortunate event."

"I remember _you_," The female Templar stepped towards Anders. "You were with Hawke defending those Knife Ears at Sundermount"

Remaining silent Anders stared back at the women and nodded.

"What is that on your back?" A Male Templar asked Merrill.

"By the Maker…you are both apostates. The rumors about Hawke consorting with mages is true. Drop your weapons _now_," The woman commanded.

"We are _not _going anywhere with you." Justice roared.

"Knew this was going to happen," Varric shook his head as Elissa turned to Anders seeing his eyes glowing blue for the first time.

"Jus…tice?" Elissa's mouth dropped.

"He's an abomination!" The woman withdrew her sword. "Kill him. Kill them all."

They were fighting within seconds and it was over as quickly as it started.

"They will die!" Anders roared. "They will all die."

Covered in blood and dirt; a stunned Elissa slowly walked toward him

and put her hand on his shoulder, "Anders?"

The sound of her voice appeared to have gotten to him as the glow in eyes faded away and he dropped to his knees.

Regaining control again, Anders looked around and saw the bodies of the Templars and his friends watching him with concern. Varric motioned for him to look behind him and he was greeted with Elissa's stunned expression.

"Anders…_What did you do!?"_ She cried out.

"Maker…I didn't want you to find out thiis…"

Before he could finish, Elissa crumbled to the ground apparently fainting from the shock of seeing Justice.

**To Be Continued**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**_(A/N: Warning -Chapter is long)_**

"Well I certainly wasn't expecting the Hero of Ferelden to faint," Varric chuckled.

"It's not every day you find out one of your friends is an abomination," Fenris said plainly as he wiped the blood off his sword.

"Not another word!" Anders picked up Elissa. "I'm going to take her to that brook that we passed not far from here."

"You go ahead Blondie," Varric nodded. "We'll clean up here."

"Be sure to get Elissa's weapons Varric," Anders said as he walked away.

Casting haste, he practically glided down the path and carefully set her down on a patch of grass.

"Ellie I _swear_ I was going to tell you before you left," Anders splashed some water on her face and she immediately opened her eyes.

"For the love of the Maker…I was already awake when you were setting me down."

"Are you alright?"

"Alright? Oh, I am just _fine_! I've always wanted to have another friend that has a spirit inhabiting inside of them!" Elissa stood and brushed herself off. "And just when were you planning to tell me? The day I leave from this cesspool of a city?"

"I was just looking for the right moment." Anders shrugged and looked away."

"Right moment?" Elissa yelled. "There is _no _right moment for something like this. Just what in the Maker's name were you thinking? Did you do this right after I left?"

"If you lower your voice I'll tell you everything," Anders sat down on the grass and motioned for her to sit.

Anders could see the concern in her eyes as she sat down. And after a few minutes, he could see the guilt as well.

"Well I'm certainly glad you're not scared of me," Anders said quietly.

"Why should I be scared? I know you would _never_ hurt me and I know Justice wouldn't hurt me."

"No. We wouldn't." Anders agreed. "Justice cares for you."

"Wynne and I talked about this…he's a part of you now," Elissa studied his face.

"Yes," Anders nodded. "Justice and I are one."

"I should have realized it sooner," Elissa shook her head. "I thought it was Jess that brought about these changes in you. I should have _known_."

"Jessica's faith and love sustains me," Anders said quietly. "There are times I don't think I would still be alive now if I hadn't met her."

"When did you do this?"  
>"It was about two months after you left," Anders stood up. "Ellie you <em>knew <em>time was running out for Justice. Kristoff's body was decaying despite everything we did and the new Warden Commander was very weary of him. While heading to patrol Knotwood Hills we witnessed some Templars hitting a mage they caught. It angered both of us but we did not stop them. Later on back at the Keep, Justice reminded me I had a duty to help the mages. He reminded of the freedom I have and the opportunities I was given."

"So that was when you decided to merge?"

"We decided to work together to help reform as well as bring justice to every mage forced into the Circle."

"And just how did you plan to go about this crusade?" Elissa folded her arms.

"We were… going to work on that as we traveled," Anders looked away.

"Maker that is so _typical_ of you," Elissa stood up. "For as powerful and talented of a mage you are, you _never _could think ahead."

"Well when you have escaped as many times I have you learn to plan things on the road," Anders retorted.

"Anders, I've talked with Wynne about this. She said for a spirit living outside the Fade it is like being a child. Everything is black and white to them. There is _no_ middle ground. They see no grey. You must remember how Justice was even with us."

"Yes I am well aware of how Justice acted. But we were friends. I told him of my experiences in the Circle. I told him of the suicides, the rapes. I told him of that window that would reflect this beam of sunlight during the summer and how the mages took turns sitting by it. And he understood my pain and was outraged at how we have been basically treated as cursed slaves for the nearly a thousand years."

Anders watched as she wrung her hands and looked around before staring back at him. "Why did Justice sound that way…when he came out? I remember him being angry before but…that was something _more_."

"I was about to get to that," He sighed.

"I can tell by your expression that I am not going to like this," Elissa chuckled.

"Wynne was right when she said a spirit outside the Fade is like a child," Anders stood up. "All the anger and outrage I kept inside…Justice became corrupted by it. There have been some incidents like this... before."

"Oh that's just great!" Elissa stood up. "You are telling me you occasionally become an abomination now. Does Nathaniel know about this? Oghren?"

"No," Anders shook his head. "The new Warden Commander split the group up. Nathaniel travels a lot and Oghren leads expeditions in the Deeproads and works with Sigrun who has been rebuilding the Legion of the Dead."

Figuring she would eventually learn about the incident that lead to his escape to Kirkwall, Anders decided to not tell her because what she was hearing was already too much for her.

"And Jessica _is _aware of this?"

"Jessica is the one person who has helped me keep it under control. What you just witnessed is the first incident I've had in a _very long time_. She keeps me centered and balanced and I have rarely lost control since being with her."

"That's a _heavy_ burden to put on a person Anders."

"I _know_ that and it's something I live with _every day_ but I love her and she loves me. You know I already told you this but I am going to say it _again_. You showed me what it means to love somebody. I would not be with Jessica now; if it wasn't for all those talks, we had at the keep. And I could see how much Alistair loves you."

Elissa let out a heavy sigh and paced around a few times before sitting down, "And your friends know as well?"

"They all provide support in their own way."

"Even Fenris?"

"He respects Hawke and that's enough for me."

"I just _do not_ want to spend my days worrying about you and wondering if the choices I made….caused this."

"Ellie," Anders said gently. "Justice and I made this decision _after _you left. You are _not _to blame for the choices and decisions I have made."

"You are one of my best friends," Elissa said tearily. "I don't want anything to happen to you. I like Jessica. I want the both of you to be happy."

"We are happy," Anders put a hand on her shoulder. "We cherish _every_ moment we have. Jessica and I want the same for you and Alistair."

"You don't know how much I want that," Elissa sighed.

"Then when we get back you _will_ see him, and there will be tears along with a massive hug, and I foresee lots of kisses," Anders grinned.

"Can I get a bath first?" Elissa scrunched her nose. "I reek."

"We can make camp near that spring we went by," Anders helped her up. "That will at least suffice until we get back to town."

"Let's go find the others," Elissa brushed herself off. "I don't want them to think I killed you."

"They won't," Anders laughed. "Fenris will probably be disappointed though."

"I just want you to be careful. You know I support reform for the Circle. My brother has been leading the fight for the nobility to be able have mages as part of their staff again like the way it was years ago. Ferelden has always been pretty liberal. They pretty much leave the mages collective alone."

"Ferelden is on a better path but it still has a long way ago and as for that mages collective, it is just a bunch of mages with longer leashes. There might come a time where Ferelden will have to make a choice and I hope it is the right one. I will try to be careful as much as I can. That's all I can promise."

"I guess I won't say anymore then," Elissa sighed. "You were stubborn in Amaranthine and you are still stubborn."

"But I was still always your favorite," Anders winked.

"Will you stop," Elissa lips tightened to keep from laughing as they walked back to join the others.

…..

"So where is that brother of yours?" Aveline asked as entered the hall.

"What are you talking about?" Jessica shut the door. "My brother isn't here."

"Brenan told me she saw a Warden enter your estate when she was on patrol."

"Aveline the Warden she saw was not Carver," Elissa lead her to the sitting room. "She's an old friend of Anders from Amaranthine."

"She?" Aveline's eyes widened. "Are you saying the Hero of Ferelden is here? The one who conscripted him back in Amaranthine?"

"Elissa really doesn't like to be called that."

"And you are on a first name basis with her?" Aveline folded her arms. "Why didn't you tell me she was here?"

"You've been out of the city," Jessica shrugged and sat down. "She's really nice. I'd introduce you but she's doing some Warden things with Anders. Varric, Fenris, Isabela and Merrill are with her."

"So that's why it's been so quiet!" Aveline threw up her hands. "Everybody is gone. _W_hat is going on?"

"Aveline, I swear you will know _everything _once they get back," Jessica promised. "There's also something else you should know. Arl Teagan of Redcliffe is my guest. He came with Elissa and has wanted a meeting with the viscount about the refugees."

"That's the man I've seen with Bran. I don't think he's seen the viscount yet."

"Typical." Jessica sighed. "There's one more thing I need to tell you."

"Yes?"

"You know that drunk that used to be in the Hanged Man?"

"The one who used to babble about being the Prince of Ferelden you mean?" Aveline laughed.

"Yes," Elissa nodded. "It turns out he is Elissa's lost love. Anders and I helped him recover from an Olyrum addiction as well as his drinking problem. I just cut his hair earlier."

"You're joking," Aveline laughed

"He's upstairs in the West Wing, first door on the right," Elissa poured herself a glass of water. "He's asleep now so you can go take a peek if you want."

Aveline got out of her chair and left the room. Jessica heard her go up the stairs. A few minutes later, she came back in the room.

"I can't believe that's the same man that used have those drunken rants. He's clean. He actually looks…rather good."

"We haven't told him about Elissa being here. I want to wait until I know everybody's back in town."

"Well if you're helping them reunite I have every faith it will work out," Aveline smiled. "You worked your magic for Donnic and me."

"Oh come on," Jessica laughed. "I just gave the both of you a _gentle_ nudge."

"Does she know…. about Justice?"

"Anders is planning to tell her while she's here so please don't say anything."

"Oh I won't. I have to say I am looking forward to meeting her. I never saw her in Ostagar but I heard about her from some of the men. And from what I understand her brother was seriously wounded when scouting the Wilds and taken in by the Chasind."

"Anders told me he met Fergus a few times when he went to Highever with Elissa. They have a very close relationship."

"I thought Wardens were supposed to sever ties with their families."

"Apparently Elissa doesn't follow the Warden handbook," Jessica sighed. "Which means Carver could do the same thing if he wanted to."

"Has she met him?"

"She has indeed met my snot of a brother," Jessica chuckled. "Apparently in the beginning he had issues with the Warden Mages and women higher up in authority but she has worked with him and said he was an excellent Warden."

"It sounds like he's growing up."

"Yes," Jessica looked away. "I guess I should be grateful for small things."

…

A few hours later Jessica opened Alistair's door and found him walking slowly around the bed.

"You're looking better," Jessica smiled.

"You know when I was napping a little while ago I felt all this strange warmth swirling around me," Alistair sat on the bed and looked across the room at his reflection in the mirror. "It was so cleansing and soothing that it felt like I was floating in it. Then I found myself standing outside on this field and Elissa was smiling and walking towards me. She looked so beautiful but then I woke up and found Sandal looking down at me."

"Alistair I am so sorry if Sandal has bothered you. I will talk to Bhodan when he gets back."

"No. It's alright," Alistair chuckled. "I like the little guy. Seeing him has brought back…a lot of great memories."

"I'm glad," Jessica smiled. "He actually went missing during my Deep Roads Expedition and when we found him, he was surrounded by a dozen dead darkspawn and a frozen ogre. When I asked him how he did it…all he said was '_boom' _then he handed me a rune."

"Yes, Sandal always been a bit odd but quite talented."

"Indeed he is," Jessica agreed.

"Thank you for the haircut," Alistair sat up and stared at his reflection again. "You did a fairly good job. I'm beginning to feel like me again."

"You're welcome," Elissa grinned.

"Where's Teagan?" Alistair sank back against the pillows.

"He's been at the Viscount's keep trying to work out some solutions for the Ferelden refugees with the seneschal"

"That's good to know," Alistair reached for the glass and took a sip. "I had a few moments of sobriety periodically and would buy food when I came across them."

"So tell me Alistair what is the first thing you will do when you see Elissa?"

Jessica watched him stare at his reflection and then he looked at her, "I spent so long thinking she was dead. So many things are going through my mind but the first thing…I'll want to touch her, hold her…just to make sure I'm not dreaming and then I'll probably start blathering away and tell her what a fool I've been. And that all depends if she will even be willing to see me."

"Alistair something tells me you don't have anything to worry about. Now how about some lunch?"

"I don't know if I said it before but I am going to say it anyway. Thank you for helping me and yes I'd love something to eat."

"You don't have to thank me. "We are happy to help you. Now Bhodan fried some chicken before he left this morning. I will bring you some as well those cheesy mashed potatoes you like."

"Thank you," Alistair smiled. "I hope you decide to enjoy me because I am getting bored being in this room all by myself."

"I'd be delighted to join you," Jessica grinned and got up from her chair.

She hurried out of the room and to the kitchen. She could not believe how much Alistair has changed and was beginning to see why

Elissa loved him. She wanted to tell him she was here but knew it was best to wait for everyone to return.

…

Varric looked up as Elissa walked in the suite wearing her Warden armor.

"I apologize for doubting you Varric. The bathing room was clean."

"No apologies are necessary," He chuckled. "I know this place isn't what you are accustomed to but the owner gives me perks for bringing in people and the bathing room being locked is one of them."

"Varric when you've slept on a bedroll in the Deep Roads you tend to appreciate any place that has four walls, a door, and a roof." "True," Varric laughed.

"And thank you for having my armor picked up from that leather smith."

"You are quite welcome," Varric bowed. "I'm also holding a bag with some of the best gems and those runestones for you in my chest."

"Thank you," Elissa sat down and helped herself to a bottle. "Now is there something wanted to ask me Varric?"

"Actually there were two things I wanted to know," Varric set his mug down. "As someone who was born and raised on the surface, I am curious as to why a former noble turned Warden would choose Bhelen."

"I read a lot about the Dwarven Caste system and then having seen Dust Town first hand and how the nobles are so trapped in the past it was obvious change was needed. And Bhelen is a bastard but he knows surface dwarves are going to outnumber everyone in Orzammar within a decade."

"On behalf of all surface dwarves, you made the _right_ choice."

"And what was the other thing you wanted to ask me?" Elissa set her bottle down.

"What was Anders like before this…abomination thing?"

"I figured you would ask me something like this eventually," Elissa sighed.

"Well, we were sort of surprised when nothing was said when you and Anders came back from your talk."

"I can't change what Anders has done Varric and I realize he would have done it even if I hadn't left. As for how he was back in Amaranthine, Anders deflected a lot of his anger with humor. He always had his issues regarding the treatment of mages but he was not as selfless as he is now. It was about survival for him then but he was an excellent Warden and a true friend when I needed him."

"So Justice changed the selfish part of him?"

"Justice inhabited the body of an Orlesian Warden named Kristoff. He was always about doing the right thing. There was never any middle ground. Kristoff was also married and I think Justice was affected by those memories."

"So basically Justice may have been influenced by Kristoff's memories and that rubbed off on Blondie."

"Yes," Elissa nodded.

"And Blondie's anger made Justice in to this vengeance thing."

"Yes. By the way, Anders told me he has managed to stay in control since being with Jessica. Is that true?"

"The incident you just had the pleasure of being part of was the first real incident since he got together with Jessica. She does have a way of tempering that part of him."

"What are you still doing here?"  
>Elissa turned to see Anders standing in the doorway.<p>

"I was about to head out to the Gallows," Elissa stood up.

"And then you are coming straight to the estate," Anders declared. "You _need _to do this. Alistair _needs_ you and you _need_ him."

"You make it sound so easy."

"It's only difficult because you are afraid." Anders said gently.

"Have you gone back to the estate yet, Blondie?" Varric poured some water into a mug and handed to him.

"No. After I cleaned up I went straight to the clinic and had to help some people."

"I need to go to the Gallows and hand these signet rings over to the templars," Elissa opened up her pack.

"Yes," Anders agreed. "If you can get in there and a have a meeting with Meredith that would be beneficial but I am giving you a deadline. If you are _not _at the estate by this evening I _will_ search for you then put a paralyze spell on you. Afterwards Jessica and I will lock you in a room with Alistair."

"I _always_ keep my promises Anders," Elissa raised a brow. "And I already have one brother. I don't need another."

"You know you two do sort of act like siblings," Varric chuckled.

"Then go out and do what you have to do," Anders pointed to the door.

"Am I talking to Anders?" Elissa put a hand on each hip.

"Yes you are talking to me. Go to the Gallows. And I expect a full account of what happened."

"Yes Ser Anders," Elissa bowed and headed toward the door.

"Wait," Anders went over to her. "Jess and I will be there for you. You won't be alone."

"I know I'm being silly," Elissa sighed. "It's just that it has been three and half years."

"I bet you know the amount months and days since it's been," Anders teased.

"I do," Elissa laughed.

"It will fine," Anders said gently. "Now I will see you _later_."

He watched her down the stairs and then went back to Varric.

"You want me to keep an eye on her don't you Blondie?"

"I'd appreciate it. Now I better head back to the estate."  
>"Since this is going to make a fantastic story one day, I will keep an eye on her. I like her. I was expecting a female version of Stroud. It's nice to see she follows her own rules."<p>

"If Elissa had been like Stroud I would have escaped the Wardens far sooner," Anders chuckled. "I'll see you later."

….

Elissa stepped off the ferry, made her way through the Gallows, and stopped when seeing Cullen standing not far from one of the tranquil merchants.

"Warden," He looked and smiled. "It's good to see you."

"Thank you. I wish I was here just to exchange pleasantries but I have some bad news. While on a mission for my Order, I came across the remains of a dozen Templars in and around an entrance to the Deep Roads. There were some darkspawn corpses about as well. I had my men take their signet rings."

Elissa reached into her pack, took out a small sack, and handed it to Cullen. "Just know that your brothers fought bravely until the end. I wish I could have arranged to have brought back the bodies but as Wardens we are required to burn them as they could be tainted."

"Thank you Warden," Cullen sighed and looked at sadly. "I appreciate you bringing these rings back and dealing with the situation."

"We located a Darkspawn broodmother. I killed it with Dwarven explosives that caused a cave-in. There will be no more darkspawn in the area."

"Warden your dedication is truly an inspiration. I am going to speak to Knight Commander Meredith and tell her you are here. I mentioned you were in Kirkwall and I know she would be more than willing to take some time out of her schedule to see you."

"Thank you Cullen. I would love to meet her."

"I have to warn you this Circle is not like Ferelden's. We take a far more strict stance on guarding the mages."

"Cullen, as a Warden I follow a strict code of neutrality. I can guarantee you won't be hearing anything from me on how the Circle is run here."

"You've learned since the events at the Circle in Ferelden."

"You are free to assume that if you wish," Elissa looked away.

"Follow me them."

Cullen led her up the stairs and opened the gate and Elissa immediately the sound of screaming and crying as she walked down the corridor.

Two mages were chained on the wall in the far end of the room and she watched several templars lead a group of mages down the hall.

What struck her were the vacant expressions on their faces as they went past her. Having read about Kirkwall before her arrival, she knew the Gallows used to be a prison and it was obvious it had remained one.

Cullen appeared from another corridor and smiled at her. "Knight Commander Meredith dropped everything when I showed her the rings you brought. Follow me."

Going down the hall, she past several open doors, and one of them revealed a mage on all fours being whipped. The mage was a young woman looking to be in her early twenties. Red welts covered her back but the Templar struck her again.

She followed Cullen into an office where a tall woman in ornate Templar armor was looking out the window.

"Knight Commander Meredith this is Warden Elissa," Cullen said as the women turned.

Elissa looked at the women and saw a wisp of white hair sticking out her hood. She looked to be in her early fifties and her blue eyes emanated a cold sternness as they scrutinized her.

"Warden," Meredith smiled. "It's an honor to meet you. Please sit down."

"It's an honor to meet you as well," Elissa sat down.

"Thank you for bringing these rings back," Meredith looked somberly at the small sack that was on her desk. "I will make sure they are returned to their families."

"I only wish we had gotten there sooner."

"Did you by chance encounter anything inside the cave when you were there? Other bodies perhaps?"

Realizing Meredith was fishing to see if she knew about the Olyrum, Elissa decided to play along.

"There were two mutilated bodies that I presumed to be apostates. It appeared they were overcome by the darkspawn at their makeshift camp."

"Camp?" Meredith looked at her. "You mean you saw evidence of one?"

"Yes, there was debris strewn about the bodies but my priority was dealing with the darkspawn so I really didn't pay much heed to them."

"Of course," Meredith nodded. "And what became of this entrance to the Deep Roads?"

"There was a cave in after the broodmother was dealt with. _Nothing_ can come out of it now."

"That's reassuring to know. You know I had thought the Darkspawn threat ended though. You defeated the archdemon did you not?"

"Yes but the threat doesn't go away. There will always be stragglers and the occasional raid and that's where my Order comes in."  
>"You are some of the Maker's most dedicated and we appreciate you keeping the World safe for us."<p>

"As a Warden I respect the heavy burden that falls on the Templars as well."

"Cullen told me you defeated Uldred. I must say that is really impressive for someone who lacks the ability the templars have to defeat maleficars."

"I had assistance when I saved the Circle and as for my abilities all I can say is that I credit my father for that. He brought in the finest rogues that fought in the rebellion and they trained me. And when gathering an army for the Blight, I was trained by a former assassin."

"From what I read you also survived an encounter in the Fade. That is unheard considering you are _not _a mage."

"I have good mental control I guess," Elissa shrugged.

"Warden, I'm curious to know why you simply didn't choose to the Circle. You could have had the assistance of the Templars."

"It's simple; I saw those children and I knew I had to do something."

"And I understand that but sometimes sacrifices have to be made. The innocence of those children would have guaranteed them a place at the Maker's side."

"From what I heard there were about three dozen mages and a similar amount of Templars in the underground portion of Ferelden's Circle. They fought to survive _together_. During the Blight, I traveled with a senior enchanter at Ferelden's circle, Wynne. I _understand _the purpose of the circles but I just didn't think it was necessary to annul the circle because of the actions of a few."

"I know about Wynne," Meredith paced around the room. "She is an Aequitarian and led the College of Enchanters to vote _against_ independence the Libertarian fools were advocating. We admire her stance and given her age and experience, she is one of a very few mages that I harbor no issues with. She earned the freedom she has. But it's different here, I not only have to protect the citizens but I have to protect the mages from themselves."

"Perhaps I am too idealistic but I've never had any issues with the mages I've worked with."

"How many mages are in your Order?"

"I would know the exact amount but in every Keep there were around three to four. There are usually two healers and two support mages. We also occasionally employ tranquil mages for enchantments."

"And they've never ran?"

"If any mage has left the Wardens it wasn't under my watch. As Wardens, we get a stipend as well as room and board but our duty is never ending. Anyone who becomes a Warden is made instantly aware of the responsibility they have to bear."

"Has there been any Templars who have become Wardens?"

"There have been a few but from what I understand; the Wardens have been forced to use conscription because the Chantry is reluctant to release them. I know our Order would benefit from the Templars but that discussion should go to the Grand Cleric and the Divine."

"And you know Warden I think I will indeed discuss this with our Grand Cleric."

"The closest Wardens Keep is in Ansburg, and I know the Warden Commander will be happy to discuss this further," Elissa smiled. "Now I think I've taken up too much of your time and I have business to attend to."

"Will you be leaving Kirkwall soon?"

"I have a few… loose ends to deal with and the ship I came on was damaged during that storm and is undergoing repairs.'

"Are you referring to the Rowan that takes up extra spaces of our docks?"

"Yes. Arl Teagan of Redcliffe was gracious to give me passage. He's been trying to get a meeting with your Viscount to deal with the problem of our refugees but has only been able to talk with the Seneschal."

"Our viscount is a fool," Meredith declared. "I will see to it that the Arl will see him. We have enough trouble helping our own downtrodden and it would alleviate tensions in the city if some went back to Ferelden instead of constantly panhandling."

"Yes…the Maker helps those that only help themselves," Elissa said sarcastically.

"It was nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Elissa said as she noticed the greatsword hanging on the wall. It was as grand as her old Vigilance sword but there was something odd about the red glow that emanated from it.

"That is a magnificent greatsword you have hanging on the wall. The workmanship is unlike anything I have ever seen. It looks enchanted too."

"Thank you," Meredith grinned coyly. "It's a special enchantment and of course we _cannot_ reveal our secrets."

"I understand," Elissa nodded. "Goodbye."  
>"Maker's blessings…Warden."<p>

Cullen looked up and smiled at her when he saw her walking towards him, "I hope your meeting with the Knight Commander went well."

"It was…very interesting. She's very steadfast in her beliefs."

"Yes she is," Cullen nodded as they walked toward the entrance.

"Conscript me."

Elissa turned to see a man in worn robe standing before her. He looked gaunt, his face was bruised and his eyes conveyed desperation.

"Go back to your room Micah," Cullen pointed to the corridor.

Micah dropped to his knees and grabbed Elissa's hand. "Please conscript me."

Two Templars grabbed Micah and dragged him away as he started to scream.

"Conscript me!"

He kept crying out those two words to the point where Elissa had enough and she ran out only stopping to catch her breath when she reached the dock to the ferry.

"Warden I'm so sorry you had to be part of that," Cullen caught up with her.

"Sorry?" Elissa laughed. "That mage was begging to be conscripted. Those two chained to the wall looked like they were twenty years old. I understand why mages are in the Circle but this is inhumane and barbaric."

"Mages can't be treated like normal people," Cullen insisted. "Discipline is needed for their own benefit."

"Please tell me _where_ it says in the Chant you treat mages this way because I really want to know."

"You don't understand," Cullen glared. "You didn't go through what I did."

"I understand _more_ than you think," Elissa retorted. "What I see is a man who wants revenge. You are taking out your anger on these mages over what happened to you. Now I know what Uldred did was horrible. I was _there_. Your bitterness over those events is making you no better than him. Now I kept my promise and did _not _interfere but from my experiences, people can only take so much abuse before they cannot take anymore. You might want to remember that."

Elissa got on the ferry and it sailed away not realizing she was heading to the docks.

…..

"I'm so happy you're back," Jessica put her arms around Anders as he pulled her close to him.

"It's good to be home Love," Anders kissed her. "I have so much to tell you but we're going to have to make it fast. Elissa is coming here this evening."

"Are you certain?" Jessica's eyes widened. "Alistair is doing so remarkably, he's actually been walking around now. He's even expressed a desire to see her but I haven't told him she's actually here."

"I told her that we would hunt her down and lock her in a room with Alistair if she didn't show up. I _know _she will show up and I have Varric keeping a close eye on her."

"Should we tell him?"

"Yes but _not_ until the last moment, I don't want him to get worked up because Ellie is anxious as it is. She went to go see the Knight Commander but will be here this evening."

"Why is Ellie seeing the Knight Commander?"

"We found where they making the Olyrum. The Templars were dead and we also had to deal with a broodmother."

"Maker! I remember you describing them to me," Jessica covered her mouth.

"It was horrible," Anders said somberly. "Merrill threw up when seeing it. Its dead now and that entrance to the Deep Roads is permanently blocked off."

"I'm certainly relieved everyone came out of this alive but that doesn't explain why Ellie is seeing the Knight Commander."

"When we escaped the Deep Roads after the cave in, we ran right into a group of Templars obviously looking for their friends. Remember that one female Templar in Sundermount that you dealt with? She was there as well and well…" Anders looked away. "I sort of…lost control."

"Oh Maker," Jessica shook her head. "Ellie knows about Justice then. How did she take it?"

"Ellie took it as well as I expected. She fainted but after coming to, we had a long talk and I told her how that was the first time I lost control in a long time and I explained how you are my source of strength and help keep me balanced."

"I _will_ talk to her about this," Jessica promised. "I presumed she wanted to let the Knight Commander know about the deaths."

"Ellie has their signet rings," Anders explained. "And she possesses a great amount of cunning which will enable her to explain everything."

"I admit it would be nice to know what Meredith is like but I really _want_ to see Alistair and Ellie reunited. I spent a lot of time talking with him and just hearing the stories of their travels, he loves her so much."

"How did you get to be such a romantic?" Anders smiled and caressed her cheek.

"It's easy when you had parents like mine," Jessica kissed him. "And of course I am madly in love with a sexy revolutionist."

"I love you too," Anders kissed her. "So what is Alistair doing now?"

"He's upstairs reading. I cut his hair and he's in some clothes Teagan brought for him."

"I think I'll go upstairs and examine him."

"I'm going to go in the kitchen and make us some sandwiches," Jessica smiled.

"Sounds good," Anders smiled. "I'll try not to be long."

…

"The Warden looks distressed," Fenris observed.

"That was easy to figure out when she got on the wrong ferry," Varric said as he watched her wander around the docks.

"Aveline asked me to check something that her guards do not have access too," Fenris said he turned the other direction.

"Hope she is paying you," Varric chuckled as he continued to follow Elissa.

Elissa walked past the ships and walked out onto the big dock.

"Sod it," Varric muttered to himself as he decided to make his presence known.

The sun was slowly starting to set as he approached Elissa.

"Anders didn't have to get you to follow me," Elissa turned to him.

"He just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Alright," Elissa chuckled and shook her head. "I saw two mages chained to a wall, another one being whipped, and when I was leaving one of them grabbed me and begged to be conscripted. And Knight Commander Meredith was fishing for information the whole time but she believed all my lies about what happened."

"Well that is good news at least."

"You know Varric every single female Templar I have encountered in my travels have been complete zealots that you could barely reason with. Meredith is even worse. There is something about her that unnerves me."

"Yes, I've heard a great deal about Meredith and her policies. And Ellie, I really hope you give a toned down version to Anders."

"That's what I've been agonizing over," Ellie laughed. "There is _no_ way I can tell him what I saw."

"Think of it as saving Anders from himself. You are a rogue. Just tell him what he already assumes without going into details. The truth will come out eventually but it doesn't need to be now."

"I could do that," Elissa agreed. "I could also tell Jessica when he's not around."

"Hawke would understand and appreciate you not telling Anders."

"I can't wait to escape from all of this," Elissa sighed.

"Sounds like you're planning an early retirement."

"That's part of the plan."

"I'm definitely glad I saved you a sack of gems and trinkets from the chest. I'm aware the Wardens don't offer a retirement plan."

"No," Elissa chuckled. "It's not the type of retirement plan most would want. It is just so strange. Before my family was murdered, I wanted adventure. I wanted make the world a better place. I have seen enough to last me three lifetimes. I'm done."

"Isn't it time you have your happy ending then?" Varric grinned.

"I better head out but I'm using the stairs if you still plan on following me."

"I figured you would be doing that," Varric laughed.

"Is there a special someone in your life?"

"There…was someone a long time ago," Varric looked away. "I just have my friends now and keeping an eye on them is a twenty four a day job."

"Well Varric, I have to say you are one of a kind. Don't ever change."

"Thank you my lady," Varric bowed.

As they made their way up the stairs, they slowed down when seeing three Qunari standing with Fenris.

"These qunari want to speak with the Warden," Fenris said.

"What can I do for you?" Elissa acknowledged them politely.

"The Arishok wishes to see you_. Now_," the Qunari in the middle broke the silence.

"You better see him Warden," Fenris cautioned.

"You know you can call me by my given name Fenris," Elissa shook her head. "And I have had dealings with the Qunari before."

Elissa turned towards the compound as Fenris and Varric glanced worriedly at each other.

A large group of Qunari converged toward her as Elissa made her way towards the middle.

The Arishok sat silently watching her and she stopped before the steps that lead up to him.

"You are the Warden," He broke his silence.

"Arishok," Elissa bowed. "I am indeed a Warden."

"No you are the Warden who found the lost sword. You are the Warden that defied all the odds, united the people of your country, and defeated the Blight."

"I didn't do it alone. I had help. How did you know I was here?"

"Some of the men on the ship you arrived on speak in very loud voices."

"Is there something you needed assistance with?"

"I see you know some of Hawke's friends. I am impressed. I can use your assistance in a matter."

The Arishok nodded his head as a hornless Qunari came out of the shadows. Two other Qunari handed him weapons and they stood silently watching her.

**"**This Tal-Vashoth wishes to submit to the Qun again and you are going to help me see if they're worthy."

"You want me to fight him?"

"I wish to see if those tales about the Wardens are true," The Arishok sat down and raised his arm. "_Ataash Qunari_**!"**

Elissa withdrew her swords as the Tal-Vashoth lunged for her.

…..

Varric and Fenris watched as the first blow of the Tal-Vashoth sword knocked Elissa back. He was at least three feet taller than she was and outweighed her by a large margin.

"This is not good," Varric said worriedly. "Ellie is not in the frame of mind to fight.

"She's holding her own so far," Fenris said as he watched the fight.

Elissa managed to block his hits and circle around him managing one hit in the back of his thigh. The Tal-Vashoth yelled and whirled around, knocking her to the ground.

"She stood up and tumbled away when he lunged toward her again. Back and forth they fought, her finesse enabling her to dodge most of his attempts.

"I thought you had to do something for Aveline Broody," Varric said as fumbled in his pack for a flask.

"I did," Fenris replied. "I found the information for Aveline but was curious to see if you were still following her and went downstairs. That was when they stopped me."

"Hawke is going to love this," Varric shook his head.

"Why are you so worried? She's quite skilled from what I see."

"Maybe I am worrying too much," Varric, said he watched her fight.

Elissa stunned the Tal-Vashoth and stopped to catch her breath. Sensing his approach she whirled away but his right sword got her. Varric winced when seeing the blade go through her left side a little bit above the waist. The Tal-Vashoth pulled it out and she dropped to her knees as he started to yell something in his language.

The Tal-Vashoth continued to yell and raise his arms turning in time to see Elissa kick him. He stumbled back and as he was trying to get his balance back, she continued to strike at him managing to know one of the swords out of his hands and slicing his other arm. She kicked him again and he fell to the ground and just as she was about to finish him the Arishok yelled and got up from his seat. He walked over towards the Tal-Vashoth picking up one of his swords.

"_Ebost issala!" _The Arishok plunged the sword into the chest of the Tal-Vashoth.

"What does that mean?" Varric looked at Fenris.

"Return to Dust," Fenris watched Elissa clutched her side but managed to stand up.

"Let me guess," Elissa looked at the Arishok. "He was willing to fight me, I put him down but you have enough respect for him to end his life."

"Panahedan Warden. It is obvious your abilities were not exaggerated. And the respect you've showed for others not of your kind is admirable."

Elissa nodded and made her way to Varric and Fenris.

"Let's get you out of here and cleaned up," Varric said as he took her arm and Fenris took the other. They lead her outside near a few stalls.

"You're losing a lot blood," Fenris looked down at the trail of blood she was leaving.

"There's an elfroot salve in my pack," Elissa grimaced. "And some cotton. Give them to me."

Fenris fumbled around in her pack and handed them to her and watched as she coated the cotton with salve, then take a deep breath before sticking it in the bleeding wound on her side.

She cried out but quickly regained her composure looking at both Varric and Fenris, "The Sten I traveled with wasn't nearly as tall when I fought him."

"That thing you did with the cotton is something Anders does," Varric marveled.

"It was something he taught me back in Amaranthine," Elissa wiped her face and tied her hair back as they cleaned her off. "This will slow the bleeding and help me make it to the estate. Do I… look alright?"

"You looked bloody and exhausted before now you look exhausted," Varric said.

"I don't give compliments very often but you are a very lovely woman Ward…I mean Elissa," Fenris looked down at the ground.

"What he says is true," Varric laughed. "He rarely

gives compliments."

"Why thank you Fenris," Elissa smiled weakly.

"What do you want us to do?" Varric asked.

"Just make sure I don't fall over," Elissa winced.

"I guess what they say about Warden stamina is true," Fenris remarked as she watched them go up the stairs.

…

Anders watched as Alistair walked down the stairs. Dressed in clothes, he no longer looked like the unkempt drunk that sat in the Hanged Man. As they shared a platter of sandwiches, they talked and Anders could not help but like him. Alistair talked about how he would have escaped the Templars if he had not been conscripted. He talked about his childhood, talked about being saved by Duncan and he talked about falling in love with Elissa. He was smart, funny, and as self-deprecating as Elissa described. And the grumbling Justice felt quickly dissipated when Alistair said he wanted to make things right.

"So where have you been the last few days Anders?" Alistair asked. "Working at the clinic?"

Anders looked at Jessica and then at Alistair, "I was helping the Wardens."

"Really?" Alistair's eyes widened. "I thought you quit."

"I did but this Warden I consider a _dear_ friend."

"That's very good of you Anders," Alistair nodded approvingly. "I would never judge you for leaving. I mean I abandoned the Order. And it is something I need to rectify. It's good to know you are willing to help your brothers."

"And sisters," Jessica chimed in.

"I'm glad Teagan finally got a meeting with the Viscount," Alistair set his glass down.

"I was about ready to go to the keep myself and use what influence I have," Jessica chuckled.

"And you would have gotten him that meeting," Anders looked out the window.

It was evening and Elissa still had not arrived but she said she would be here so he was going to give her more time

"Alistair, how about a walk outside? You have been in this house for weeks. As your healer I think it would be good for you."

"Sure," Alistair stood up. "I don't think I ever saw Hightown."

"Well, everything is closed up for the evening but we can certainly go for a stroll," Jessica looked at Anders.

Outside they walked slowly around Hightown with Jessica showing Alistair the area and Anders looking around. Just then, Fenris appeared around the corner and ran towards them.

"This is Fenris," Jessica smiled. "What brings you here?"

"Hello Fenris," Alistair held out his hand.

Surprised, Fenris shook his hand and nodded then looked at Jessica, "I _need_ a word with you."

Anders watched as Fenris pulled Jessica away and whispered in her ear. Her gasp was loud enough for him to take notice.

"Let's head back to estate," Jessica pulled Anders aside as Alistair walked towards the estate.

"What is it?" Anders said in a low voice.

"The Qunari stopped her as they were heading back. He wanted to see Elissa fight. She's coming but she's…"

"Maker!" Anders shook his head and caught up with Alistair.

As they reached the estate, he caught site of Elissa and Varric coming the other direction. She was walking slowly and the light from the street lamps revealed how pale she was.

"Alistair there is something we need to tell you," Anders motioned for him to slow down.

"Sure. What is it?"

"You know that Warden I helped?"

"Alistair."

Anders watched his eyes widened. He blinked once and slowly turned sucking in air as he laid eyes on Elissa.

"The Warden I helped was Elissa," Anders said gently. "And she has wanted to see you as much as you have wanted to see her."

Alistair and Elissa just looked at each other as if not believing what they were seeing. Anders looked at the bloody cotton that was sticking out of her side. Her breathing labored and pale from the loss of blood, Elissa stepped closer to him.

"I can't believe….I thought you were dead until they told me you were alive but a part of me is still thinking this is a dream."

"I'm right here," Elissa blinked away tears as she smiled.

"You lied….for me… after I _abandoned _you."

"I did."

"I was such a fool."

"You were," Elissa chuckled and brushed away a tear with a finger

Anders watched as Elissa stumbled and Alistair caught her in his arms closing his eyes when feeling her arms go around him.

"This was…not how I wanted to see you," Elissa said weakly.

"Ellie?" Alistair felt her go limp and he cried out when finally seeing the wound on her side. "Ellie!"

"Anders!" Alistair picked her up and rushed over to him. "What happened to her?"

"Get her in the estate Alistair," Anders looked at the wound.

"She fought a Qunari," Varric said.

"A Tal-Vashoth actually," Fenris corrected. "The Arishok requested to see her."

"But why would she do that?" Alistair lamented. "No…forget I said that is something she _would_ do."

"Alistair, get her inside and upstairs," Jessica said gently. "Anders and I will tend to her and then I will go speak with the Arishok later."

Jessica shook her head and watched as Anders held the door open as Alistair carried her inside.

….

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**A/N**: **_Sorry to my loyal readers…I know I'm not making this reunion easy._**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"What is taking so long?" Alistair paced around the room as Teagan and Varric watched him.

"I'm sure she'll be fine Al," Varric took a drink from his flask and put it back in his pack. "Anybody who can shove a piece of cotton into a wound then walk from the docks to Hightown is _not_ going to die."

"Alistair, she's going to be _alright_," Teagan said gently. "Elissa is a strong woman and she's been through worse."

"Yes and I wasn't there for it," Alistair leaned again against the wall.

Anders and Jessica came in the room looking relieved.

"She's going to be fine," Jessica smiled.

"The sword did not hit anything vital and it went straight in then out. She lost a lot of blood, had six broken ribs, and is suffering from mild shock but she'll be fine," Anders sighed.

"Thank you. Thank you both," Alistair hugged each of them. "Can I see her?"

"Yes," Anders nodded. "The wound is healed but I put a sleep spell on her because she _needs _the rest and it will help her build back her blood quicker."

Alistair left the room and they heard him race up the stairs and the door close.

"I'm going to speak with the Arishok," Jessica poured herself a glass of water and then set the pitcher down.

"You know he's just going to give you the run around Hawke," Varric chuckled. "He'll spout off a diatribe about the Qun, honor, and respect."

"Yes but I am going _anyway_," Jessica frowned. "How did he even know Elissa was here? And what was the point?"

"He mentioned something about the men from the ship talking loud," Varric looked at Teagan.

"Maker," Teagan groaned and his shook his head. "They were told to keep quiet about her."

"It's _not_ your fault Teagan," Jessica said. "I've learned from experience that most secrets eventually come out.

"And you know the Arishok," Varric chuckled. "There is a reason for everything he does. Had Elissa walked away, it could have had added to the tensions in the city."

"Why are the Qunari even here?" Teagan asked.

"Their ship ran aground the same time my family came here," Jessica explained. "I've helped the Arishok before in order to maintain the peace in Kirkwall. They say a ship is coming but it's beginning to become clear that there is _more_ to it."

"I'm exhausted," Anders sighed. "Elissa is not going to wake up for the time being so I am going to take a nap."

"I'll see you later," Jessica kissed Anders after he shook hands with Teagan then headed up the stairs.

"The viscount invited me to dine with him," Teagan reached for his coat.

"And what do you think of Viscount Dumar Teagan?" Varric grinned. "And don't worry you won't offend me."

"Good to know," Teagan replied as he put on his coat. "He's amiable enough but our queen would chew him up then spit him out. When I was talking to him, there… were some moments when I got the impression he would rather be somewhere else. He does love his son though so I'll give him credit for that."

"That is pretty much how most of everybody views him," Jessica chuckled. "Just let yourself in when you've returned from the keep."

"Thank you," Teagan smiled. "Your hospitality and friendship is truly appreciated."

"It's my pleasure," Jessica smiled.

Varric and Jessica watched him leave the room and heard the door close.

"Hawke this is something that I need to tell you and its good Blondie isn't here to here."

"I figured you had something to tell me," Jessica looked at Varric.

"Ellie was very upset after her meeting with Knight Commander Meredith and mentioned witnessing some pretty horrible things when she was in there. She said she was going to tell you when Anders wasn't around and I told her you would appreciate that."

"I'll definitely have to talk to her when she's well. Did she tell you anything?"

"Let's just say it's for the _best_ that she doesn't tell Blondie," Varric looked at her somberly. "And consider yourself fortunate that you have your wealth and enough pull with the Viscount to be safe."

"Alright then," Jessica grabbed her staff. "Guess it's for the best I don't know for now. Let us go have a talk with the Arishok. I'll buy you a drink afterwards."

"I'm expecting you to," Varric chuckled as they left the estate.

….

Anders woke up from his nap, immediately went to Elissa's room, and could not help but smile when seeing Alistair sleeping beside her.

Heading downstairs, he found Orana watering the plants. When seeing him she looked up and smiled, "Did you have a nice nap Master Anders?"

"Yes I did thank you," Anders smiled.

Helping himself to an apple, he headed to the sitting room to relax and wait for Jessica.

"Anders?" Alistair appeared in the doorway. "Ellie is still asleep. Shouldn't she be awake by now?"

"Alistair she lost over half of her blood," Anders motioned for him to sit down. "Her wounds are healed but she needs the rest to build up her blood. As she regains her strength, the spell will wear off and she'll wake up."

"She will wake up then?

"Yes," Anders said reassuringly. "You will have that second reunion."

"I still don't understand why she fought the Qunari," Alistair sank back into the chair. "Even when I wasn't sober I saw that they were bigger than Sten."

"You know Elissa," Anders shook his head.

"Yes," Alistair sighed. "I do."

"I just want to say I'm sorry we kept this from you. You weren't in the best frame of mind in the beginning and we thought it was for the best."

"You did the right thing by not telling me," Alistair closed his eyes. "I definitely would not have been able to handle it. I'm surprised I held together when I heard her say my name. Hearing Ellie's sweet Highever accent it and then seeing her, I just felt complete again."

"Ellie was worried you would reject her. It took some time for her to muster the nerve and I still had to give her a push."

"My anger turned to regret as soon as that ship I got on sailed out of Denerim and then I spent the last three years drinking my grief away when I thought she was dead. I still can't believe she was actually looking for me."

"Ellie never stopped loving you Alistair," Anders smiled.

"And I never stopped loving her. I just want to make things right with everything."

"You will," Anders smiled.

Jessica and Varric appeared in the room looking windblown and concerned.

"We have a problem," Varric shook his head.

"What is it?" Anders got up from his chair and went over to Jessica. "Is it the arishok?"

"No. My chat with the arishok was a waste of time of course," Hawke shook her head. "Although he did say he respected Elissa for the respect she showed. A Dalish scout approached us from Merrill's clan. They're under siege by a group of a darkspawn."

"The elf said that the keeper and her second has them bunkered down but they're not going to last," Varric added.

"Maker," Anders shook his head.

"Is there something I can do to help?"

Anders looked at Jessica then back at him, "You mentioned wanting to make things right. How about coming to help?"

"Two Wardens would be a tremendous help," Jessica smiled.

"You can show us how it's done," Varric winked.

"I don't want to leave Elissa," Alistair looked away. "And I don't have any armor or weapons."

"Actually, that's _not_ true."

They turned to see Teagan standing in the doorway.

"I don't think Elissa will mind if I had that chest brought in from the chest. I will have my men retrieve it."

Teagan turned and headed back toward the hall presumably to talk to his men.

"Ellie is going to be sleeping for quite a while and you would be helping us if you came," Anders said encouragingly.

"I think Ellie would want you to go," Jessica gave him a hopeful smile.

"In case you were thinking of asking, you are well enough to fight although the trek there and back is a pain in the ass but we'll rest when you need it," Anders looked at Alistair.

"We won't let you over exert yourself," Jessica added.

"Since you two are not going to allow me to say no I will go with you on the condition that I am allowed to help coordinate the battle and we leave right _after_ it."

Anders and Jessica looked at each other then back at Alistair.

"Of course you can help," Anders said reassuringly.

"Good. Then it is settled," Jessica brushed the hair out of her face. "We've sent word to some of our friends. They're going to meet us in a few hours by the city gates. I'll pack some food and some extra gear for you."

"Just one more thing," Alistair turned to Anders. "If Ellie wakes up when we're gone how will she be physically?"

"Alistair she'd _never_ leave," Anders chuckled. "And even if the thought crossed her mind to come to Sundermount, Ellie took a good thrashing from that Qunari and was fairly bruised in the process. She's going to be very sore."

"I'm going to leave her a note and one of my dresses," Jessica said as she was making out a list. "We look like we're close to the same size and she can wear it while her armor is being repaired. And I will tell her to make herself at home."

"Ellie is going to be annoyed with me," Anders laughed. "This is not the first time I put her under a sleep spell. She collapsed right after dealing with that insane sentient broodmother in Amaranthine. She had eight broken ribs, a punctured lung, and a broken wrist."

"Sentient?" Alistair's eyes widened. "Are you saying…?"

"Yes," Anders nodded. "It talked. I will tell you about as we make the trek. Now let's grab a bite while you're waiting for Teagan."

"Don't eat too much," Jessica called after them. "I want to take some with us.

…..

An hour later Alistair knelt down by the chest, Teagan had brought and looked at as Teagan & Alistair looked on. His hands shaking, he opened it and pulled out the armor.

"Elissa mentioned having that made to match the size of your other armor."

Alistair touched the Griffith quest, "I remember seeing two Wardens wearing this type of armor. I overheard them talking about how making a Loghain into a Warden was a smart move."

Reaching into the chest, he gasped when seeing Duncan's shield and Starfang, the two items he left behind when leaving Denerim.

"She _never _stopped believing in you Alistair," Teagan said gently. "And neither did I. Ellie asked me to look after your sword and shield when she had to attend to the darkspawn threat in Amaranthine. I brought them with me when we were preparing set sail for Kirkwall and she placed them in the chest."

Gathering the armor he looked up at them, "I'm going to change."

Anders and Teagan watched as he left the room and heard him go up the stairs.

"Are you sure he'll be alright?" Teagan looked at Anders with concern.

"Alistair will be fine. He's gained most of his weight back and needs to expel all that pent up energy he's stored up from being in bed all this time. This will be good for him. Jess and I _will _keep an eye on him."

"I'll keep an eye on Elissa although I suspect that won't be easy," Teagan chuckled.

"Don't worry," Anders laughed. "The only person she'll be annoyed with is me."

…

Alistair bent down, kissed Elissa on the cheek, and watched as she stirred.

"I'm going to come back to you," He promised. "And I'm going to make things right."

Caressing her cheek, he turned and left the room.

…

"I can't believe that drunk is coming with us," Fenris growled.

"Broody, he's not the same guy who puked on you all those months ago," Varric chuckled

"Fenris, if it's one thing I know you never forget to fight." Isabela turned to him. "You weren't there when I saw him defend Norah after that one drunk shoved her."

"Did he throw up on him?" Fenris scowled.

"No," Isabela laughed. "He struck him with a tray and then smited him across the room."

"He did throw up afterwards if I remember," Varric added.

"Oh…my…word," Isabela remarked when seeing Anders, Hawke and Alistair walking towards them. "He does clean up rather nicely."

"Sorry we're late," Hawke said between breaths.

"Looking good Al," Varric grinned. "With your new found sobriety you may not remember these two. That sexy one over there without the pants is Isabela and the elf brooding at you is Fenris."

"Fenris was just questioning your ability to fight," Isabela remarked.

"You have a problem with me Fenris?" Alistair looked at him.

"I was just concerned considering your prior condition of vomiting on one's feet."

"Maybe I should show you what I'm capable of," Alistair withdrew his sword and shield.

"Can we please save this for the darkspawn," Hawke shook her head as Anders pulled her away

"This should only take a moment," Fenris withdrew his greatsword.

"For the love of the Maker! Please! Don't do this," Hawke protested.

"Let them get it out of their system Hawke," Varric chuckled.

"Let them do it love," Anders put his arm around her. "I have faith that Alistair will show Fenris what he's made of."

"This should be good," Isabela licked her lips.

They moved away and watched as Fenris and Alistair circled each other.  
>"Hurry up and switch on Fenris," Isabela called.<p>

"If I did that Hawke would kill me," Fenris grunted as he dodged Alistair's shield.

"Don't hold back on my account," Alistair growled as blocked a hit.

Fenris smiled and his markings immediately lit up. If Alistair was surprised, he did not show it but when he lunged toward Fenris and was instantly knocked to the ground when his markings pulsed.

"Nice trick," Alistair said as he stood up. "I can do something similar."

Blocking Fenris's hits with his shield Alistair wouldn't let up and smited him to the ground when he was close enough.

Anders stifled a laugh as Fenris glared and brushed himself off while Hawke angrily went between them.

"Enough!" She glared. "You two have proven yourselves. We're _wasting _time.

"Are you snorting Lyrium?" Fenris asked. "I though Templars had that ability.

"I trained as a Templar before being recruited to the Wardens," Alistair looked at Fenris. "If I had been using lyrium it would have hurt far _more_."

Anders watched as Alistair walked toward the gate. Elissa had told him of his abilities and now he had seen it firsthand making him wonder if how many other things the Chantry has fabricated to keep their power.

"Hawke, you are no fun," Isabela sighed.

"I know and I promise I will make up it to you," Jess chuckled. "Now let's go."

"Better watch out for those promises Hawke," Varric laughed as they went past the gates.

….

"Alistair," Elissa opened her eyes and blinked at the figure until realizing it was Sandal looking down at her.

"Enchantment," Sandal clapped his hands.

Earlier she dreamt that she enveloped in warmth. It glowed and swirled around her then went through her as she stood on a field. Alistair was in the distance, holding his arms out. The warmth changed to a cleansing breeze as she floated towards him. Just as they were about to touch hands she was pulled away and everything went black until she opened her eyes.

"Sandal," Elissa winced as she got out of bed and put on the robe that was lying on the bed. Noticing the note pinned on the dark green dress that was lying on a chair; she went over to read it.

_ "Ellie, I am so sorry Alistair is not here for you but this Dalish clan we know were battling darkspawn and sent for help. Alistair reluctantly agreed to go with us after Anders told him he was well enough to fight. And believe me; he did __**not**__ want to leave your side. We will be back as soon we deal with this. Please make yourself at home. Your armor is being repaired so I want you to have this dress to wear when you feel up to getting dressed. If you need anything do not hesitate to ask Bhodan or Orana."_

_ Jess_

"Oh for the love of the Maker!" Elissa shook her head. "This blasted town!"

"The bad lady scares me," Sandal tugged at her arm.

"You've seen Meredith?" Elissa looked at him seeing the fright in his eyes. "She scares me too Sandal."

"It's going to come," Sandal said. "And the world will change."

"What is coming?" Elissa looked at him.

"Queen," Sandal pointed to her.

"No," Elissa chuckled and shook her head. "I just want a life away from the Wardens with Alistair."

"King," Sandal grinned and skipped out of the room.

"Maker's breath! You're finally awake," Teagan rushed in the room. "I saw Sandal skipping down the stairs and thought I should check on you. How are you feeling?"

"A bit sore and annoyed that Anders put one of his sleep spells on me," Elissa looked at her reflection in the mirror. "How long have I been asleep?"

"Three and a half days."

"Well at least it didn't beat the record of the last time," Elissa laughed.

"This has happened before?"

"Drake's Fall," Elissa looked away. "I made it all the way back to Vigil's Keep and collapsed when seeing the keep was the only thing still standing. Anders healed me but he put me under a sleep spell and I woke up in a tent five days later."

"Why in the Maker's name did you fight a Qunari?" Teagan folded his arms. "They don't even look like the one you traveled with."

"One thing I learned during my travels is you don't say no to a Qunari and you especially don't say no to the Arishok. And you're right, they most definitely are not like my Sten," Elissa sighed. "I was not in the best frame of mind to fight after my visit with the Knight Commander."

"I should have known it was you," Teagan smiled. "The viscount mention something about the Knight Commander urging him to see me."

"Glad she kept her word but Knight Commander Meredith has a very dark soul and the Gallows…" Elissa looked up at Teagan. "Connor is fortunate to at a Circle that does not chain up their mages or beat them."

"What did you see?" Teagan's eyes widened. "Are you hungry? I can have Bhodan bring some food up and we can talk."

"I'm starving but I need to get out of this room and move around a bit. Can you help me downstairs?"

"Of course," Teagan took her arm and helped her out the room.

…

A couple of hours after eating, Elissa stepped out of the bathing room and slowly made her back down the stairs. Despite being a tad snug in the bodice, the dress Jessica had given her fit. She enjoyed the freedom that wearing a dress gave her.

"Well look at you," Teagan looked from the boxes he was going through. "I do believe this is the third time I've seen you in a dress."

"You are correct," Elissa laughed. "I wore a dress to Fergus's wedding and then your wedding to Bella. Unfortunately this ensemble wouldn't work when it comes to fighting darkspawn."

"Well you look lovely my lady," Teagan bowed his head.

"Thank you," Elissa smiled. "So what are in these crates? Supplies?"

"I was so outraged by the things you told me and dealing with the Viscount made me realize I needed to do _more_. Jessica told me of a woman she helps. Her name is Lirene and she has gone out of her way to help the refugees here. I've arranged for her to come by with some people to pick up these supplies and hopefully she'll agree to help find the people who do want to come back to Ferelden and I can make arrangements for those ships when we get back."

"Well it's reassuring to know some Kirkwallers do care," Elissa sighed. "You know when I first started exploring the area I saw some chantry sister soliciting in Lowtown. I traveled a lot in the nearly four years since the Blight and I was the first time I witnessed something like that. They don't even do that in Orlais."

"Free Marchers have always had their own way of thinking."

"Well one day it's going to come back to haunt them," Elissa looked away. "I'm happy we found Alistair and I like Jessica and her friends I've met so far but I don't like Kirkwall."

"I don't either," Teagan agreed. "It's changed since I was a child. Even the nobles here are an arrogant lot."

"I'll be happy to help you when they come by," Elissa sank back in her chair. "I can't stand doing nothing."

"They will be back," Teagan said reassuringly. "Alistair will be ecstatic to see you. He stayed by your side until Anders and Jessica asked him to join them."

"I'm actually glad he did go with them," Elissa admitted.

"Alistair gave two conditions before he agreed to do go," Teagan set his glass down. "He insisted that they leave immediately afterwards and also wanted to help coordinate the battle."

"He did?" Elissa sat up and smiled. "I _knew_ he always had it in him. Even during the Blight when we traveled there were a few times I'd pretend to not be feeling well and let him take over as I would drop back to support with my bow."

"It didn't help that my family failed him," Teagan sighed.

"Teagan I know you were the one who paid your brother's men to keep him fed and look after him when you weren't around. You did the best you can and that is all anybody could ask for. The only persons I blame are Maric and you brother. One of them is dead and Eamon hates me so it doesn't matter anymore."

"Eamon doesn't hate you," Teagan chuckled. "Now Isolde does hate you."

"She just holds a grudge because I stopped you from marrying that countess," Elissa laughed.

"And I will forever be grateful," Teagan grinned. "I love my life with Bella and Robert."

"If I may ask are you hoping for another boy?"

"Honestly I don't care what it is," Teagan said. "I do know if it's a girl Bella wants to name her Rowan Elissa Guerrin."

"I'm honored to have my name next to your sister's," Elissa smiled.

"You've done so much for us and Bella regards you like a sister."

"I feel the same way for her. And I happy that the people of Redcliffe have you and an Arlessa they can _love_."

"Excuse me your grace but Lirene is here."

Teagan and Elissa turned to see Ser Perth smiling at them.

"Thank you," Teagan stood up as Ser Perth and another one of his men came in the room to get the crates.

"It will be nice to get some air," Elissa stood up and took Teagan's arm.

…

"It's an honor to meet you Warden," Lirene said as she took stock of everything before having her men place each crate in the wagon. "And thank you Arl Teagan, with these supplies and what Messere Hawke provides for us we have enough to care for everyone."

"We're happy to help," Teagan smiled. "And thank you for agreeing to help get the word out about the ships that will be coming to give passage to any Ferelden citizen who wants to go home."

"I will post these notices in my shop as soon as we get back," Lirene promised.

"Do you have to do this here?"

Elissa turned to see a young noble woman with black hair glaring at her.

Folding her arms Elissa scowled she walked over to her.

…

"I should have known the ruins were cause of that," Jessica sighed as she walked up the steps to Hightown with Anders. Alistair was several steps ahead but stumbled back just as they caught up to him.

"Alistair, you took quite a hit from that ogre," Anders said as he steadied him. "We should have stayed longer at the Hanged Man after we cleaned up."

"I brought that ogre down didn't I?" Alistair said between breaths. "I just want to see Ellie."

"You did a wonderful job coordinating," Jessica patted him on the back. It made sense for Anders and Varric to flank them from the other side."

"We collapsed the hole in the ruins and helped with casualties," Anders replied. "Marethari was certainly appreciative."

As they made their way through the marketplace, they suddenly heard the yelling.

"That sounds like…," Anders looked toward the estate.

"Ellie," Alistair brushed past them and headed towards the crowd.

….

Jessica and Anders made their way down path and saw the crowd

near the estate. Lirene was standing with Teagan and with some of her workers while crates were being stacked in a wagon. Jessica saw Ellie yelling at Francine McRae and was not surprised. Back when she was poor, Francine would look down upon her if she came to Hightown and only became polite to her when she bought the estate.

"Teagan must have arranged for supplies for Lirene," Jessica remarked and "And Francine opened her mouth."

Anders looked at Alistair and saw that his eyes were fixed on Ellie and it reminded him of the times before he would look at Jessica before he got together with her.

"You have a problem with the poor?"

Francine backed away from Elissa and began to look like she was wishing she had not opened her mouth.

"Does Kirkwall have its own special version of the Chant that disavows the downtrodden?"

"No," Francine shrugged.

"When was the last time you attending the services at the Chantry or even made the effort to help your own people let alone my people?  
>"I…I…." Francine muttered.<p>

"Just as I thought. You are just another Free Marcher who has forgotten there is a big world out there and sometimes we all have to _help each other. _There is going to come a time when Kirkwall will _need _help and you better pray to the Maker that people are compassionate enough to forget your snobbish attitude."

"That's the Warden from Ferelden," A nobleman realized. "That's the one who saved Ferelden and the one everyone's been talking about that brought down that Qunari here."

"This is Warden Elissa daughter of the late Teyrn Bryce Cousland of Highever," Teagan broke his silence. "And I am Arl Teagan Guerrin of Redcliffe. We are merely trying to help our people perhaps you should make the effort to help your own as well."

"If you help them….you will have less to be offended about," Elissa looked at Francine.

"I'm sure she'll find something else to be offended about."

Elissa turned to see Alistair standing a few feet from her and she immediately forgot Francine and everybody else.

"You look handsome in that armor," Elissa wiped her eyes and smiled.

"This is the first time I've seen you in a dress," Alistair said.

"And what do you think?"  
>"You look as beautiful as I imagined you would be."<p>

"I…" Elissa began.

"Shh," Alistair pulled her close to him and swiped _his_thumb over _her_cheeks, wiping away _the_ tears as she wiped away his. "I just want to feel you in my arms again to make sure this is _real._"

"It's _real,_" Elissa wrapped her around his neck as he closed his eyes. He lifted her up as she kissed his forehead.

"I take it they haven't seen each other for a while," Lirene remarked.

"You could say that," Anders squeezed Jessica's hand as they watched the reunion. Glancing at Teagan, he saw him smiling and even a few of his men standing around were as well.

Not letting Elissa go, Alistair slowly backed into the estate and a grinning Sandal gave a little wave before closing the door.

….

**TO BE CONTINUED**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Anders stood by the door but could only hear the occasional muffled sobbing and laughter. Peering through the keyhole, he could see Elissa and Alistair were sitting on the bed with their arms around each other.

Jessica and Teagan watched as Anders came down the stairs.

"They're sitting on the bed with their arms around each other," Anders smiled. "Alistair is in his regular clothes and I think they're settling in to talk for a good long while which is something they both _need_."

"Thank the Maker," Teagan sighed.

"We shouldn't disturb them then," Jessica leaned closer to Anders as he put his arm around her. "I guess if they're hungry, they can go help themselves in the larder."

"They're Wardens love," Anders chuckled. "We all have the same inane talent of finding food when we're hungry."

"Speaking of food how about I treat the two of you to supper tonight?" Teagan grinned. "I hear the Golden Lion Inn in Hightown has marvelous food."

"It better," Anders laughed. "Jess invested some money there."

"Actually, it was a joint investment with Varric," Jess blushed. "And we'd be delighted to join you."

"I have a few things to attend to so how about we meet there in about an hour?" Teagan reached for his coat.

"We'll freshen up and see you then," Anders nodded.

Jessica turned to Anders after hearing the door close, "What's gotten in to you? You usually like staying in."  
>"Nothing," Anders put his arms around her. "I just feel like celebrating now that Ellie and Alistair have finally reunited. I also happen to <em>like<em> Teagan. He does not fear us or treat us differently just because we are mages. And by staying here he sees we are no different than anyone else."

"He's also Ferelden," Jessica kissed Anders nose.

"True," Anders chuckled as he kissed her back. "We may smell like dogs but we are step above these Free Marchers."

"Do you think we should leave a note?"

"No," Anders chuckled as he led Jessica up the stairs. "Let just leave them be. We should let Bhodan and Orana know."

"We'll do that before we leave," Jessica smiled as they entered their room.

…..

"I still can't believe you're here with me," Alistair let out a contended sigh as Elissa snuggled against him.

"I'm here and I am _not _going anywhere."

They had spent hours talking, crying and laughing. Elissa told him about her brother being alive, of Amaranthine and of her travels while Alistair told her how he wandered the Free Marches but settled in Kirkwall when mistakenly assuming she was dead.

"Loghain saved your life. I can't believe it."

"Riordan told us it takes a Warden to do the final blow because but in the process their soul is destroyed and they…die."

"And that's when Loghain volunteered?"

"Actually we didn't talk about it and Riordan was killed during the battle but by the grace of the Maker, he managed to bring it down on the roof of Fort Drakkon. We fought our way up to the roof and I managed to immobilize it. That final blow was the final thing that needed to be done. Loghain turned to me and said I was too young to die. He wanted to do it and he did. The armies had pretty much scattered back down so they didn't see it happen. This massive ray of light came out of the archdemon; there was an explosion that knocked us back. I actually passed out briefly and when I came to…it was finished. His body was lying near some darkspawn and we left it there."

"He saved your life and for that I'll be grateful but I will always regret abandoning you. My grief and anger for what happened to Duncan took over. And in that moment I forgot everything he taught me. There were even times in my stupor I got pleasure of assuming Loghain was spending his days in some darkspawn pit."

"That is why I wanted him to do the Joining. I figured it would either kill him or he'd spend his days in the Deeproads."

"What did you do after?"

"I went back to Highever to help my brother and had six months of peace before I was appointed Warden Commander which is something I only reluctantly agreed to because of the trouble that was going on there."

"Tell me about Fergus," Alistair hurriedly added a log to the fire and went back to the bed.

"He was seriously injured in the Wilds. He was taken in by the Chasind but was unconscious for most of the time. Wynne examined him and felt the remnants of some very powerful magic. He and a few of his men that survived managed to get away a month before the final battle and made his way to Highever where they battled with a unit of Howe's men that were stationed there. One wing of the castle was looted and everything in the treasury was gone but Howe did not find our other vault. Luckily, damage from the Blight was limited so the farmlands were not affected but Howe and his men really damaged the town. A lot of good people fled but a lot of people from nearby villages and townships came to Highever."

"It must have been difficult going back with all that happened," Alistair caressed her cheek.

"It was," Elissa nodded. "And Fergus was actually angry with me for a bit when I conscripted Nathaniel."

"But he did get over it?"

"Nathaniel saved him and his men from some bandits when they were on the road. My brother used to travel with two knights. And it just happened Nathaniel was going to see him after the darkspawn situation was dealt with. There were over dozen bandits. Fergus and his men got a few of them but there too many. Luckily, Nathaniel is excellent with a bow and brought a lot of them down. When my brother went to thank the man for his assistance, he realized it was Nathaniel."

"And how did it go?"

"Fergus hit him and they fought for a while. My brother told me the fighting was a way of releasing their grief."

"Did Nathaniel want to see your brother to apologize for his father's actions?"

"He went to see Fergus because I was injured in the battle that put an end to everything with the darkspawn. Nathaniel knew Fergus had been angry with me for conscripting him. Back at the keep, we discovered his father's journals. He was plotting my family's demise for years. Nathaniel also learned the reason why he was sent away and it was because his father considered him soft and figured he would not approve of his actions. Fergus rallied all the townships and villages to send aid to Amaranthine and the keep and then Nathaniel brought him to me."

"And you made up?"

"Yes," Elissa smiled. "Oh we still argue the way siblings do but he dotes on me too."

"So did he become friends with Nathaniel?"

"I wouldn't say they are friends. There is a mutual respect and understanding now between the two of them. Fergus even granted him some land for saving him. Nathaniel gave the land to his sister and her husband and an estate is being built for them."

"It's good you and your brother made up."

"I'm close to his new wife too."

"Your brother remarried?"

"He became close to the woman who ran the local apothecary in Highever. Sandrine was a young widow. Her husband died during the wasting outbreak before the Blight along with some of her family. She is beautiful, strong, and very dedicated to helping people. Fergus fell in love with her. He even adopted her little girl, Marie and they had a son, Bryce Oren."

"I'm happy your brother has healed from his wounds."

"Fergus has healed physically and emotionally but the scars will _always_ be there. He's become a little more guarded when it comes to trusting people and takes a unit of his men with him when traveling. Sandrine and the children have filled the castle with laughter again though and to see Fergus smiling again…it fills my heart."

"Did you tell him about me?" Alistair's eyes widened.

"A little bit but you need not worry," Elissa chuckled.

"I just want to make things _right_ Ellie…with you and everybody."

"Alistair you are already making things right just by being _with me_," Elissa put her arms around him. "We'll have plenty of time to talk about all of this later."

"Alright," Alistair kissed her nose. "I'll stop rambling."

"Actually, I've missed your rambling," Elissa snuggled against him, as they got comfortable.

"So tell me one thing. What happened with Morrigan after I left?"

"She left before the battle."

"Morrigan _abandoned _you?" Alistair sat up and looked at her.

"She had this offer that would guarantee us not dying during the final battle."

"What did she want?"

"She wanted to conceive a child with Loghain. Morrigan mentioned that the essence of the old God would be absorbed by the child but would not be corrupted. In turn, that would guarantee our safety."

"Are you saying Morrigan wanted to sleep with Loghain?"

"If had not been Loghain it would have been _you_," Elissa looked at him.

"Wow! Going to have to think about this," Alistair winced and shook his head.

"I did see Morrigan again though. I had received some reports about someone with her description in the Wilds so I tracked her."

"And what did she want?"

"When I finally found her, she was standing near this mirror in the Dragon Wastes and warned me about her mother and how the world was going to change and then she disappeared in the mirror."

"What do you mean?"

"The mirror was not a normal mirror. It had…no reflection and it was cloudy and rippled the _same_ way after you throw stones in a pond. She disappeared but left me a gift before leaving."

"I'm afraid to ask what this gift was."

"It was a very old book detailing an account of a female Warden who was cured of the taint."

"That's all?"

"No but it's not important to talk about now."

"Well now it my turn and there's something I need to know. When we go back to Ferelden will Anora arrest me?"

"No," Elissa chuckled. "A couple of hours after you left we told her you agreed to lead soldiers to help defend the docks and that you planned to leave Ferelden after the battle. Afterwards you were presumed dead and Zevran came upon some information that guaranteed not only your safety, but also _encouraged_ her to make Eamon chancellor and Teagan became Arl of Redcliffe. As a boon, he even got to keep his bannorn which is being controlled by a regent until his son is old enough to inherit it."

"This information must be something _big_," Alistair raised a brow.

"It is," Elissa nodded. "And when I found out it angered me considering the sacrifices we make as Wardens."

"Can you tell me what it is? Does Eamon know? Or Teagan?"

"They don't know but I do eventually plan to tell Teagan. I owe it to him."

"Well you know I won't blab it to anyone," Alistair chuckled.

"When Anora was three, her mother died after giving birth to a stillborn son. And that haunted her to the point where she employed outside magical help, which purposely made her…barren. She will _never _have an heir to the throne."

"Did Loghain know about this?"

"No. Zevran found her journal in the room Howe used at the palace and located a back alley printer so we paid him to make copies for us. That printer was planning to leave Ferelden so we generously paid him for his silence. I then arranged to have tea with the queen."

"I bet she hates you," Alistair laughed.

"She wasn't thrilled with my demands but respected my savvy."

"So down the road there will be a fight for the throne."

"Yes," Elissa sighed. "I don't hate Anora and she's been a decent ruler but I don't approve of her actions and I believe it's going to come back to haunt her."

"I'm certainly relieved I won't have any bounty hunters after me."

"You won't," Elissa chuckled. "And I have a plan about I'm going to explain you to the Wardens. Varric is a master storyteller so I intend to ask him for some help in polishing it."

"What is your plan?"

"Amnesia," Elissa smiled. "You were wounded while fighting on the docks in Denerim. You fell and somehow hit your head. Floating in the water, you were fished out by some people and mistakenly put on a departing ship where you ended up in Kirkwall."

"And then I was cured of this amnesia?"

"Two apostates fleeing Kirkwall's rigid oppression helped you in exchange for some coin. Like I said, I'm going to have Varric help me."

"I _hate_ that you have to lie like this," Alistair frowned. "Like I said I am going to make things right."

"And I know you will," Elissa caressed his cheek. "You have to trust me on this because it's going to work."

"I trust you," Alistair kissed her cheek.

"Let's just enjoy these moments," Elissa stifled a yawn.

"I'm getting tired myself," Alistair admitted.

"Let's go to sleep then."

"You mean you're not going to your room?"

"Alistair, I've slept alone for nearly four years. I do not intend to sleep alone again. I'll bring my things in here tomorrow."

"Fine by me," Alistair grinned and yawned. "I'm too tired to change into those night clothes Hawke gave me."

Alistair yawned again then smiled when feeling Elizabeth put an across his chest. He reached down and closed his hand around hers.

"It won't be the last time we sleep in our clothes," Elizabeth closed her eyes.

As they slept, the _fire crackled _and _cast eerie_shadows on the walls. The door opened but exhaustion had overcome them.

Smiling, Sandal closed the door, then climbed in the bed and sat down between Alistair and Elissa watching them sleep as he pulled out two glowing runestones from his pocket placing one on each of them.

…..

**TO BE CONTINUED**


End file.
